Okay. My first fanfic… It's going to be a depressing short one-shot. SCRATCH THAT . EXTREMELY SHORT ONE-SHOT.

forgot.. DISCLAIMER : I DO NOT OWN DEGRASSI . NOR DO I OWN THE CHARACTERS USED IN THIS STORY .

SO HERE IT IS.

It has been exactly 1 year since he left.

One year since he left to go live with his uncle in the states, leaving me all alone. After my family was torn apart, he promised me that I was stuck with him and that he was stuck with me. I guess I pictured stuck together like crazy glue, when he thought more of like a post it. Unstick it and throw it away in the garbage and restart with a new one once you were done with it.

365 days. I don't know how, but I've managed to keep myself together for that long. Probably not at the beginning but now, it's like he has never existed. Forgetting him was the last thing I've ever wanted, but remembering our moments spent together just caused more pain. Happy moments spent with him caused the most pain, because I knew I could never relive them or even be happy like I used to be. But i never talked to anybody about him. Nor did anybody dar try to bring his name up in fear of another breakdown.

Adam. Adam Adam Adam… He is the best friend you can ever have. The first few months, I was very fragile and he was always there. I could ball my eyes out for hours and he would just sit there with his arms around me trying to comfort me. Now a days, I was doing better, but I can still tell that he still has his eye open for me. As if he was worried I would break down any minute. I thought he was being ridiculous.

I was in English. my least favourite class. It used to be my favourite class, but things change and so do interrests.. RIGHT? Mrs. Dawes was handing out the essays we handed out last week and asked if anybody would read theirs to the class. Adam stood up and for some reason, my heart was beating UNCONTROLLLABLY fast. He look directly at me :

" Last week, Mrs. Dawes asked us to write about what was on our mind. And so well… umm... Here it is…:

Some people are afraid of silence. Not Silence itself, but what can happen during that time of silence. Well you see… When they're moments of silence we tend to think deeper, as if we dig right to our souls and start to think and question our life and decisions we have tthink about our emotions and how we really feel. Not the emotion or feelings that we reflect to others but the one we keep bottled up for a certain reason.

Some people are scared of silence because they are scared to think deeper… Because for some, that is an extremely fragile place. So they keep themselves occupied hoping that it would harden and wouldn't be as fragile. But said people don't ever think deeper and test it out and see if it has hardened because well, they are scared. So they never really know … They just hope it would heal.

So I guess that basically what I mean is that you can't be afraid of what truth or past scene you are trying to avoid, because no matter what you do to avoid the pain, by the end of the day it will always be there. I understand that facing reality may be horrifying but you always have to remember that they're people around you that you can talk to about it. Bottling it all up and keeping it to yourself isn't healthy. It's only a matter of time that all the questions you are afraid to face are pouring out uncontrollably. Keeping a strong face and faking to be just fine is useless because the people that truly care about you see right through that fakeness and see how sad and vulnerable you really are. Those people just don't say anything in fright that they might be pushing things too fast. So you need to speak up, so those people know you are ready and strong enough for the ride. "

Well .. What did you think ?. I know the essay doesn't make much sense.. But I tried right? HAHA! Well I'll try to make my next one FLUUUFFYYYY :D REVIEW please. (: