Disclaimer- All dialogue, and even the behavior of the characters in this scene belongs to Ms. Bray...even if I have tweaked it a bit. But Kartik's thoughts in this story, those are mine.

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It is Christmas morning and I am sitting in the carriage house, busy brushing Ginger and getting her ready for another day of towing the Doyle family everywhere they need to go. It is early, and I don't think that anyone else is awake yet.

And I'm wrong.

I can hear light footsteps coming from outside, and then I see someone emerging from the gloom of a cold, grey, winter morning. My head whips up to look at my intruder, and I see a tall girl with red-gold hair and clear green eyes.

Gemma.

She walks in quietly, almost shyly, and then turns to face me. She has the strangest expression on her face, it is as if she is trying to look cheerful, but her eyes can't be anything but solemn. I can see that she is still upset about how her father went back to smoking and drinking last night, and can't stop.

There is another emotion in her eyes as well, one which I can't quite place, but which makes me feel odd, self conscious. I do not enjoy feeling self conscious, but I can't help it, and I'm not sure what I should say.

She breaks the silence, "I've come to apologize for last night."

Ah, so that's why she came to see me at 5:30 in the morning. That makes perfect sense. NOT. There must be something else on her mind or she wouldn't have bothered coming.

Gemma continues talking, "And to thank you for helping him."

Now I realize why she's come. She doesn't want to thank me, she needs to talk to someone about her father. I smile at her in what I hope is an understanding way. I can see that this topic, her father's addiction, disturbs and embarrasses her, greatly.

"Everyone needs help sometimes" I say.

Gemma gives me a wry smile, "Except for you"

Without thinking I run a hand through my hair. Oh, how mistaken she is, I do need help. I need my brother, the only family I've truly had since joining the Rakshana. I need him to guide me, to help me choose the right thing to do. Should I help Gemma, truly help her? Or do what the Rakshana ask me to do, and pretend to aid her, convince her to bind the magic in the name of the Rakshana, and then…

And then kill her? How am I going to chose between my lifelong duty and my heart? Amar, couldn't you have left the woman to die? She was doomed anyhow, and I need you, now more than ever.

Gemma is still looking at me, her green eyes inquiring, waiting for me to reply so I pick up a tiny bundle I had attempted to wrap earlier, and hand it to her.

"Merry Christmas Miss Doyle"

She looks at me, perplexed, "What is it?"

I laugh at her inwardly. What there ever a more pointless question?

"Why don't you try opening it?"

Gemma laughs, a beautiful sound, and shakes her head at her own stupidity. Then she opens the package. I closely regard her face, trying to see if, desperately hoping that, she likes it.

The first expression which crosses her features is confusion. She does not recognize the figure on the handle of the knife I gave her, so I explain it to her. "He's Megh Sambara, the Hindu's believe that he offers protection against enemies."

"I thought you had no loyalty to any customs other than the Rakshana's?" She asks, eyeing me carefully with a hint of a smirk on her face. She really does love proving me wrong. But this time I'm not wrong, she is. Well, sort of.

While it's technically true that I am not supposed to follow, or practice Hindu customs, they remind me of my parents somehow, and of my true home miles and miles away. Not that I'm going to tell her that.

"The knife was Amar's"

"You shouldn't part with it then" Gemma says softly, and she gestures to return the knife to me. I'm sure that I would have found this touching, if she hadn't nearly slashed my arm in the process. Luckily I jumped back before she could cause me any harm.

"Careful, it is small but sharp. And you may have need of it."

She blinks, and then with a grim expression she says, "I shall keep it with me, thank you."

When she stops talking, she looks down at the floor, looking uncomfortable. The room falls deathly silent. Heck, I reckon the whole city is silent right now; just to ensure that this awkward silence can eat away at me for the longest possible amount of time.

Clip. Clip. The only sound I can hear is Ginger impatiently pawing the floor. Clip, clip. Nervously I run a hand through my hair.

In an effort to lighten the mood, and because I feel genuinely curious, I ask, "Tonight is Miss Worthington's ball, yes?"

A hint of a smile tugs at the corner of Gemma's mouth and her eyes shine when she says, "Yes"

Something about how happy the mention of a ball makes her tugs at my heart. How is it that a ball, a mere party can cause her so much joy? Will there be gifts? Fine food? Hoards of handsome and carefree, English men lined up to embrace her? Could a young Indian boy, longing to attend the ball instead of wait outside, alone in the cold snow, ever fit in? The wondering will drive me insane.

"What do you do at these balls?" There I asked it. Now was that so hard Kartik?

She sighs softly, "Oh, there is a great deal of smiling and talking of the weather and how lovely everyone looks. There is a light supper and refreshments. And the dancing of course."

That's it? All of that wondering and straining my eyes against the curtains of closed windows for that? Still, from what I know of British dancing, it involves a man and a woman, holding each other close. My insides clench in a familiar way. Jealousy. No matter how I try, I can't get rid of this feeling.

"I've never been to a ball. I don't know how this sort of dancing is done." It's true enough, and I do want to learn how to dance, it could come in handy someday. Another skill to add to my list. I am not saying this because I have some insane desire to hold her close to me. No sir, not me.

Gemma grins at me, happy to know something I don't. "It isn't so difficult to master for a man" she says "The woman has to learn to do it in reverse, without stepping on his feet."

So the man leads…Thank goodness. I know I wouldn't be able to follow without hurting someone. Agile as I can be, I know that I haven't the grace for this sort of thing.

"Like this" I ask, leaping about while holding my arms up to support my imaginary partner.

She laughs, not unkindly, and corrects me, "A bit slower. That's it."

Now I'm grinning. I've got it! It's a silly thing to feel excited about, but I can't help it. No other Indian I know can dance this way, it's an English skill, through and through. I decide to take a stab at English, ballroom style conversation as well.

"I say Lady Whatsit, have you had many callers since arriving in London?" I try my hardest not to laugh and I gaze intently into the lovely eyes of my pretend dance partner. Currently her eyes are located in Ginger's ear.

I get the reaction I was hoping for; Gemma laughs.

"Oh Lord Hoity-toity, why I've so many cards from the very best people that I've had to put out two china bowls to display them all."

I smile. I can just imagine a woman being vain enough to display the cards of her admirers, and then brag about it.

"Two bowls, you say?"

"Two bowls."

"What an inconvenience for you and your china collection." I say solemnly. Then I can't help it, I burst out laughing.

Gemma smiles at me, in a way that makes my heart flutter again. "I should like to see you in a black jacket and white tie."

Would she? Really?

"Do you think I would look the grand gentleman?" I ask meeting her emerald eyes.

She nods confidently, "Yes."

Me, a gentleman? Although it goes against all I have been taught and believe in, sometimes I wish I were just that. If I were, perhaps I could have met Gemma on a London ballroom, rather than on a crowded Bombay street. Perhaps I wouldn't have had to prove myself over and over again just to be considered inferior to her. Perhaps I could have even come to mean something to her. Something more than just a boy who needs her to complete a mission.

"May I have this dance Miss Doyle?"

Gemma giggles. "Oh, but of course Lord Hoity-toity."

I shake my head at her softly, "No, Gemma. May I have this dance?"

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The second (and final) part of this should be up soon, and until then, please review! :)