Moment of Change
Disclaimer: There is no way I could ever be creative enough to come up with the Harry Potter universe.
Lily entered the common room after ending her conversation with Severus. Her friends were waiting for her in the corner of the common room in their favorite armchairs. For once, Marlene had not jumped to take Lily's seat once she had moved. This inaction and the pity shining in her friends' eyes made Lily realize she didn't want to listen to anything they had to say.
Nothing they said could make her feel better. Mary would tell her that she should be proud of being a Muggle-born, and the different ways of thinking they brought to the wizarding world. Dory would say she knew what it was like to be different, and how hard it was to hear degrading comments. Marlene would tell her she was better off without Severus, and that he never deserved her friendship. Alice would ask her what she could do to help, and tell her a good cry would make her feel better.
But Lily didn't want to hear any of it. Nothing they said could give her her friend back. Nothing they said could change that there was a war raging outside Hogwarts' walls because of people like her. So Lily turned around and walked out of the portrait hole. She paused to make sure Severus was not in sight before she let the tears she had been holding back all afternoon start falling.
She began running down the long corridors of Hogwarts to an empty classroom she frequented when she wanted privacy. She just wanted to be away from the pain, the pity, and the memories. All she could hear was Severus saying, "Mudblood" over and over like a broken record in her brain.
When Lily reached her destination, she flung the door open and sunk to the floor. She wrapped her arms around her knees, as her body was racked over with sobs. Tears flooded down her face with new force, and she cried out in anguish. Lily didn't know how long she sat in the floor crying before the tears turned into small sniffles. She rubbed her puffy eyes, wondering how long she needed to sit in the empty classroom for the obvious symptoms of crying to go away.
"Lily?"
Lily's head snapped up to see James bloody Potter standing in the doorway of her empty classroom. Lily groaned internally. The last person she wanted to see with red, puffy eyes, wet checks, and frizzy hair was James Potter.
"What do you want?" She tried to snap, but it didn't come out as strong as she had hoped.
"To apologize?" James offered, taking a few steps into the classroom.
Lily scoffed, "You never apologize for anything."
"Er, not usually, no, but I think you deserve one," James said, running a hand through his hair.
Lily rolled her eyes.
"I just- I know you and Snvi-Snape were friends, and I guess you're not now. And I'm just sorry for any part I might have played in that. I mean if I wasn't antagonizing him maybe none of this would have happened," James said.
Lily opened her mouth to say something rude, but "thanks" came out instead.
James just nodded and took a few steps closer. Lily just stared at him blankly for a moment, "Why are you still here?"
"I just don't think you should be alone," James shrugged, sitting down across from her.
"Well, I came here to be alone," Lily huffed.
"Why? I'm sure your friends could have made you feel better," James said.
"What if I don't want to feel better?" Lily snapped.
"Don't be stupid, Evans. Nobody likes feeling like shite," James said.
"Well, I do!" Lily exclaimed, sniffling again.
James smirked slightly, "No, you don't, and you shouldn't have to. So since you don't want to be with your friends, I'm going to stay here until I see some improvement in your mood."
Lily just glared at him, and James smiled in response. After a few minutes of silence, Lily broke it. "How did you find me anyway?" she asked.
James smirked and pointed at his chest, "Marauder."
Lily rolled her eyes, "You're impossible."
"Nah, I just can't tell you Marauder secrets because their not just mine," James said.
"Any secrets you can tell?" Lily asked.
"Not really," James said, with a shrug.
Lily huffed again, "Why do you care about how I feel so much anyway?"
James hazel eyes met Lily's green ones, and he said very seriously, "I care about you."
Lily's eyes widened in shock. Almost every time she had ever seen James he had a goofy smile on his face, and he was teasing someone. Even when he was asking Lily out he was joking, right? He always did it loudly and obnoxiously to embarrass her. But he didn't look like he was joking now. Instead, he was watching her quietly. His eyes were sincere, and a little hopeful? Lily shook her head. She was being ridiculous. Even if James Potter fancied her like Severus said or cared about her like he claimed, Lily still didn't care about him.
James shook his head, "You don't believe me? And even if you did, you wouldn't care."
Lily shook her head again.
"I can't say I blame you," James sighed, "I've always been a bit of a prat to you."
"You think?" Lily said, with an eyeroll.
James gave her a soft smile. "At least you're starting to sound more like yourself again," James said.
Lily raised an eyebrow questioningly at him.
"You're insulting me," James said.
"I just agreed with you!" Lily cried, her face turning red.
"But with an attitude," James said, seriously.
Lily stared at him in disbelief, until James started laughing. Lily couldn't help it, and she started laughing, too. The whole situation was ridiculous. James Potter of all people was comforting her after she lost her best friend. A friend who he hated. When she stopped laughing, she asked, "Why are you here? And don't say you care about me."
James sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He paused before explaining, "About month ago, Sirius did something really stupid, and I thought that I had lost my best mate. The one person that I know I can always count on, and I trust more than anything. I love Pete and Remus, but Sirius is different. I don't ever have to explain myself to him... For the little while that we weren't speaking, it was like I had lost a piece of me. So I guess I kind of know how you feel."
"But you forgave Sirius?"
"Eventually," James nodded.
"Are you saying that I should forgive Severus?" Lily asked in disbelief.
"Absolutely not. Snape is a slimy git that has his long nose stuck way too far in the Dark Arts," James said.
"Now you're starting to sound more like the James Potter I know," Lily mumbled.
James continued like he had not heard her, "But it is not my decision. It's yours. He was your friend, and you should do what you think is best."
Lily looked at him in surprise.
James shrugged, "I'm not a complete prat."
Lily chuckled, "For once I might just agree with you."
James smiled at her. The pair sat in silence for a moment.
"I'm not going to forgive him," Lily finally said.
"You sure?" James asked.
Lily felt a lump in her throat and her eyes began to water. She pushed the lump down and wiped her eyes. She was grateful that James was staring at the floor instead of her.
"It's not just about what he called me. It's about what it meant. He really believes that Muggle-borns are less than everyone else. I'm just the exception for him. If it was Mary, he never would have hesitated to call her a Mudblood. He's friends with the people that attacked her last month for Merlin's sake! And he's going to be a Death Eater just like them, and I don't want to be friends with someone like that. I would just be condoning bigotry and hate," Lily explained.
James nodded, "I know."
"Is that why you hate him so much?" Lily asked.
"Part of it," James admitted, with a slight nod.
"And?"
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," James said, with a smirk.
Lily rolled her eyes, "Another Marauder secret?"
"No, a James secret," James said.
Lily rolled her eyes and stood up.
"You leaving?" James asked, standing up.
Lily nodded, "I think I can face my friends now."
"I'm glad," James said.
"And James?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
AN: Thanks for reading! I'm going to try to write a sequel for this, but school starts soon so I don't know if that will be possible.
