A/N: As promised - here is my oneshot for 'OliviaMellark' to celebrate getting 100 views on my work-in-progress story 'New Beginnings'! She wanted a Galeniss one with pregnancy and Peeta kind of woven in here. Trying to do this all in a oneshot! Hope I've done it justice.
**Post- Mockingjay time, but Gale came back to 12, and Katniss ended up with him instead of Peeta.**
"Gale I'm too big for this now!" I moan as I sit down on a nearby rock, out of breath and clutching my huge stomach. The heat from the sun pours down on me, making me hot and sticky under it's rays. Hunting was a lot easier when I wasn't seven months pregnant. The thought of leaving the woods behind though whilst he went out fills me with sadness; It was just as much as a home to us as the Seam was.
Before I know it, there's a cool, soft hand spread out across my forehead. I look up to meet his gaze; his eyebrows are drawn together in worry.
"You're not too hot." Gale states, but he still looks concerned. He crouches down beside the rock I've collapsed on and rests his palms on my knees, giving them a gentle squeeze. "We're nearly at the lake Catnip. As soon as we get there we can cool you down." He adds, and the imagery of our special spot is enough to keep me going. I heave myself back up with his help, adjusting my bow on my back, and silently cursing my boots, which are convenient, yet awfully hot on my swollen feet.
As we walk along quietly, so as not to scare away any potential game, I can tell Gale stands in front of me in a protective manner, something he's done naturally ever since we found out we were having a child together. It's almost as if he's trying to be my shield; he feels like so many things were out of his reach in terms of keeping me safe in our past, but that in this environment, it's within his control to keep the three of us away from harm. So I let him, even though I am capable of defending myself firmly from any predators that may come my way. His muscular body is toned, and giant in comparison to me as he hovers closeby.
I pick up on a sound the same time he does. With both of our bows drawn in synchronicity, we catch the glimpse of the deer at the same time. As if we were connected telepathically, we wait a split second before our two arrows whoosh through the air at the same time and hit our prey. Mine has been speared straight between the deer's eyes with precision, and Gale's has hit it's gut. He would normally get mad at the fact that he could have ruined the meat from this shot, but not today. With the blue sky above us, and the happiness we both feel, he simply chuckles before turning to me.
"How is it that you're pregnant and you still have better co-ordination than me? After all this time." He asks playfully, slinging the bow back over his shoulder, as I do the same. It sticks a little uncomfortably into my stomach, but I ignore it, refusing to let my small triumph over him be diluted.
"Hey! I may be having your child but I still got skills." I murmur, winking at him as he rolls his eyes.
We walk over to our kill which is at least twenty feet away, and Gale takes out the arrows, throwing the body over the other shoulder from his bow and quiver. I cringe as the smell of it hits me, and push back the sudden wash of emotion at seeing it's big black eyes open and looking straight through me. But it's too late, because before I know it, I'm crying. Gale turns around in surprise as he hears me sniff, but then his face lightens in understanding.
"Catnip. God I'm sorry, I didn't think. I know you're sensitive about this stuff now." He says apologetically and I wave a hand in dismissal.
"I hate these hormones." I mutter, wiping my face roughly. I'm trying to laugh now, to show him I'm really okay. This stuff never bothered me before, but of course, everything is different in your mind and body when you're thinking and feeling for two people instead of one. He looks helplessly at the deer, wondering whether or not to leave it here, but even though food is plentiful now in 12 after re-building it eight years ago, it's still deeply ingrained in us not to waste a carcass.
"Keep going." I say, motioning forwards, and just wanting to get to the cool pool of water now. He smiles with sympathy and links his hand furthest away from the deer, in mine, helping me move onward, and reassuring me.
"I like the hormone-side of you. Kind of cute." He says after a minute of walking and brushes a finger lightly over my nose before resuming our hand-holding. I give him what I hope to be a glare but this only makes him smirk more.
Neither of us had been affectionate people naturally, but when a year had passed, and Gale finally moved back, we talked. We talked for hours and hours upon end, venting out everything that ever was, and is between us and we listened to each other. He didn't understand certain aspects of my life and I didn't understand some of his, but it was okay, because we were similar. We thought the same, we had similar characteristics, so we worked. Gale, with the help of others helped get me out of the pit I was trapped in, and for that I was eternally grateful. It had taken us a while to get back to being friends, and from that we became inseparable. Eventually, one afternoon as Gale held me in his arms in front of my fire, I realized that it was him I couldn't live without, and I wanted to be something more than what we were.
