A/N: Just an idea which sprang to mind when eating a real Chocolate Frog I bought from the Harry Potter Studio Tour(!) in London. I was going to apply it seriously, but decided James would probably do things a tad more romantically, and made it into a joke instead. Hope you like!

Disclaimer: I do not own Chocolate Frogs (well, I do, but I didn't think of them). Nor do I own Harry Potter, James Potter, Lily Potter or anyone else in the Harry Potter universe. I own this original plotline.


Snitched

or

An Alternate View on The Contents of a Chocolate Frog Box, Potter-Style

Lily Evans stared in disgust at the small, pentagonal box placed in front of her. It had just levitated to her place in the common room - a squashy red chair in front of the fire, to be precise – in the way that a feather might do, light and melancholy. Except, Lily Evans had just an inkling of who might be behind it, and 'light and melancholy' was most definitely not in his book of strategies to approach somebody.

Staring around the common room in scrutiny, she searched for the offender behind the monstrous crime. But, try as she might, her eyes failed her. Scowling, and feeling slightly apprehensive in case it turned out to be some stupid trick, Lily Evans took the Chocolate Frog box.

She opened it as nonchalantly as she could, as though she knew exactly what to expect. But the reality was, she didn't. She couldn't have expected this.

Inside the Chocolate Frog box was, not the usual solid chocolate in the shape of a frog, but a small, silver ring.

Lily's heart jumped right up into her mouth. She stared alarmingly at the open box as though it were some sort of time bomb. She wanted to snap it shut and stuff it beneath the cushion on her chair, but she couldn't. This wasn't...he couldn't be...ridiculous...

It's a joke, she told herself. It's just a typical joke, designed to make me think I'm actually being proposed to, or trick me into thinking the ring's real when actually it turns into a beetle or something equally stupid.

Not fully aware of her expression, but knowing that she must look as though she'd just seen a ghost, she picked up the ring with trembling fingers. It did not turn into a beetle. It didn't turn into anything. It winked all around the common room, reflecting sparkles of light from the glowing fire. She felt its presence was so great that surely everyone in the common room must be staring at it in awe, breathless by its beauty. And it was beautiful. Not too thick, not too thin. Not too showy. But not discreet enough that it wasn't special. Set into the outside of the ring was a perfectly round golden jewel, and on the outside of this was a small, feathery, elaborate wing on either side. It was a Snitch. A Snitch ring. I wouldn't expect anything less, she thought to herself ruefully. But all of her annoyance melted by just looking at it.

She peered at the box. At the bottom, where the Chocolate Frog card usually was, lay a small piece of parchment, cut pentagonal to fit. Not daring to put the ring on her finger, as she suspected it still carried some sort of enchantment, she peeled the parchment from the bottom of the box and read the handwritten scrawl.

Oh Lilith, I am your faithful Seeker and you my Golden Snitch, if you would only take my hand in marriage and accept this ring I crafted with my own nimble hands, I would have finally caught you and ended the long, endless game we play. Marry me and I will be happy for evermore.

She snorted and cringed, feeling slightly sick. She wasn't taking the note seriously right from the first word – this was, evidently, all just a joke.

Scowling at her naivety, she turned the parchment over to see what other soppy verse he had written.

Just joking, Evans, I'd sell my broomstick before getting lumbered with you for the rest of my life. But don't worry; you can keep the ring even though I'm not proposing to you (though I bet you wished I was, eh?). Seeing as it's your birthday coming up, I'm showing a little of my generous side. And I did make it myself, so think yourself lucky. But, be warned, though, that it has its own flesh memory just like a real Snitch – if anyone but you tries to wear it, they'll suffer a pretty nasty Stinging Jinx.

So Happy Birthday – and by the way, we've got a prefect meeting tomorrow.

She read the letter through several times, certain her eyes were deceiving her: first in a kind of revolted horror, then in disbelief, then in annoyance. And then, she felt slightly confused: why was arrogant berk, good-at-everything-and-not-at-all-modest-about-it James Potter, taking the time to give her a handmade ring for her birthday? Come to think of it, how did he even know it was her birthday? And how did he know about the prefect meeting before her?

