Subtlety for Dummies
Background/Summery: It's been three weeks since episode 5.17 (Pulp Friction). Lorelai and Luke are happy together, and Lorelai decides she's ready for more. But how will she tell Luke without telling Luke? Oh, that's right, she's Lorelai. She'll think ofsomething nutty.
A/N: I'm not exactly new to the fan fiction world. I used to write fan fiction for other categories. I've been watching Gilmore girls diligently, so I know my stuff. But I bet you can't guess how many tries it took for me to spell the word embarrassment right! And hey, this quick edit thing wasn't here last time I wrote a chapter (so long ago). I love it!
Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore girls or other related characters. So stop leaving those threatening messages on my answering machine!
Chapter One
"Ok, are you ready for this?"
"Ready for what, Mom? It's 8 o'clock on a Sunday!"
"So?"
"So you never wake up any earlier than 10:30 on Sundays, let alone have enough energy for a phone conversation! You're always grumpy!"
"Me? I'm never grumpy!"
"Oh, sure, Mom."
"How can you be so ungrateful to someone who birthed you, put you through school, saved you from humiliation, and ended world hunger?"
"Saved me from humiliation? Mom, you are the very definition of humiliation. Look it up in Webster's! It reads, and I quote, 'Humiliation: Embarrassment. See Lorelai Gilmore"
"Silly daughter, no one uses dictionaries anymore. We use It's high tech and hip. Plus, your name is Lorelai Gilmore too. So therefore you are humiliation, so that means that I saved you from yourself."
Rory rolled her eyes. She wasn't awake enough to have a conversation normally up to her witty standards. After all, it was Sunday morning. She would have asked her mom again why she was up, but she knew that when her mom wanted to get to the point, she would. It was best never to push her when she ranted.
"Oh, that's some great logic there. You should come teach at Yale."
"Ha! Now that would be embarrassment! Having your mommy teaching your class. All the other kids would be jealous." Oh no, here it comes! Rory thought. She always knew when her mom would start making annoying voices, and she sighed in anticipation. "They'd go, 'It's not fair! Rory gets more attention than we do, and she gives Rory perfect grades all the time! The Gilmore's are poopy-heads!'"
"I don't think that anyone at Yale would use language like poopy-heads."
"Well, in my class of Lorelai Logic, I would teach them that it's okay to use those words. Somebody needs to put those snotty smart kids in their place."
"Sometimes I wonder whether I'm related to you at all."
"Well, that's good, because there's something I've been meaning to tell you…"
"Mom…"
"We're actually sisters. You're Emily's daughter too!"
"Mom…"
"No, seriously, that would be really scary! Oh my god, can you imagine my mother pregnant at her age now? It would be a medical miracle!"
"Eww! Gross! You just put a bad mental image in my head!"
"And can you imagine her with crazy hormones? I mean, she's a bitch now…"
"You shouldn't say that about your own mother. Even if she has tried to ruin your life recently."
"Rory?" Her tone was suddenly quiet and uncertain, and Rory wondered what triggered the change. Had she brought up painful memories? Lorelai had yet to show up at Friday Night dinners, even 5 weeks after the breakup.
There was a long pause on the telephone line, and they both knew they were waiting for Lorelai to start up again.
"Um…. I've been thinking…."
"That's unusual."
"Rory," and this time her tone was reprimanding. "I'm serious."
"Sorry."
"Uh…well, I've been thinking…"
"You said that," Rory said gently.
"Yes. Well…I'm soo glad that Luke and I are together…It's such a relief because the break up was so horrible, you know?"
"I know. You were devastated for two weeks."
"And I know we've only been together for 4 months, nearly 5(not counting those two weeks) but it feels like it's been much longer."
"You did wait 8 years."
"Yeah…and so…um…. You know I'm in love with Luke, right?"
"That's been established already."
"Well…. How much do you love him?"
"What?"
"How much do you love him?"
"I love Luke a lot." Rory replied with little hesitation. "He's always been there for us."
"So…you wouldn't mind if Luke became…more permanent?"
"You mean you want Luke to move in with you?"
"No. I mean…I think for the first time in my life I'm ready for…marriage."
Dead silence hung in the air on both sides of the telephone. Rory was in shock.
"You're serious."
"Dead serious. I've never been more serious in my life…except for the time I told my parents I was pregnant. That was pretty serious and life changing too."
"You want to get married?"
"Only if it's to Luke."
Slowly Rory broke out into a smile. Then, she laughed and couldn't stop. As the laughter echoed into the phone, she heard her mom speak.
"Rory? W-why are you laughing? This isn't funny. I wasn't joking. Rory?" She was scared, Rory realized.
"No, mom, I know. I'm sorry. I just—this is great!"
"Really?"
"Yes! This is wonderful! I can't imagine anyone better for you. This is amazing! I'm so happy!" She laughed again and soon Lorelai joined in.
"This is great! This is great!" Finally the two settled down, and Lorelai sounded scared again.
"When did you figure this out?" Rory giggled.
"I've been thinking about it since before the vow renewal. It's just started bugging me so much. Last night I finally did a mental pro and con list and decided for sure.! Luke is the One."
"I always suspected."
"I can't imagine my life without him. At all. You know how I feel apart when he was gone. So I don't want to wait too long."
"This is wonderful, Mom! I want to help you plan it! I'll be the maid of honor, and we can have Sookie as your bridesmaid…and I wonder if Luke will consider Kirk to be his best man? And—"
"Wait!" Lorelai interrupted quickly. "This isn't a sure thing. I don't know if it's what Luke wants. I know I want it," she said quickly as she knew that Rory would ask for confirmation. "But he hasn't said anything or done anything that could resemble a hint. So…last night I couldn't sleep and couldn't stop thinking about this. I came up with a plan."
"Oooh! I love plans!"
"Says Miss. Spontaneous."
"Just tell me, will you?"
"Ok, ok. Well, I don't want to say anything about this to Luke if he's not ready. I don't want to scare him into anything he doesn't want. I know that. So I've decided that I'm not going to discuss it with him."
"Mom-"
"No… I've already made that decision. Every marriage offer I've ever gotten has been pushed in one way or another, and I don't want Luke to have to go through that. But… if he is thinking about tying the knot, then I want him to know that I am too so he isn't unsure like I am. That's why I've decided that I'll give him subtle clues that I'm ready for this."
"Like?"
"Like…I don't know. Mentioning someone I know is getting married. Renting My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Stuff like that. If he wants to get married, then he'll read into the clues and know I want to also. If not, then, well, the clues won't hurt anything. Hopefully."
"Mom, how could he not want to get married?"
"Well, maybe he does a little, but he did have a horrible first marriage and he could be reluctant to do it again. Or worried that the same thing might happen to him."
"You never did tell me what ended up ending his marriage. I went away on spring break and when I came back he was single again."
"Uh…well, I don't know if he wants people to know about it. It's really personal. I'll ask him sometime if it's alright."
"Okay. Oh-someone's on the other line, and Lane said she would call me sometime soon. I've got to go. But good luck with the whole hinting thing!"
"So you're ok with this? You give us your blessing?"
Rory grinned. "I give you my blessing." She hung up, still grinning, and opened the line to Lane.
"Lane, why are you calling? It's 8 in the morning on a Sunday!"