I never thought the day would come when I would be carrying his child, but Gale had always been paternal and wanted children, so eventually I'd learnt to want that too. Gale made me feel secure, and was never short on showing me how much he loved me. We'd both changed. His rage-fueled fire had dwindled out a little, and I was in a better frame of mind these days then ever before.
By the time we reach our spot, I'm covered in sweat and feel uncomfortable in my skin. Being pregnant was a wonderful thing, especially when it's starting a family with Gale whom I love now more than anything in this world. But I also couldn't wait for it to be over. Gale puts down all of our things and helps me carefully undress due to my size making simple tasks rather difficult for me to do myself. I hated losing the independence, but if anyone was going to see me at my most vulnerable, I would forever prefer Gale. Just as he peeled off my shirt, using feather-light touches as he grazes my belly, I freeze abruptly.
"Catnip?" He asks, his voice a little panicked. "What's wrong love?" Gale's eyes scan over my body, naturally looking for a cause of harm. I feel hot swollen tears spill out of my eyes suddenly as I grab his hand and thrust it onto my stomach. His eyes widen in excitement.
"Can you feel that?" I questioned, "That was such a big one! I've never felt him kick so hard before." My breath comes back to normal a little as Gale continues to stroke my stomach lovingly.
"Strong, like it's mother." Gale says, almost as if to himself. Then he looks back up at me again, keeping his hands there though. "It could still be a girl you know. I don't know why you're so set on it being a boy." He murmurs but sits down beside me on the grass and peppers my bump with light kisses. I laugh at the sensation and the sight.
"It will be a boy, I know it." I sigh at the image in my head as Gale's kisses work their way up me, until he settles for my collarbone. His warm breath tickles my skin and makes every end of my nerves feel alive with static. "And he'll be just like you. Beautiful." I continue, but my mind is lost somewhere else. Suddenly the heat from the day isn't hot enough and I want him. His dark brown hair and olive skin glow in the sunlight, and I hope to the deepest of my heart that our son has none of my features. I want him to be a perfect imitation of the man before me now. To put any of my genes in there would spoil such a wonderful thing. I moan as his lips come up to meet mine passionately, and before I know it, I'm helping him get his shirt off too. Suddenly he's above me, one hand propping himself up on his elbow and one tracing patterns on my stomach, and then our mouths are joined again, and it's so amazing that I forget all about the fact that mere moments ago I was undressing to dip into the lake to cool down. I forget that we're in the middle of the woods, surrounded by only nature and each other. After all, it hasn't been the first time this will have happened. All too often we get caught up in a fit of longing in this very spot.
My hormones take over and soon it's all happening. Our faces never leave each other's but our bodies change, molding into one. And here we're free to make as much noise as we want, undisturbed. I press more firmly against him, if it's even possible, because I just want to be as close to him as I can, to feel our minds connect with each other as we move together. His breath is ragged as he continues to melt his tongue on mine and I become louder and louder as the sparks that were once inside of me, now become flames. Scorching flames that take us both under as it's captives. It doesn't last long as we both wanted it so much and so passionately, and soon Gale is murmuring my name over and over, and I breath his too as he falls to my side. He wraps his arms around me completely and kisses my ear, whispering how beautiful and I am, and how much he loves me. I smile and tell him my usual response.
"I love you back."
To this, he pulls my head onto his chest, and I can hear his thudding heart pounding through his thick skin. If we were sweaty before, we're doubly so now, but neither of us seem to care. He pushes a lock of hair behind my ear and uses the same hand to stroke softly down my back, the electricity still there but lying more dormant again.
"Now I'm kind of liking the hormones. They come in handy every now and then." I say playfully and he squeezes my shoulder lovingly.
The baby suddenly kicks sporadically, and I groan, knowing Gale can feel it too against his own stomach. He laughs and presses his lips to my forehead before looking down at the huge bump below us.
"Behave in there, you're hurting your mother." He coos gently in a special voice that is reserved only for talking to our unborn baby. It's softer and more melodic than his usual voice, and it always makes my pulse quicken at the sweetness of it. I press my lips gingerly to his chest.
"It's only because he probably has your feet as well." I moan as I move a hand between us to rub the spot on my stomach where he just thumped me. Gale guffaws at this before settling down again.
"You're probably right." He says back. " You know what? I can't wait until he's here with us. We can take him hunting, obviously you can do the archery training." He starts; his voice dreamy and distant. I smirk at his comment but let my head be filled with images of a brown haired, olive-skinned, gray-eyed boy as he skips between the trees, pulling back the arrow with ease and comfort as Gale claps his hands in pride when he hits a bird.
