"Bang, bang, bang". "Uggg" i moaned as i slowly rolled over in my bed "who could be knocking at...5 in the freaking morning!" " BANG, BANG, BANG" " I'm coming I'm coming. So I rolled out of bed threw on a par of pants and walked to the front door and as I slowly opened the door the uniformed man out front took off his hat and said the dreaded words I'd been praying I'd never hear " Umino Iruka on today at 2:30 am eastern pacific time, Hatake Kakashi died heroically in the line of battle protecting... after that I stopped listening. couldn't bare hearing the rest of what the man had to say It had felt like someone had reached in to the very depth of my soul and stole the only thing keeping me sane since naruto had died and kakashi had been drafted to join the war. My hope. My hope that one day I would again wake up to kakashi kissing me on the cheek while i smelt the fresh bacon and eggs he had just brought up for me before I left for work...b-but no I would never have that again. and with that thought the tears started to fall and as the man reached out to comfort me i slammed the door in his face ran upstairs and laid down to sleep so that i could escape the pain, praying, praying to god that i would never wake up never again, would I feel this pain. But of course the next day I woke up as I did every day since then. I picked up drinking and slowly but surely I shut out all the people who still cared, and wasted away my days drinking and sleeping, sleeping and drinking...I didn't care enough to eat. At the start one of my many long days I awoke to konahamaru knocking at my door asking why i had been at school. "oh ya school..." " I'm not going...I'm never going.... I don't care enough anymore ..... I quit, and with that I had given up the very last thing that even remotely kept me going. I had barely gone to work and when I did I was always sent home early for being wasted. I end up following my usually routine of getting enough alcohol for the day sitting down on the couch and thinking, thinking about them, but today a new thought came to mind I have nothing left to live for i had given up the very last thing just a few seconds ago so why, why am i even barely trying, sure if i begged i could get my job back but a part of me didn't want that a large part of me didn't want to have that last reason to try...I didn't want to live ...I didn't have to live. I had a gun upstairs under my bed and i could end it... i could end it now. And with that i rushed upstairs wrote down my final wishes and requests and a sorry for those who still cared I pulled out my gun brought it to my head and for the first time in months i was happy again...truly happy "Kakashi...Naruto... I'll be with you soon i miss you" and with that i wiped away my tears put my finger on the trigger and BANG!!!!.....finally finally i had my sweet relief.
