Of Elephants and Coffee

An AU one-shot based after the swing scene in Rise. Prompted by Meg (Castle_in_CA).


It's hanging in the air, forcing her heart to tighten, squeezing the breath from her lungs. She can practically see the five tons of elephant mass squished into the corner booth the string bean of a hipster in a greasy knit cap has just abandoned.

He's just staring into his lukewarm coffee now- Castle, not the elephant- having fallen silent from the ramble of random topics he's made his way through. She's interjected with small quips and offered shy smiles but he's the talker of the two them. At least some things never change.

The words are there, she can feel them, stuck in the back of her throat threatening to both choke her and fall from her tongue. Silence shrouds them, separates them from the murmurs and fragments of unintelligible conversation.

"So..." The word drags from his lips as Castle spins the mug by its porcelain handle, a slow circle in place.

"I..." She starts at the same time and stops on a small laugh. It's hard, this is hard. They've never been this hard before.

When it's clear she's not going to continue, his voice breaks the silence again. "So, I-"

"I heard you."

The words blurt out, a decibel too loud, drowning out the crowds of people around them in the small mainstream coffee shop, and his cup stills on the table, his hand trembling around it. "What?"

"I, um, I just-" Her knee jiggles, the instinct to flee coursing through her veins, her adrenal glands throbbing to be called to action. On a slow breath her hands fist in her hair and she forces herself to still. She can feel the eyes on her. His. The elephant's. She can do this. She has too.

"I lied before when I said I didn't. I did. I heard. And I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"I see."

His tone has her lifting her head in time to see him rise from his seat.

"Wait! Where are you going?" She pushes out of her chair, hovering as he throws some bills on the table and the elephant hangs its head as it sighs.

"I don't need your apologies, Kate. I don't need you to be sorry that you don't feel the same way."

"That's not what I'm saying."

"Well, that's what it sounds like to me." The words slam into her like a cup of ice water thrown into her face and she reaches out, her hand grasping at his elbow.

"Would you just stop and listen?"

"Fine." He shakes her hand off but settles back into his seat, his arms crossing in challenge.

"I'm sorry," she begins again, the words soft as she stares down at her hands. "That I lied to you. I should have told you I heard but I didn't."

"Why?"

"I told you, Castle. On the swings. I just need..." Her hands wring as she searches for the right words. They've always been his gift, not hers. The pen to her sword. Different sides of the same coin- that's what her mother would have called them. Two parts of a whole cleaved in half. "...time."

He rocked forward in his chair, hands running through his hair as his elbows thudded to the tabletop, in beat with the rhythm of her heart pounding in her ears.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah, okay." His worn eyes rise to meet her disbelieving ones and his fingers reach out to brush the back of her hand- a whisper of a touch that sent a quiver down her spine. "When that happened, when you were lying there- I promised that I would give anything to have you alive, to have you stay with me, and I can give this. I can give you time."

He pushes out of his chair once again and her fingers curl up around his as he leans over the table. His lips brush along the jut of her cheek bone before settling over her ear. "I love you, Kate."

And then he's gone, gathering his belongings, leaving her with her thoughts. Her time.

"See you tomorrow?" She calls as he turns toward the door.

"Always." He replies, before being swept through the crowded streets of the city. A smile blooms on her face, mirrored by the elephant before it disappears taking the weight from her heart with it.