Disclaimer: I do not own Young Frankenstein, Inu-yasha, or Yu-Gi-Oh.

Young Doctor Von Yugisteine's Monster.

Act One: Scene One

It was a dark and stormy afternoon in lower Transylvania when Dr. Yami Von Yugistein was giving his daily lecture on the human anatomy in the Tokyo University of Medicine. As the professor of Humanities it was his obligation to introduce young future doctors to the human nervous system. His class looked on in absolute boredom as he walked back and forth in front of them in his white lab coat and used a great assortment charts and graphs to explain how the body's nerves and reflexes worked. Just when they all thought it couldn't get any worse, the janitors brought in the body. Yes an actual dead body (which closely resembled Tristan) was rolled into the lab there before them and displayed like a frog in a jar.

"This, class, is a prime example of what we call a none mobile entity. It is no longer alive and therefore it's nervous system is inert. Some theorize that it would be possible to reactivate a dead nervous system in a body, which has sustained as little decay as this one has. As you can see it has been preserved and is on loan to us from the Archeology department who will attempt to use this body in recreating the process of mummification." Dr Von Yugistein told them.

"Is it true Heir Doctor that your own grandfather once tried such an experiment, that is to say, he attempted the reanimate a dead body in his secret laboratory?" One of his students asked.

"That is a lie." Dr. Von Yugistein said. "A dreadful miss representation of the facts. While attempting to further the good of medical science my grandfather died in his lab at the hands of a mad man who'd broken in on him. Yes, I suppose you could say that he was murdered by a monster, but he was most certainly not trying to play God. I think this concludes today's class." He dismissed his class and the students all filed out of his classroom in single file and proceeded on to their next lecture while Dr. Von Yugistein put away his charts and graphs. Just as he was about to pack away his papers in his suitcase, a strange looking man in an out of date suit and a bowl hair cut walked up to him.

"Excuse me." The odd little man said, hunched over, and cleaning his wire rimed glasses. "Are you Doctor Yami Von Yugistein?" He asked in his slurred speech. Yami turned to him and looked the man over.

"I am." He replied, seeing no threat in answering the question.

"I am Weevel Underwood, attorney, and the executor of your late Grandfather's estate." The man said as he put his glasses back in front of his squinting eyes. "I have been instructed to give to you the following inheritance."

"Inheritance?" Yami asked.

"Yes, inheritance, you don't hear good do you? Me either, but when you get dropped on your head as a child, it happens. Along with sight, which you lose when you stare at the sun too long." The man fiddled around with his briefcase and papers for a moment until he came to what he was looking for. "Here we go. The deed to Castle Von Yugistein in upper Transylvania and your grandfather's diary. It's something of a mess what with it nearly being buried with him." He handed over the dirt covered book and the document. "There now, my job is done, and I can go home. Nice to meet you." The odd little man turned around and started out the door, which he missed, walking into the wall instead, After he shoock his head, he finally found the door, and left. Yami stood there for a moment looking at the deed and diary then he shouted to the odd man.

"Wait! What am I to do with an old Castle and this diary?" He asked.

"That's not my problem anymore." The odd little man shouted back from down the hall. "I'm just the messenger." He left Yami alone then to ponder over the strange inheritance that his grandfather had left him in the solitude of his empty classroom.

"Well." He said after a time. "I suppose that it couldn't hurt to at least visit the old castle and see what can be done with it."

---------------------------------------------------

Act One: Scene Two

The fog rolled into the train station and cast a dim shroud like the vale of death as Dr. Yami Von Yugistein and his fiancé Tea Gardner said goodbye to one another.

"I can't bare to be parted from you long my love." Tea said to him as he hung his head out through the train window. "Please hurry back to me or send word for me to join you as soon as possible."

"I will, and don't worry, we shant be parted long." They kissed passionately as the train whistle blew and before they knew it, the train was off. Tea stood at the platform waving until the train was of sight then Yami pulled himself back inside and closed the window. He hunkered down in his seat for the long trip to upper Transylvania.