Completely astounded by the sudden rush of what appeared to be – dare she say it – kindness shown by James Potter, she was left momentarily speechless and blank-minded. She realised with a jerk that she must look an idiot holding the box open in one hand with the parchment and ring in the other that she hastily shut everything back in the box as though trying to erase what had just happened to her. Then, looking determinedly around the common room as though determined to weed him out, she finally spotted him, his head bobbing between two second-years who jumped when they saw him as though he had just sprang spontaneously from nowhere.

A feeling of hot, sickly anger rose in Lily's stomach and she gripped the Chocolate Frog box and marched over to him with her freckled cheeks steadily glowing as red as her hair.

'Just what do you think you're playing at, James Potter?'

The two second-years, startled, scuttled away.

'Ah. You like the present, then?' James said pleasantly.

'How did you know it was my birthday?' she demanded suspiciously. 'And why are you sending me a present?'

'Well, Evans, it's the done thing for people to do when it's someone's birthday,' said James as though explaining a simple task to a slow person. 'They give them gifts, you see, to celebrate their becoming a year older. Obviously you've never had one before or y—'

'Stop being so pathetic, James, of course I've had birthday presents before,' she interrupted snappily. 'The question I'm asking is, why? Why would you give up your precious time to – to make me a ring with a skin memory or what ever the hell it is – '

'Bloody hell, Evans, and I thought you had brains?' James said sceptically. 'Flesh memories. Snitches have them – it means they know who was the first person to touch it, in case of a disputed catch. The maker even wears gloves so that the Snitch doesn't recognize them.'

'Oh,' said Lily in a small voice, now blushing even deeper. She did not like James knowing something she didn't – it gave her a very inferior, belittling feeling, as though the information was something that everyone ought to know, and it was made worse by the fact that it didn't happen very often. 'So, er – this ring – it's got a flesh memory just like a Snitch, has it?'

'Yes, Evans, it's what I wrote on the note,' James said flatly. 'Or, did you not read it?'

'No, I read it,' she said with a roll of her eyes. 'Even the stupid proposal part.'

'Got your hopes up there, did, you, Evans?' he asked her with a cheeky grin.

'No, I didn't!' she replied angrily. 'And I don't want your ring. Have it back.'

She pressed the Chocolate Frog box into his hand. He looked both scandalised and a little hurt. 'You can't do that!' he insisted. 'It's a present! It's free, you can't just give it back – '

'I already have,' she said dryly.

'How ungrateful of you!' he gasped dramatically. 'I worked tirelessly until midnight for weeks – '

'You shouldn't have,' she said sweetly. 'And I mean, you really shouldn't have.'

'Well I can't have it, how bloody stupid would I look wearing it?' he asked sceptically.

'Oh, give it to one of your many girl admirers, I'm sure they'll appreciate it,' she said carelessly, turning around to go back to her seat in the hope that one of the annoying first-years hadn't got there first.

'But – I can't – it's got your name on it!'

She turned around impatiently.

'Look, Potter, that ring could belong to anyone, okay, I haven't put it on so whoever wears it first will still have that stupid flesh memory thing - '

'No, I mean, literally – it has your name on it.'

'What?'

She paused. James rummaged in the box, hastily pulling out the ring, and thrust it right at her eyes. She shoved his hand further away, puzzled, so that her vision came into focus.

James was looking at her eagerly, waiting for her to comprehend, and in the dim light of the common room she couldn't quite see what he was getting at. It was just a Snitch...it didn't have her name on it...

But then, upon looking closer at the ring, she saw a tiny detail that she must have missed when seeing it for the first time: on the inside of the ring, etched into the silver, were the initials 'L.E'.

'Well,' she said hoarsely after a large and rather awkward pause. She cleared her throat. 'That could mean anything. It doesn't have to be my name. It could mean, "Logical Explanations". Or "Lilium Eupetes", which is the scientific name for a species of lily. Or – '

'Stop prattling about, Evans, you know exactly what it means,' James said sharply. 'And why in the name of sweet Salazar do you know the name for a species of lily? Who'd be that sad?'

