Chapter One: An Interesting Turn of Events


"Max, could you handle the phone for a second?" asked Anne, the secretary at my mom's local clinic. "I have to sign for a package at the back door."

"Sure, no problem," I replied, taking her seat at the front desk. She thanked me before hurrying down the hall and disappeared through the back exit. She's not my favorite person in the world, but taking over her job every once and a while is totally awesome. She has this cushy chair that spins around. And last year I found a chocolate stash in her top drawer. It beats sorting medicine shelves anyway.

Briiiiing.

Shit. That's the phone. I totally suck at answering phones. Well, here goes nothing. "Um, hello?"

"Hi," said a nervous voice. It sounded really familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. "Is this Dr. Martinez's Health Clinic?"

"Yeah-um, yes. How can I help you?" I pinned the phone between my ear and shoulder, searching the desk for a sticky note or something.

"Oh, I was just…um, this is really embarrassing, but…" Oh great. It was one of those people. I mean, really. We're a health clinic. The whole point of it was really embarrassing. Get over it, girlie. "Do you think that I could get…um, a…a test for…p-pregnancy."

I rolled my eyes. This girl really needed to get a grip. "Sure, I'll just need your name and age."

There was a pause. "Um…" the poor girl sounded close to tears now, "Lissa Richardson. I'm sixteen." My jaw dropped. My hand slipped off a stack of notecards and knocked over a jar of thumb tacks. They scattered all over the floor. That was going to be messy to clean up. But I had bigger things to deal with at the moment.

Lissa Richardson was head cheerleader, class president, and the most bitchy, popular, and beautiful female of my high school. And she was pregnant? Ouch. Sadly, I couldn't say it was totally unexpected. She is dating that total slim-ball Nick "Fang" Parker. He's a disgusting perv. And I know for a fact that the only reason he went out with her in the first place was to get into her pants. Which, apparently, he totally succeeded in.

"Oh, um…wow, sure. How does 4:30 tomorrow sound?" Tomorrow was Monday, the only day she didn't stay after school for presidential meetings or cheering practice or whatever.

"Sure," she said quietly. I was almost positive I heard a sob before she hung up. Even though she's made my life hell since sixth grade, I couldn't help feeling sorry for the poor girl. That was a really tough position to be in. But for some unknown, out-of-the-blue protective reason, I really wanted to punch that Fang kid in the face.

"Max, any messages?" asked Anne. She approached the desk, but she didn't have any packages. Weird.

"Oh, yeah, a girl's coming in for a preggers test tomorrow at 4:30," I said, getting up out of the awesome chair and walking out from behind the desk.

Anne frowned. "Max, it's pregnancy test. You should be more respectful. You have no idea what that poor girl must be going through." Anne shook her head, taking back her place at the desk, the lucky duck. "It's her own fault, though. So many young people are sexually active these days…"

And that's my queue to leave.

For the rest of the afternoon, I just sort of hung out doing odd jobs since all the new shipments of aspirin and stuff had been sorted and shelved already, courtesy of moi. For example Angel, this little girl who lives next door to me, came in for a shot and I held her hand. Afterward I gave her a lollipop and a sticker of Hello Kitty. I babysit her and her brother, Gazzy, every other Friday night when their parents have 'Date Night'.

It's really fun, actually. It beats getting felt up and wasted at high school parties, anyway. Last Friday we watched Tangled. I'm not one for Disney, but I have to say that this was one kick-butt kids' movie. Afterward, we always act out the movies. Angel, of course, was Rapunzel, Gazzy was Flynn, and I was, of course, Mother Gothel. I can't sing worth crap, but I did my best on the "Mother Knows Best" number for Angel's sake. She's just so dang cute as Rapunzel.

Anyway, Mom let me go home early since I had to study for a Spanish quiz tomorrow. I threw my messenger bag over one shoulder and flipped my skateboard up with one foot, carrying it to the curb of the clinic's parking lot before setting it down. Mom doesn't like me riding it near the streets, but what she's doesn't know can't hurt her, right? Right.

Even worse, I listen to my iPod while riding. Totally unsafe, but do I care? Hell no. I'm a carefree teenager with everything to lose. Screw safety. Unfortunately, I can't say the same Lissa. And boy, is she gonna be pissed when she finds out that the school's total reject/loser is the only one who knows she's pregnant. I have the outcome of her high school future in the palm of my hands.

Oh, I'm feeling the power. No, wait, that's just my cellphone. I put it on vibrate when I was working. It was Nudge.

"Hey, Nudge. What's up?" I pulled out my ear buds as I turned onto my street with the help of the street sign reading Maple.

"You'll never guess what happened today!" she hollered. I winced, and held the phone away from my ear.

"Jeez, Nudge. Blow my eardrum, why don't you." She just laughed.

"Sorry, I can't help it. But I have to tell you about this. I just have to. You'll never believe it." I'm guessing she was still at the hair salon where she works part time. I could hear old-lady laughter in the background.

"Okay, so what is it?"

"Well, I was walking to work, and guess who I saw walking around town?"

"Bigfoot?"

"No, Max, I saw Him." I rolled my eyes, even though she couldn't see me. Nudge refers to her crush as Him. It's ridiculous.

