A/N: Oh new story…well stories. I was bored and figured hey I don't write any comedies…actually I'm not very good at comedies so I figured let's work on that. So here I am, working on that. I wrote this one actually like a month ago and then forgot about it till I found it again today. So basically this will just be a bunch of stories put together with a common theme. Icha Icha Paradise hehe. So enjoy and forgive me if I'm not funny, because I'm not.
"How could you not?"
"Dobe."
Team 7 stood in front of what had been Kakashi's secret stash of books. Somehow Naruto had found them by accident while he was "training". To say the least they didn't survive the encounter.
"You're going to get it." Sakura said already imagining how their teacher would react when he discovered the pile of paper pieces that used to be his precious collection of Icha Icha Paradise. Naruto began to sweat; already his nerves were on edge. What was he going to do? Obviously he couldn't replace them. He had no idea just how many there had been originally.
"He'll be coming back soon." Sasuke remarked glancing at the clock on the wall. This only led Naruto to sweat further, his eyes darting back and forth around the room.
"Well Naruto it was nice knowing you." Patting his back, Sakura made for the door.
"Hey where are you going?" Naruto asked a slight panic filling in his voice as his hand, outstretched twitched.
"I'm leaving."
"What?" Looking next to her he spotted Sasuke reaching for the door. "You too!" Sasuke merely looked annoyed not wanting to respond. Like Sakura, he didn't want to be around to see Kakashi's reaction upon his arrival. "You can't leave me here!" Naruto whined causing both his teammates to wince.
"Sure we can." Sakura responded rubbing her hurting ears. "You were the one snooping and you were the one that found them and you were the one that destroyed them with your attack whatever it's called."
"Rasengan!" Naruto piped, annoyed at his attack being ignored in such a way.
"Whatever, it's all your fault and your problem." Sakura finished putting as much emphasize in his direction of the blame as she could, just as Sasuke slowly inched closer to the door having earlier been pulled back by Naruto. He was so close, oh yes he could almost feel his freedom. Naruto protested, sticking fully with his story, it was an accident, a grand misunderstanding, a mishap, an unfortunate event, completely ignorant to Sasuke's slow movements towards his freedom. Finding no sympathy whatsoever from his pink-haired teammate, he decided to try and get Sasuke on his side when he noticed the Uchiha halfway out the door.
"No!" Jumping at the boy Naruto clung onto his legs, holding on for dear life. Sasuke, taken aback by the blonde's actions began to shake his leg furiously trying to shake off the persistent boy.
"Naruto, get off!" Sasuke growled shaking his leg even harder, only leading to Naruto clinging on for dear life. Sasuke moved about their sensei's apartment furiously working to get his leg Naruto free, but nothing seemed to work. Sakura growing angry every second, her fury becoming more and more evident, due to two reasons that she found clearly valid for her anger, one Naruto was being annoying, as usual and two she should be the only one to cling to Sasuke's leg.
"Naruto!" Swinging her fist, Sakura aimed for Naruto, who having heard her familiar "Naruto death cry" as he had begun to call it over time had seen her coming. Fearing for his life, he let go of Sasuke's leg just as Sasuke kicked it up. The lack of weight making him lose his balance, Sasuke fell forward, getting the full force of Sakura's punch.
Time froze as three troubled children lay sprawled in their sensei's apartment. Sakura's anger having subsided instantly, stared in horror, seeing Sasuke twitching on the ground, his eye turning an odd shade of purple, every second getting darker. "Sasuke-kun!" She cried having realized what she's done. "Gomen!" Naruto on the ground far from the two burst out laughing, fully enjoying the sight in front of him, Sakura's head whipped around, her eyes shining with a fury that shut up the kyuubi-vessel so fast he bit his tongue, which in turn earned him to jump to his feet dancing about in pain. Knocking into the chair behind it, it was pushed back hitting the shelf near it, which then knocked it over. Naruto oblivious to the extra mess he was now contributing to his previous kept his dancing, babbling about his tongue. Sakura forgetting about Naruto and Sasuke for the second watched as the shelf seemingly in slow motion dropped to the ground with a crash spilling all it's contents about.
Rising from his stupor Sasuke's hand reached for his hand eye. Groaning, he was surprised it hurt him so much. He would now know to never make his rose haired teammate angry…ever. He wasn't sure he'd survive the second encounter. Hearing his groan Sakura turned back to Sasuke spilling a string of apologies and explanations.
Dancing, apologizing and muttering, it went on all three having forgotten about the original problem at hand until the clock struck the new hour, the chime bringing all to a silence. Three pair of eyes slowly turned to the clock, their eyes growing wide as they remembered. In a flash Sakura and Sasuke raced for the door, determined to flee the scene before they could be pinpointed to any of the mess that surrounded them. Naruto seeing them run away leapt towards them grabbing onto both their legs begging for them to stay with him.
"Let go!"
"Naruto!"
"Don't leave me!"
All three struggled, fighting desperately, two to rid themselves of their human chain, one determined to keep them their with him at all costs.
"No!"
"I'm going to kill you!"
"That goes double!"
Rolling about blind to anything bought their current goals they struggled on. Rolling left then rolling right, kicks flying left and right.
"Let…go!"
"Dobe!"
"You can't leave me!"
"Shut up!" They both cried kicking at him harder stopping only when they heard a surprised hmmm coming from behind them. Three heads turned, their eyes slowly looking up. Two legs, dropped down as two hands let go.
There stood Naruto, his face scratched and red, his hair messed up and his clothes wrinkled and ragged looking.
There stood Sasuke, overall he appeared fine except for one eye which shined such a purple it could make you cry.
All three of them looking at the ground, guilt ranked in all their faces, though none quite like Naruto's. Around them was at one time Kakashi's apartment, but somehow in the span of thirty minutes had become a site of a battlefield, or so it seemed. Their sensei had been silent for 3 minutes registering the damage. His students anxiously waiting for him to beginning scolding him, they could feel it coming and the waiting was too much to bear. Slowly Kakashi's eye stopped to a pile of paper, piled quite high in one corner. Unlike the rest of the room this bothered him the most. He never recalled having such a collection. Making his way towards the pile, three young teens held their breath knowing where their sensei was heading.
Bending over the pile Kakashi picked up one of the pages, his eyes scanning its content. Three sizes, that's how wide his eye grew realizing this seemingly meaningless pile was his precious, precious collection of books. Dropping down to his knees he clutched at the papers, wailing loudly at his sudden loss. Three heads turned a look of confusion and shock reflected in their eyes. Bringing the papers closer, Kakashi hugged the papers tightly wailing even louder than before. Slowly three very guilty figures inched to the door, quietly exited the room. Shutting the door behind them all three breathed a sigh of relief, they were fine now. Looking up, their faces drained of color. There before them stood a very angry Kakashi, pointing back inside his apartment.
"That's the wrong page Naruto." Kakashi pointed out to the very disturbed boy. Groaning, Naruto began to undue the stitching he had just spent two hours working on. Next to him were Sakura and Sasuke both equally disturbed and equally annoyed. In front of them was the huge pile of Icha Icha Paradise pages, of which they had only managed to correctly find and put together three volumes.
I'm going to kill him! Sakura thought, trying her best to avoid reading the contents she held. My fingers…the needles…no ramen… Naruto droned in his mind, having pricked himself yet again. Sasuke twitched every so often, feeling his brain slowly turning to mush as his eyes managed to land on the most descriptive parts of the pages. Death…just you wait…Naruto. Kakashi beamed, picking one of the finished ones up. "Ah this one's my favorite." Opening to the first page, he began to read. "Only 17 more to go." He received three very distressed groans in reply.