'My granddad has an encyclopaedia of flowers and herbs, actually,' she said matter-of-factly. 'It's not my fault that there was nothing better to do at his house than read it.'

'No wonder you turned out to be so boring,' James said with a raise of his eyebrows. 'So, are you going to take the ring, or not? I did put a lot of effort into that ring, you know. The Flesh Memory Charm was bloody difficult to do. I know you don't like Quidditch that much, but, well, I thought I'd give that unique James Potter touch to it, you know - '

'Unique is one way to put it,' she said under her breath. She was still determinedly avoiding the fact that it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her, though it was staring her right in the face. But she would never admit that to him, of course.

'Come on, Evans. It's probably the nicest thing anyone's ever done for you, and you know it.'

Suddenly seized with the absurd notion that James could read minds, Lily panicked and studied the ring instead to avoid looking at him. She knew eye contact was an essential part of Occlumency, and she was taking no chances. Then she realised she was being completely stupid. Like she always was when she was around James Potter. And though she hated to think it, she wanted nothing more than to slip the ring on her finger and dance around the common room to admire it by the light of the crackling fire.

But she was Lily Evans, and she stood her ground.

'How do you know that someone hasn't done anything nicer for me?' she asked dubiously.

'If they had, you wouldn't be still stood talking to me now,' James said simply.

He could read minds, she thought in a panic. Either that, or he just knew her inside out after six years, which was strange since they were hardly friends. In fact, it was probably the latter. She doubted whether James had the patience or desire to learn Occlumency.

'Okay,' she said finally, trying to act grudgingly. 'I'll accept the birthday present. But only because it's my birthday, and because I'd seem like an ungrateful sod if I don't.'

'You certainly would,' James smiled. He passed the Chocolate Frog box back into her hand. 'So, it's yours then. Happy Birthday.'

'It's not until next week,' she reminded him. 'And you still haven't answered my question about how you knew.'

'Mary Macdonald told me,' James said with a careless wave of his hand. 'She's the centre of gossip around this place, you know. She knows everything.'

'Even about prefect meetings?' Lily enquired suspiciously.

'Oh, no, it was McGonagall who told me that,' James grinned. 'She cornered me after I was coming back from a detention last night. She says that Rosier hasn't been doing patrols for the past two weeks, so we need to talk to him about that – well, I suggested a good kick up the arse, but she said that would be - '

'That would be an unwise example to set as Head Boy, yes,' I finished sternly. 'What were you doing detention for? Was it for setting off a Filibuster's firework in our Transfiguration class, and don't tell me otherwise because I knew that was you - '

'I was in the library after hours looking up on how to engrave on silver, actually,' James said coldly. Lily's face suddenly grew hot and she felt a strange, swooping feeling in her stomach. 'You know,' James continued casually. 'Silver. Silver rings, in fact. I couldn't quite decide if I wanted to engrave initials on the jewel or the inside of the ring, so - '

'Engraving on the jewel would have been harder to do,' she said instantly. 'It's smaller so you have to be more precise with your Gouging Spell - '

'Yeah, I know that now, don't I?' asked James a little defensively. 'And no, it wasn't me, Evans. It was Sirius. It was tempting to involve myself, trust me...but I'm Head Boy now and I've got to start behaving, haven't I?' He pulled a face as though managing to last through a single lesson without getting into trouble was a tedious, difficult feat.

'Wow,' Lily said with a raise of her eyebrows. 'I'm impressed. You really are taking this seriously! I mean, at the beginning of the year you were lacking a little' – James snorted – 'but you're not missing meetings any more, at least.'

'I wish I was,' James muttered. 'They're about as boring as a double History of Magic lesson. How do you stand them, Evans?'

'I have this little thing,' Lily began, 'called tolerance.'

'My arse you have!' James scoffed. 'Yeah, all right, you can sit for a few hours with all the other little prefects and talk about duties...doesn't mean you're tolerant. You don't have much tolerance with me, do you?'

My temper rising, I said, 'It would be hard to find someone who does have tolerance for you, James Potter, not counting your group of friends, who are just as immature and difficult as you are. With the exception of Remus, who is actually half-decent,' she added thoughtfully.