-------------------------------------------------

Act One: Scene Three

Yami awoke with a jolt as the train screeched to a stop. People slowly began to shuffle off the train at it's stop in upper Transylvania. The mist began to surround everything when Yami exited the train at last. He stood on the platform, and looked down at the scrap of paper he held in his hand, and wondered where the man who was going to pick him up was. Then, he heard an eerie sound, like something lifeless and limp being dragged across the boards of the platform. Ami looked around, but didn't see anything because of the thick fog. Then, a cold, clammy hand grasped his shoulder. He yelled, and whirled around, holding up his cane and briefcase like a shield and sword.

"Chill, would ya," said the hunchback that stood before him. "You the doctor guy?"

"Oh, why, yes. I am Dr. Yami Von Yugistein." Yami said, extending his hand and shaking the hunchback's. "And who might you be?"

"I'm your butler. Joegore," said the strange fellow. He then removed his hood, revealing a fine head of thick golden hair.

"A pleasure," Yami said. "Are you the one who's taking me to the castle?"

"Sure am," Joer gore said, picking up the Doctor's bags. "The cart's over there. Sorry, but the motor car's in the shop."

"Oh, I see," Yami said, a little disappointed.

"Come on," Joergore said, draggin his gimpy leg and limping on the other one, "Walk this way." Yami shrugged, and also began dragging one leg and limping on the other.

Joegore threw the bags in the back of the hay cart, and then, gave Yami a hand into the back. As the young doctor flopped down in the hay, a voice from under it cried, "Ooh!"

"Excuse me," Yami said. He did a double take and then asked, "Wait who's under there?"

"Me," said a girlish voice then, the voice's owner popped out from under the hay. She was beautiful beyond belief, and very well developed. Her light brown hair, covered with misty dew, shimmered in the moonlight.

"Sis, what have I told you about playing back there?" Joegore scolded her from the driver's seat of the cart.

"I'm sorry, brother," she said innocently. Then, she turned back to Yami, and asked, "Would you like to roll in the hay with me?"

"What?" Yami exclaimed, his cheeks turning red.

"Roll, roll, roll in the hay!" the girl sang happily as they rode through the foggy streets.

"Don't mind Serenity," Joegore said. "She's a sweetheart, but not too bright. She got kicked in the head by a horse."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Yami said.

"Yeah, and that was just Monday." Joegore said. The singing and clopping of horse hooves continued until they finally pulled up to the gates of the old castle. The stony structure loomed on the hill, looking ominously ominous. Lightning flashed and thundered clapped. And a girl screamed.

"Sis, knock it off," Joegore said to his sister.

"I'm sorry," she whimpered. "I'm scared! Hold me," she cried, throwing herself into Yami's arms. The cart bumped on the cobblestones as they rode up to the immense wooden door of the castle. As Joegore helped Yami and his sister out of the back of the cart, the door opened with a loud creak. In the doorway was a tall, pale woman with hair as black as night tied up in a bun on top of her head. She stared at them coldly, and then turned to Yami.

"You are Dr. Yami Von Yugistein," her chilled voice said.

Yami coughed, and replied, "Yes. And you are…?"

"The house keeper," she answered him. "My name… is Kikyo!" Lightning flashed, the horses reared, and Serenity jumped up into Yami's arms, pressing her body against him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that," Yami said. "What was your name again?"

"My name… is Kikyo!" she said again. Lightning flashed, the horses reared, and Serenity grabbed Yami's head, pulling his face down into her bosom.

"Got it now?" the housekeeper asked.

"Yes, thank you," Yami's muffled voice said, lifting a thumbs up.

"Then walk this way," she said, floating across the floor, her back straight as a pin, her arms unmoving at her sides.

"I don't think I can walk that way," Joegore said peering through the door.

"Then just get bags," Yami said, carrying Serenity in with him. Joegore turned, and picked up the bags. Then, a thought entered his mind. He looked around, checked the sky. Not a cloud in sight. Then, he said quickly, "Kikyo!"

Lightning flashed, thunder clapped, and the horses bolted forward, taking the cart with them.

"Aw rats," Joegore said, "Lost another set." He smacked his lips, picked up Yami's luggage, and walked inside. The door shut behind him with a loud clang, like a death knell ringing.

AN: Gracious! We must be careful not to say 'Kikyo' (lightning flash, thunder clap, horses rear, woman screams!!!) See what I mean? Please review.