an: short i know, and trust me, this piece right here breaks my heart. dedicated to the girls. you know who you are and that i love you.

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"Can't sleep with the man that dims my shine…"

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The rain is pouring so hard that James can't see; it runs in his eyes and messes up his hair, pools in his sneakers and he opens his mouth and screams.

Cars pass around him, horns blazing and lights that flash in the dark. Rain pools on the sidewalk and he watches through dying-star eyes as blues and yellows and reds of the city lay under his feet.

He can hear the faint beat of drums and a heavy guitar solo. He can taste smoke on his tongue. There's still a faint taste of alcohol-- faded yellow beer in red cups, loud music and it burns on his tongue but he still swallows it down-- in his mouth along with the taste of chapstick and cherry peppermint, smoke and the bitter taste of defeat.

He spins around, music playing in his head as he sees staffs and notes, rythms and beats, lyrics half-heartedly written down on the paper. He runs in the rain as lights flicker behind his eyes, flashing and burning.

He can still taste the kiss, of getting wrapped up in something that was never meant to be. The lyrics got into his head and the beer got into his bloodstream and he just messed up and now everything's ruined. He spins as rain pools around him in clouds. Water suffocates him and he swims above the surface to finally be able to scream.

He screams again as the world pulses around him. Isn't this what he's always wanted? The lights and the city, the parties and alcohol and drugs and girls and music? Only, he didn't have his best friends and he was able to leave everything behind.

James realizes that he's mumbling words and he collapses down on the sidewalk. He sobs, water mixing with the tear tracks on his face, his words still in replay replay replay in his head:

"I love you Kendall."

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an: review?