Gale sighs in contentment as I move a hand up to his chest, clutching onto his skin. "You'll be able to teach him perfect snares, don't worry." I whisper, gently patting him and he chuckles again.
"I know we don't talk about this Catnip, but I just want to say this one thing, and I'm sorry for bringing it up." He starts, serious suddenly, which makes my heart skip a beat. I can only presume that the one topic we never discuss is about to come up.
The past.
"It's okay." I say through a shaky voice, not wanting to spoil the moment. He takes a deep breath and I feel my head rise and fall with it.
"I can't tell you how good it feels to know that they're safe. No more games, no more Capitol-ruling. They never have to have their names thrown into that Reaping bowl, ready to be picked out by clowns." He almost spits the last word, but I can hear that behind the venom there is genuine happiness. I nod.
"Me too." I reply, and try not to think about the thing we're both thinking.
For now.
As I hear the Mockingjays twitter above me, and feel the heat sinking into my skin, a state of calm washes over me. My mind is taken back to when this part of mine and Gale's journey began, and another was ended for good with somebody else. It would always be a bittersweet day for me...
I paced the kitchen, waiting for Gale to return from some construction work he was doing in the town center with other locals. My heart felt like it was going to crumble as it hit my chest so violently, and my hands felt clammy with cold sweat. We both knew this was what was going to happen. We had stopped using protection, we'd agreed that this is where we wanted to go in life. It didn't make me feel any less ambiguous about the change though. Change was something I was never, ever good at dealing with.
Eventually the door clicked open and I heard Gale take off his boots and coat.
"I'm home!" He called, not knowing that I awaited him just around the corner.
"In here." I replied, my own voice quivering, and coming out a lot more vulnerable than I anticipated. I glanced one more time at the two sticks on the counter, checking this wasn't a dream as he rounded the corner and took in my state. He looked confused.
"Hey Catnip. Wait-" Gale pulled up his sleeve to look at his watch, confused. "What are you doing here Love? Weren't you meant to be meeting Sae?" He asked, stopping about a meter away from me, both of us nervous of the other in this moment, so distancing ourselves. I shook my head.
"I didn't feel very well this morning, so I told her I'd see her tomorrow instead. Only...I thought, I may...just...try, to see if..." The words were not coming to me, and I could see Gale was growing more anxious about the situation. The worse thoughts were probably coming into his head right now rather than the most logical. I continued, hoping he'd get it, not knowing if I could say the sentence I needed to say.
"You know I threw up about a week ago, and thought maybe I'd caught that bug off Delly? Well, I felt nauseous again today so I took...a test." I said the last word purposefully, raising my eyebrows so that he would get the message. He immediately realized and his eyes grew in anticipation. He saw out the corner of his eye the pregnancy tests resting on the counter, but I knew they were too far away for him to see the result. He froze, a small smile creeping onto his face.
"And...?" He pressed eventually when I didn't respond. I nodded, feeling a lump in my throat at seeing his excitement. This was the first time we'd tried, and we'd been successful already. I knew a lot of things could go wrong, but in that moment I suddenly knew that this was what I wanted; to have a baby with Gale.
"I'm pregnant." I managed to stutter out, and before I knew it, his arms were around my waist and lifting me up into the air as he bent his head slightly to plant a huge kiss on my stomach. I giggled, swatting him away and wriggling for him to put me down but I didn't care, not really. As I was placed back onto my feet, I looked into his replica of my eyes and saw a shining surface. He pulled me in for the longest kiss we'd ever shared, before breaking away and kissing me some more. I was crying and in fits of laughter when he'd finished.
"We're having a child together. I can't believe it." He gasped, as he kept me close in his embrace, not letting me go. This moment felt so definitive. I knew there and then this was meant to be, this was the path we were meant to take. No matter how scared I was, I had Gale.
"My" He started, kissing my forehead, "beautiful wife is carrying our baby." He finished as he kissed me again. Gale had never been so abundant with his kisses before; this was taking me off guard. We'd always been fairly reserved with our physical affection, until this point. I saw how elated he was, and felt a sense of purpose right here, right now as I saw that I was giving him one of the only things he ever wanted in life. To think I was the one that got to give him this kiss made my giddy with contentment.
"You're happy right?" He suddenly said, holding my face in his hands and studying my eyes. "You're okay with all of this?" He pressed again, and I wiped another tear.
"I want nothing more than to start a family with you." I murmured and rested my head under the crook of his neck and jawline, as he enveloped me once again. "I've never been happier." And it was the truth.
A week later, and the whole of 12 seemed to know our news. Gale had obviously been quick to tell everyone, wanting every single person to know that I was with his child. I didn't mind, not really. It had to come out sometime, and it was better to get the attention over with now, however I knew there was no way around what was to come. I couldn't avoid this. Not forever.
I pushed open the door, telling myself this would have to be like a band-aid, nice and quick. Rip it off and get all the pain over with in one. I knew that this would cause him agony, still after all this time. But I couldn't help but I wanted. Who I wanted. The truth was, he'd never be the same, ever. And it was too excruciating trying to make things work between us, when we both harbored such awful memories and experiences that we'd been through together. It would never work between us, no matter how much he wanted to try. I had to be selfish, after everything. I had to chose for myself.
The bell rung as I entered the bakery; the sweet scents half making me feel queasy, and half making me want to devour everything in the shop. He didn't look up from icing the cake he was holding, but spoke.
"I'll be with you in a minute, I'm just finishing-" His voice cut off as he glanced up and saw who stood before him.
Me.
"Oh Katniss. I didn't realize it was you." He muttered, and put the cake to the side, lying the icing tube down with it to give me his full attention. With every thud of my heart, I could feel his breaking. I felt heavy with guilt. Peeta would always hold a special place within me, but not the place he wanted.
"I just came to get some bread for Sae." I replied back, my voice thick with self-loathing. I glanced around in the glass counters, trying to occupy myself without giving away my true emotions, and trying to prolong the conversation that would eventually come up. He cleared his throat.
"You never come in here." He started; his voice steady now, and upset. I continued looking down. "Your husband usually comes." He said, and the hint of hatred was evident in his tone. I blinked back tears, not wanting this to happen. Eventually, my gaze flitted back up to him. His sandy blonde hair, and blue eyes the same as always, just...aged. My mouth fell open to talk but no words came out. Peeta Mellark always had me speechless these days on the odd occasion I bumped into him, and excused myself abruptly.
"Well I suppose now you're here I should take this time to say Congratulations shouldn't I?" He said, and all trace of sarcasm and bitterness was gone. His voice was almost hollow. The guilt swelled up in my chest. Peeta had never found anyone after me.
"Oh, you heard." I stated, knowing full well he would have. I realized then what I should have said in response, so added it on. "Thank you Peeta, that means a lot to me." My eyes met his and for a moment, it was like looking into the doors of the past.
"Can I have this one please?" I said suddenly, pointing to a wholemeal loaf nearest to me; I wanted to speed up this conversation now that it was happening. He reached out his hand into the display case, grabbing the bread from it's place and beginning to wrap it up for me.
"I'm glad you have it all Katniss. I always knew Gale was the one for you." He muttered, taking extra time with the packaging. I stood awkwardly, one hand rubbing my stomach as I was deep in thought. His eyes fell to it, and I immediately stopped; my face flushing red. The things he was saying to me...I had no way of answering them. I felt helpless. He eventually passed over the loaf, and I reached out my other hand to give him the coins. My skin brushed against his and I gasped at the touch. Instead of accepting them though, he pressed his fingers around mine so that my palm was enclosed by them, trapping the money. He shook his head, keeping his hand on mine.
"Tell Sae she owes me some of her infamous squirrel soup." He said, forcing a smile. I felt bad for taking the bread free of charge, it was something I hated: handouts. But this was more for his benefit than mine, I realized.
"Thank you Peeta." I replied, and though the both of us should have taken our hands away, we didn't. To have him as a friend in my life would never be enough for him, I saw that now, no matter how much I may eventually want that to be the outcome, long off in the future. This was the end; this baby had sealed the envelope of fate. It was time to say Goodbye. All this time it had been left slightly open for us, always having the possibility of maybe working past it. The last few years it had become more distant, but now this was it.
"Tell me you're honestly happy Katniss. That's all I ever wanted for you. And I promise, I'll be okay with it." He whispered, and the room went so silent that I could hear the clock ticking on the wall.
Tick tock.
I took a deep breath in, preparing for my voice to come out shaky and rattled as my fingers squeezed his.
Tick tock.
"I am." I concluded, and with tears in both our eyes, I broke apart our clasp, and left the shop, to return home to Gale.
My husband, the one I'd chosen, the one I loved.
