Chapter Title: My Past, My Present and My Future…

Summary: Izaya is depressed over everyone's hate for him and he can't take it anymore so… he decides to just… die.

This… was actually written a long time ago and proofread by Vanilla and Wolf… I don't think they remember this. I didn't post it because I was always thinking about whether it should be a one-shot or not… but I've just decided to leave it at this.

Enjoy the pain people. Haahh…


DISCLAIMER: I do not own Durarara


"You worthless piece of shit."

"You can't do anything right."

"Nobody loves you."

"Nobody wants you."

"Nobody cares about you."

"You're useless."

"Trash!"

"You should just go die!"

Izaya jolted up into a sitting position. He found himself on his king-sized bed in his condo in Shinjuku.

The raven haired man glanced at his digital clock. It was 5:18am.

'Another nightmare…'

Izaya groaned before sliding off his bed, his feet coming into contact with the soft red carpet. He just wanted to sleep but whenever he had that nightmare, he couldn't, in fear of more agony.

'No, it wasn't a nightmare…'

Izaya stared out of the floor-length window and he looked down upon his precious humans, it was a one-sided love he had for them. His lips curved into a sad smile, as his eyes travelled across the first rays of the morning sunrise.

"It's my past, my present… and it is my future…"

'That's right, nobody loves me… nobody cares about me…'

Izaya turned to face his room, his crimson eyes scanning the red and white furniture until he found what he was looking for, a rope.

'You should just go and die'

Izaya had had those words thrown at him numerous times, and to be honest, he had thought of it for a long time. He had been told these six words from his precious humans, his father, his mother…

Ever since Izaya was born, he was reviled. Every day, he was subjected to his parents' continual abuse. He didn't even know why, but they hated him.

'I wonder why…' Izaya smiled sadly as a lone tear slid down Izaya's pale cheek.

Wiping the salty water off of his face, Izaya walked toward his wardrobe and sorted through the contents of his fluffy jacket, his mind still pondering on earlier thoughts as he reached for his switchblade buried deep inside his inside pocket.

The shiny blade reflected the morning sunlight filtering through the wall window onto his face as he held it up above his head. Izaya loved this small object, it could bring out a person's darkest part of themselves, it could make them feel so much emotion, something that Izaya loved to see.

"Shizu-chan would love to kill me himself huh…"

Even though a smirk appeared on Izaya's face as he brought the blade up to his neck, more tears started rolling down his cheeks at the thought of the blonde.

'Not going to happen.'


Hha well… that's it. Bye.

This is just a shit storm of bullshit and angst brought to you by this shitty fanfic writer. Hhah…

I'm actually writing stuff for the Shingeki fandom now so… check it out when I update I guess…