Sesshomaru: The After Story
It had been ten years since Sesshomaru decided to leave Rin in the human village with Kaede. The great Inu Daiyokai had live a long and respectible life thus far. He had many accomplishments under his belt and not a single defeat to speak of.
However, no matter how powerful he was, and feared no matter how much more power he gained.. He had to admit, if only to himself, that those last ten years had been some of the longest and most difficult of his entire life. Not a single defeat to speak of... But those past ten years had almost defeat him. Nearly.. Time had him by the throat and it was putting up a damn good fight.
Sesshoumaru was to wait until Rin was of age and able to make the choice for herself whether or not to continue her life as his companion or, live out her life in the human village.
He was not fond of this arrangement. Of Rin being left behind, so far away from him. Nor the idea of handing her the power to freely, choose to stay there, leaving him behind forever.
He had contemplated these thoughts for many years now. The thought of her choosing him, or not choosing him, forcing himself to leave her behind in the first place, even entertaining the idea of giving anyone other than himself the power to decide something that directly affected him.
He knew what he wanted and was pretty sure what she wanted as well. Or least, knew what she wanted when she was a child, before he left her behind..
He did have to admit that the freedom of only having to think and do for himself, of not having to split his concentration, or focus all of his concentration on someone else was, to say the least, refreshing. But, that was literally the only one, small, pro to the past ten years without his beloved Rin at his side.
He did not want to leave her behind. He wanted to be with her always. To gaze upon her features, to hear her laughter, her incessant questioning, her... Her everything. Just her, always and forever.
But, he also wanted what was best for her and if he ever wanted anything to blossom between them, he had to force himself, however unwilling he was, to allow her to make her own decisions in some things.
'Blossom?..' Sesshoumaru pondered this for a moment.
He'd been acting out of character over the course of those past ten years and his condition was only growing worse the closer he got to the finish line.
He had grown accustomed to his newly developed odities though. They still annoyed him but, they no longer freaked him the hell out. Not like in the beginning. That very first night without her was definitely the worst of it.
He couldn't place his finger on it... But, something wasn't quite right. Something was... Not quite wrong either... But, missing...
For the second time in his life, his aimless wandering for power made him curious. Just as Tenseiga had. This feeling, he wasn't accustomed to.
He had been completely content to wander the Feudal lands, until the end of time, slaying his fathers foes. Killing any who dared try and take their revenge on him. As if his father's stupidity had any tie to him what so ever. He wanted every yokai that stood before him to know their place... Beneath him.
But then there was Rin... She consumed him, poluting his mind in the most... Beautiful ways...
'Beautiful?..' This girl was going to be the death of him..
No. He had never considered 'settling down'. Never considered what else he might do. What else was there to do? As an Inu Daiyokai of his station, power was everything.
Wasn't he already on the right path? Even though it was logical, even though his previous life choices made sense. He couldn't rid himself of that feeling...
Maybe something was wrong. Had this Sesshomaru made the wrong choice? Was this great and powerful daiyokai Lord really to be brought down by a mere human child?
Sesshoumaru, the feared, the all powerful, the undefeated... To be slain by this tiny, beautiful, human girl. He didn't know it as he walked away, leaving her behind in that human village, so many years ago. Rin kicking and screaming in Kaede's arms, pleading for her Lord Sesshoumaru to take her with him.
And he never would have admited it HAD he known it then. But, he was all too aware of his fate now and had accepted it, willingly and without thought of escape.
That tiny, beautiful, human girl would be his undoing. The end of life as he knew it.
'Perhaps mother was right...' He'd find himself thinking.
::Ten years previous::
It was a cool night, almost Autumn, the wind gently caressing his hair and the moon shinning down on him. He looked up at this moon, picturing Rin.
His body stiff, his features stoic. he sat down against a tree, never averting his gaze from the moon. Lost in contemplation for, what felt like, the first time in his life.
His eyes glazed over, the space around him vanishing in swirls of darkness, the moon morphing into... Rin..
Nothing but Rin.
Sesshomaru could remember every single thing the child had done, said, sang, and asked since the moment he revived her in the woods. The sound of her voice, her laughter, her pretty little songs..
Sesshomaru's insides squirmed a bit, pretty?
But, his thoughts pondered on, un-phased... Her constant need for answer's, the soft padding noises her feet made hitting the bare earth beneath them as she followed him. She followed him, and he too followed her. To the ends of the earth, to literally hell and back, he fallowed his Rin. He needed his Rin... 'Need?..' He cared for her, he protected her.