"Nudge, you're getting this worked up over just seeing Dylan?" Dylan Walker was this really creepy dude that sits next to me in Bio. Yeah, he's got that pretty-boy thing going with his wavy blond hair and perfect teeth, complexion, abs, the works. Anyway, he'll just stare at me all through class. It doesn't matter what I'm doing or what's going on in class. At first I thought there was something on my face, but it's just weird. And, of course, that's the only class Nudge isn't in.

"Come on, Max. You have to admit he's totally hot." There was a pause, and more old-lady laughter.

"Nude, you shouldn't just go by looks."

She scoffed. "Please, Max, you sound like my mom, and anyway, you're just saying that because of Sam." I winced. I'd forgotten about that, or at least I'd tried to. No thanks to Nudge. Sam had been my boyfriend for exactly one week, I dumped him after that 'cause he totally tried to cock a feel. He was a total jackass.

"Nudge, I was trying to forget about him."

"Oh, right, sorry. But anyway, he was skateboarding, and he waved at me. Can you believe it? It was the awesomest thing ever. I can't even begin to-"

"Nudge, awesomest isn't even a word."

"Whatever, Max. I'll see you on Monday, okay? Charlotte just came in for a root touch-up. Bye." She hung up. I sighed, stuffing the phone back in my pocket and putting my ear buds back in. Tomorrow would sure be interesting.

But when I got home, thoughts of tomorrow were totally erased from my mind. The cutest Scottish-looking puppy trotted up to me, a blue bow attached to its collar. I crouched down and patted its head before opening the card that was attached to his collar as well. Happy belated birthday, Max! It was from my Dad. He was always away on business, but...wow. He usually got me an iTunes gift card or something. Not that I was complaining. I kept reading. I'm so sorry I couldn't make your birthday party, so I hope this will help you forgive me. His name is Total.

Total. That's kind of interesting. But really cool. "Total," I said, and the dog baked, happily waving its tale. This was awesome. I should probably take him out or something. After a bit of searching around the living room, I found his leash. Picking him up, I carried him a couple streets over to this little park that a lot of people walk their dogs at. I set Total down, and he started sniffing, his tail still wagging.

I walked to the edge of the park with him, where the low-cut grass ended and a small forest started. It was almost impossible to pick through. And if you tried to get something from it, it was guaranteed that you would return with more than a few scratches. Anyway-

Thunk.

Something wacked me in the back of the head. I football bounced around me feet. I picked it up and turned around, coming face to face Fang Parker. Lovely. "Mind tossing that back?" he asked, grinning. "Oh, wait, that's right. Aren't you that girl who got kicked out of Gym for shitty aim?"

He's right. Only it wasn't for shitty aim. I hit Lissa with that baseball on purpose. But I wasn't about to tell that to her boyfriend. Especially not now, because of certain current events. And then I got mad again. His face just screamed out for a swift kick. But he could probably crush my skull if he wanted to, which would totally suck, so I thought of something milder.

"No, I can throw it," I assured him. "Back up a little bit."

He raised his eyebrows. Then his friend, Iggy, I think it was, who had jogged to stand beside Fang, started to laugh. "Yeah, right."

But then Fang spoke up. "No, let her throw it." He backed up a bit. Man, this was going to be easier than I thought.

"Just a little bit more," I said, making a pushing motion with my hands. "I throw really far." This made that Iggy dude laugh harder. What an asshole. "Little bit more…just there! Right there." I clamped the football between my hands. "Ready?"

"Any time now, sweetheart," Fang called. Ew. What a jerk.

I drew back my arm, ready to throw, and Fang and Iggy got ready, but at the last minute and spun my heel and chucked the ball as deep in the forest as possible. They would never see that poor thing again. And even before I could see their faces, which I'm sure were priceless, I grabbed Total's leash. "RUN, TOTAL!" I hollered. "EVERY CANINE FOR HIMSELF!"

I can't believe it. They were chasing me. Two junior boys were chasing me. What was this? Kindergarten? Well, whatever it was, it was flipping scary. I was a pretty fast runner, but I hadn't been on the school football team for three years, which put me in a really crappy place next to Fang and Iggy. But, on the other hand, I was a girl, a smart girl, who could worm her way out of any sticky situation. Including this one.

I scooped Total up in my arms while running (Not an easy thing to do.), and chanced a quick look back in their direction. They were gaining on me. Crap.

Then I got an idea. It was one of those split second live or die ideas. Was it a sensible idea? No. Was it a sane idea? Hell no. But a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. "Dylan!" He turned around and smiled a freakishly blinding smile. I swear he uses whitening strips. "I need your skateboard."

He looked taken aback. "What?"

"Pronto, dude. Get a move on!"

"Uh, okay. Why-"

I grabbed the skateboard he'd held out to me. "No time! Thanks, though. I'll get it back to you later!" I tucked Total under one arm, threw down the board, and took one glance at Fang and Iggy, who had stopped running by now and were just watching me, before stepping on the board and plunging into traffic.

I heard someone yell. It sounded like Fang, but I couldn't be sure. I was too busy trying not to die. But then it was all over. I managed to get a hold on a bumper of a car, and it started to pull me, Total, skateboard, and all, towards home.

Never say I wasn't resourceful.


Disclaimer: Let's be serious. If I owned the books, Fang would be dating me.

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Peace, Love, and FanFiction,

~Snickuhs