More r-rated horror from the mad cat demon. Reading FF7 horror fanfics, very gory one, decided to write one myself! Wheee! Die, Cloud, DIE!! Sephy, he won't die! T.T Warning! Sudden Dismemberment Ahead! And lots of it!! Sort of AU, yes? Very very gory, yes? I need my head examined, yes?

A lone crow flapped from a tree and away into the night.

Blood dripped down the gleaming blade. The turquoise eyes that glowed their evil glow stared at the lifeless corpse. The silver hair moved slightly in the light breeze. The grass was visible through the hole in the body's chest, staining the grass and blue SOLDIER uniform deep red. His heart was vaguely visible.

"Sephiroth?" she said. He turned his eyes on her. Those eyes that she could stare into forever…. "So you finally killed him?"

He turned away. "Yes, Rin. Cloud Strife is now dead." Rin smiled, and walked up next to him, to stare at the corpse. She grinned, baring her many fangs. The blood stained the spiky hair that so resembled a chocobo's backside red. Her right wing snaked out to wrap around Sephiroth.

"At last, the annoying idiot is dead and gone!" she cried joyfully. "It took him ever so long to die! His head is too hard…. Oh well. He's dead now. We no longer have to worry."

"Yes…" Sephiroth said absently. He was still staring at the steaming corpse. Cloud's formally glowing eyes were staring directly at her beloved. The trickle of blood from his mouth was starting to pool on the ground now. Sephiroth tore his gaze from the bleeding body to look at her.

"Now I can feast on his flesh," she said. "I can gnaw on his bones and drink his blood. Then I shall dine on his heart, a perfect finish to a perfect dinner." She looked at Sephiroth. "Unless you want some…"

He shook his head. The light from the moon danced on his hair, a mesmerizing sight. "All for you, my love," he said. She smiled, as Sephiroth reached up to stroke the wing wrapped around his arm.

"Chocobo-head should taste very good, don't you think?" Rin said gleefully. Their laughter rang through the hills and valleys, mingling with the cries of two crows from a tree. One for sorrow, two for joy indeed.

Sephiroth and Rin entered the inn, where they knew Cloud's companions Aeris and Tifa to be staying. The others had not quite arrived yet. They looked at them. Rin heard a crow cawing at someone or something. She cared not.

"What do you two want?" asked Tifa. She did not notice the blood on the corner of Rin's mouth. Sephiroth drew his bloodstained sword. Tifa noticed, and went a little pale.

"Where's Cloud?" asked Aeris. Sephiroth and Rin said nothing. They merely grinned. Rin drew her blade, the large butcher knife dubbed Nurasaki. The other two paled noticeably.

They never saw the arrival of their friends, as their heads were probably trying to figure out how to get back to their bodies. If severed heads thought of such things. If severed heads thought at all.

Rin swirled the glass of Aeris' blood around. "How shall we deal with the others?" she asked, taking a drink. Aeris' blood tasted the best. Much better than Chocobo-arse's, anyway. She noticed Sephiroth was remarkably tolerant of her demon tendencies and… preferences.

"Kill them too, I guess," he said shrugging. Rin gestured towards Tifa's headless body.

"One of your finer works, I think," she said. "The blood spurting from the jugular vein was quite impressive. An excellent show."

Again their laughter rang through the area, awakening a pair of crows, who rose into the air, squawking.

One for sorrow, two for joy.

Masamune: Yes, I think Cloud's head looks like a chocobo arse, and yes, I wish Sephy would just kill him. By the way, when my penname doesn't coincide with the author character, the author character is just a character, nothing special. No author powers, like this (makes a pirate flag appear out of nowhere). Oh, how I love author powers. So convenient.

SD Sephiroth: Masa-chan! Masa-chan!

Masamune: Yes, Chibi Sephiroth muse?

SD Sephiroth: There's a horde of Cloud, Tifa, and Aeris fans trying to bust down the door!

SD Ansem: Masamune-sama! Masamune-sama!

Masamune: SD Ansem? I didn't call you! You're in the wrong fic!

SD Ansem: There's a mob of rabid, horny, and insanely jealous Sephiroth fangirls that want your head!

SD Sephiroth, Normal Sephiroth, Rin, and Masamune: WHAT?? WTFWTFWTF?!?!?!

(Masamune dons steel armor and picks up saber)

Masamune: I'm ready for 'em!

SD Sephiroth: Can you fight in that? I would think it would decrease your agility.

Masamune: (looks at armor) You're right. (Spins around till armor falls off) I have one word for all of you: RUN!!

(Everyone scatters as the fans break down the door. A few hours later, when the coast is clear, Masamune reappears.)

Masamune: They gone? Good! I'll update this if I get plenty of reviews for this blood-soaked piece o' crap. Flames welcome, cuz I know there's improvements to be made here somewhere... hmm....

Random fan 1: There she is!!

Random fan 2: Get her!!

Masamune: Oh, geez!! (runs away)