'My Rin... Mine...' He'd find himself thinking..
He had fought hard to keep her alive in the beginning. So hard he fought. He thought perhaps his mother was right, never before had he been prone to such foolishness.
He risked his own life leaping into the depths of hell after Rin. But the more curious thing about such events was that he didn't even think about it.
There was no need to.
No thought process existed for the potential break in the emotional bond he and the little human girl shared.
'Bond?' Surely there was something wrong with this Sesshomaru.
Even though he couldn't quite put his finger on what was going on inside his mind, he knew full well foolishness was not it. Saving the girl was NOT foolish. The only thought he could coherently decipher, at that moment, before jumping throught that portal after her was...
'I can't go on without her...'
A life without his Rin? An eternitity without his beloved Rin? To him that seemed foolish. But his mother was right about one thing
Never before...
Sesshomaru shifted, raising his left knee and resting his arm across it. He did this almost unconsciously, as he was still lost in his own thoughts.
'What if she doesn't choose me? What if she's happier with her human companions? What if she... Finds... A mate?...'
Sesshomaru's stomach tightened uncomfortably at this, but his thoughts only trailed on, ignoring their thinkers discomfort.
'What would become of him, if his Rin chose another? Would he kill her mate? Was he so consumed by her that he would really kill for...His Feelings? For the place at her side? A human girl?'
He could feel his body temperature rising from his thoughts as irational anger raged through his body, when his second thought finally hit him, and he froze.
'She should be my... Mate... Obviously...'
Rin... His Rin.. As his mate? Ludicrous. Surely she would never... Rin wouldn't... At that, a slightly embarrassing picture of he and Rin penetrated his mind.
He was so shocked by the images his mind was asaulting him with that Sesshomaru literally shook his head, as if to physically rid himself of such vulgar and ridiculous ideas.
'But... Is it really so ridiculous?'
He had thought, after all, that he and his little human companion would be together forever. He hadn't put much thought into the alternative. He thought...
No.
He knew that Rin never wanted to stay in that village, and how she cried for him... Begging him to take her with him. Pitiful human tears streaming down her beautiful, little face.
He wanted to punch himself for making his Rin cry. Wanted to turn around, scoop her up and run off with her. Leaving that horrid little village behind them forever.
But, Sesshomaru just kept walking, never looking back, leaving his tiny, human, crying Rinbehind.
He was curious about that as well. He acted as always, in the best interest of the girl. For her safety. Yet, she was upset.
'Had this Sesshomaru done something wrong?'
It wasn't just her reaction that caused his curiosity either. He noticed, briefly, before dismissing altogether, that his feet seemed... Heavy. Like there was lead strapped to them, and his heart.. The way it beat, and the way his chest heaved, slightly exerted, and these physical annoyances only grew worse the farther he got from the village...
'But I'd gladly take on any physical discomfort, any foe.. As opposed to these thoughts... These.. Feelings'... He thought to himself, just wanting to understand it all.
The moon was setting now. The sound of birds chirping their morning melodies, and the stirring of nearby humans, prepairing for their duties for the day brought him out of his trance.
The sky was a reddish yellow now, as the sun was making it's way up to it's mark. He'd been there all night, and he hadn't even begun his journey yet. This time he had places to be, things to do. There was much to consider, much to plan for... Much less wandering to do, and much more business.
He felt annoyed with himself again. He'd wasted an entire night under a tree, staring at the moon thinking such ridiculous thoughts... Silly human girl...
He rose gracefully, dusting off his backside and straightening. He rested his left hand on Tenseiga , and left the other to hang loosely.
He looked towards the West. He had duties to attend to. His Father had left a mess behind him, and Sesshomaru was the only one left to clean it up.
There was a slight twitch in his right eye. Irritation towards thoughts of his father. A mental sigh pushed him to start moving. He needed to distance himself from this place. From Rin.
She'd been gone only a night now, and he hadn't even been able to leave the forest just outside the village. Her new home. Without him... He needed to get away, any distraction was better than this... Feeling.
He did not turn, he stayed in the position of the West, standing tall and proud. But, from the corner of his eye, he did glance towards the village, and for a split second sniffed the air for her scent before leaping into the air and transforming.
He would just have to wait... Prepare... His Rin would surely choose him above all else.. Always..? He was sure.