'I'll take my ring back, then,' James replied shortly.

'I thought you said you can't have it back because it has my name on it?'

'Well, yeah, but you're obviously not grateful - '

'- I am, I'm just merely making a point that - '

'- That I'm "immature" and "difficult", was it? Yeah, I thought so - '

'– Well, you are, and don't try to deny it - '

'– I wasn't trying to deny anything, unlike you - '

'Unlike me?' asked Lily suddenly, so startled she forgot to sound angry.

'Yeah, unlike you,' said James. 'You're in a period of denial, Evans, and I can prove it because you're just about to deny it now.'

Lily waited in silence. She was not about to let James Potter get the better of her.

'You're Head Girl, you spend most of your time studying, you're good at just about everything and you'd probably ask for extra homework if you had more hours in the day to do it. You're an insufferable know-it-all.'

Lily still did not say anything, although she was slightly stung by what he was saying. She feared she was going to start going into a boiling rage if she opened her mouth, so she kept it shut.

'You watch me and my friends like you're above that sort of stupid stuff that we do. You maintain that we're immature and we need to act our age, not our wand lengths. But in reality, Evans, you wish you were one of us. You're fierce and funny and ambitious but you just don't have the guts to actually be what you want.'

'You don't know anything about me, Potter,' she stated. 'And I would never wish that I was included in your little group. I'm happy keeping out of trouble and actually doing well at school, thanks.'

James screwed up his eyes in dismay; he evidently thought he was fighting a losing battle. 'Ah, but as dear Padfoot would say, getting in trouble is only half the fun of what you got in trouble for.'

She raised her eyebrows. 'What a meaningful quote.'

'Sirius has said many,' James nodded fondly.

'What a shame I haven't heard any of them,' Lily retorted dryly. 'Anyway, if you've quite finished insulting me on my cowardice to join you in your group of who-wants-to-be-the-biggest-pain-in-the-arse, I'm going to go back to my chair and read.'

'Oh, how predictable,' James drawled. 'Let me guess – an Ancient Runes textbook? No, it's Head Girls of Hogwarts! Wait – is it a book Slughorn's lent you?'

'It's The Bell Jar and yes, it's a Muggle book,' Lily said over her shoulder.

'Sounds enthralling,' James said flatly.

Lily flopped down onto her gratefully vacant chair. She still had the ring in the Chocolate Frog box, but she didn't put it on; on the contrary, she made a point of placing the box on the wooden table, so James would see that she was not as desperate as he thought she was. Flicking back to her place in The Bell Jar with her legs curled around her like a cat, she settled back down to continue reading, although her mind wasn't on the book much and she found that she was reading the same sentence over and over again. She was still distracted about what James had said to her...she wasn't in denial...how dare he...

And had he really spent so much time making her a ring? Or was he merely saying it to sound impressive and make her feel guiltier should she refuse it? Lily kept glancing upwards to spot James and see if he was watching her, but, try as she might, she couldn't find him. She knew he'd been by the notice board just seconds ago, and now he wasn't...it was like he'd just disappeared. He couldn't have gone up to the boys' dormitories, because she was sat near the staircase, and would have surely seen him.

When The Bell Jar could no longer capture her attention, she slammed it down in frustration and then picked up the Chocolate Frog box. She looked at the design of the packaging. She read the note twice, on both sides. She picked up the ring and ran her little finger around the inside of it so she could feel the grooves of the Gouging Spell which made up her initials. All the while, she was fighting the temptation to put the ring on. She would not do it. She couldn't wear a ring given to her by James Potter. Her friends would go berserk, for a start, and take it to mean that she fancied him. Which she didn't.

She tentatively slid the ring halfway down the index finger of her left hand, but decided it would look better on her right. Thank Merlin it was too big for her ring finger, or else it would have looked a tad too suggestive. It fit perfectly on her right index finger. Making sure no-one else was looking, and feeling incredibly stupid, Lily held her hand out and admired the ring which glittered there, tilting her hand so she could view it from all angles.

On the other side of the common room, James Potter pulled off his Invisibility Cloak and smiled.