So, here's the first chapter of the follow-up to How Do I Start? I genuinely enjoyed writing this but when I was writing the flumpf (a word coined by the round-headed buffoon that is Karl Pilkington to describe soppy, emotional or cute things) parts, it felt like my liver was committing suicide. PM, review and let me know if you like this pairing.


"Well, Kevin, today's been shit."

"How shit?"

"The shittiest day of my life. You remember that Clyde wanted me to keep a secret from Kyle?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Kyle found out about it."

"How'd he take the news?"

"Pretty fucking well and the fucking's literal. I heard them dry-humping each other to orgasm on Clyde's couch."

"No way!"

"Yes way. It was fucking disgusting."

"Oh, my god, that must have been so super embarrasing!"

"In ways you can't even imagine."

"You just HAVE to tell me more about it. Come over to my house, we can talk in private."

"Okay, Kev. See you later. Love you."

"Love you too, Stanny."

Wow, it got dark quick. Stupid street lights, flicking on and off. They really should replace these, that one's still got Kenny blood on it. If those two got cum on Kyle's jacket, I'm gonna fucking kill them.

Kevin's always interested in anything I talk to him about. He's just so different. Butters really is a good matchmaker. I gotta thank him sometime.

I hate how far away from my house he lives. A whole 10 minutes of walking. It may not seem far but with my legs and my height, it's deadly. 6"2 and Kyle only hit 5"11. Clyde's about 5"9, 5"10. Kevin's only 5"8 but that makes it easier to pick him up and squeeze him.

He has to get on his tippy-toes to kiss me. Just thinking about him makes me smile.

Ah, here's his house. I can't believe his parents don't know he's gay yet. He acts gay, looks gay, sounds gay. They must be blind. His parents are always going on vacation. I think I've only met them like, once or twice.

Let me just use our secret knock...

KEVIN'S POV:

Let me start turning on the lights. Without my parents here, I sort of forget. Stan must be so grossed out. He's been friends with Kyle and Clyde for so long, hearing them do that must be so, like, yuck!

When me and Stanny do that, we at least have the decency to make sure our friends aren't right in the next room.

*THUMP THUMP TH-TH-THUMP* That's Stan! Ah! Crap, I gotta stop running down the stairs. Always hitting into the door. Stupid thing.

STAN'S POV:

That's Kevin hitting the door, as usual. Why doesn't he just slow down a little?

"Hey, Stan!" Fuck, for someone so small, his hugs are incredibly tight. "Hey, Kevin."

"Come on in, sit down on the couch."

"Okay." He forgot to turn on the lights again. It's almost like he just forgets everything when his parents leave. "Do you want something to drink?"

"Nah, I had half a beer at Clyde's before I left."

"Ooh, now we're down to the subject. Okay, tell me everything about it."

"Well, Clyde admitted he was gay and how he was gay for Kyle and Kyle asked if I could go out of the room for a few minutes."

"And?"

"I guess in the five fucking minutes I was out of the room, they got a little too friendly. I heard Clyde shouting and a few seconds later, Kyle just like, groaned really loud."

"Oh, my poor Stanny! You shouldn't have had to hear that."

I love it when he does this. When he kisses my neck it just makes everything better.

"I know, it was awful. Clyde said he would have a three-way with me if he could."

"Oh, Stan. How do you get yourself into these situations?"

"I don't know. I think it's 'cos I like to help people and I can't say no."

"That's my fault. Almost everything I ask, you say yes to."

"No, I don't."

"Stan, was that a lie?"

"...Yes."

"Told you."


I think that was a half-decent first chapter, don't you? Okay, I'll be continuing this soon, just waiting for inspiration to hit me. PM, review, all that sorta stuff.