A/N: To celebrate the end of The Ink Awards, I have written a silly little oneshot. Hope you enjoy (and review), dearies.
Dear Dustfinger,
I feel you should know you are starting to give me the "No" feeling. I'm very uncomfortable with you following me around while I perform my daily chores and errands. I appreciate the thought, but I do not need a personal escort following me in the shadows at the dead of night. And I'm quite comfortable and safe in my bed, than you very much. No need to watch me sleeping through my window. Oh, and I've asked Mo to board it up and check the house locks, just so you know.
I also want you to know that I've started going to see a therapist. You see, Dustfinger, I've become a little paranoid ever since you started following me around. I dress in my tiny closet now, just in case you're watching me, and I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
Resa says she thinks you fancy me. This upsets me. I'm not sure if you realize this, Dustfinger, but back in the real world, this is called pedophilia. It's greatly frowned upon.
And what would Roxane think of you fancying me? After all, she is your wife. The woman you had two children with. Remember her? I'm sure she'd be upset if you left her for a seventeen-year-old.
I'd love to remain friends, Dustfinger, but I think we should keep our distance.
I'm getting a restraining order.
Meggie
