Hi! Heh, this one's a little different from my usual stuff. I kind of needed to get this out, because I've been crying a lot over Trisha lately. ((I have my reasons)) Anyway, I don't know the actual dates that things occur, so I just picked random ones that seem to fit, more or less. I may be wrong sometimes, but oh well. Look past it and enjoy the story. I already warned you that I didn't really know the dates, after all, heh.
Disclaimer: I don't own FullMetal Alchemist. I normally get creative with disclaimers, I know, but this seems like too serious a fic to bother with one.
Every day we live the lie,
Saying we'll never say goodbye.
Then when it happens, we wonder why,
Why did our loved one have to die?
October 3, 1910 - Dear Mom, I'm not sure if you are able to read this, but I figured that I'd give it a shot anyway, just in case you could understand what I was writing on the page. I have no way to contact you otherwise.
First of all, I wanted to say that I'm terribly sorry for our trying to bring you back against the flow of nature. I knew it was wrong, and I should have spoken up, but I have such a hard time speaking my truth against my brother. I'm sorry. From now on, I'll do my very best to make sure that Brother doesn't get into too much trouble. I promise, Mom, I won't let you down, or him.
Secondly, I'm sad to say it, but we just burned down the family home. I was sad to see it go, and I would have cried had I been able to, but Brother was right...it just wasn't home without you there. Having it stand there as a constant reminded petrified us and prevented us from moving forward. We have to move on. We can't make the same mistake twice. I couldn't find an alternative solution for accomplishing Brother's objective. I'm...I'm sorry, Mom.
We'll find a way to restore our bodies to their original state soon enough, so you can relax. I'll take good care of brother, I swear. And when our lives are finally over, I hope to see you again in whatever kind of afterlife there is in store for us, if there is one. I hope there is. There must be. I'm a soul, bound to armor, so there must be.
And when we hear a child cry,
See the tears fall from their eye,
Again it makes us wonder why,
Why do our loved ones have to die?
December 14, 1910 - I'm sorry I haven't written to you in some time, Mom, but I hope that you understand how busy we've been. Brother actually managed to become a State Alchemist, the youngest on record. He managed to pull it off because he had somehow picked up a trick of being able to transmute objects without a circle. I still don't know how he did that, but I'm glad he did. I'm sorry if you don't approve of Brother joining the military, but it's the only way we can see of restoring our original bodies. I did try to talk him out of it at first, but you know how stubborn Brother is. I couldn't fight it, so I tagged along. I'll still keep my promise of taking care of him.
Sigh. But, Mom...perhaps, if you ever find a way to reply back to me...could you possibly tell me if you know why people can suddenly become so cruel and heartless? I still can't believe what that terrible man, Mr. Tucker, did to his own, daughter, Nina. Science that doesn't make people happy is not science at all. How can someone be so evil? Or is that just the core of human nature, and one has to fight to be good? Am I like that at my core? I really hope not. Somehow, I just don't think that the human spirit is inherently that evil. Perhaps it's their flesh. I suppose that that's one advantage of not having a human body.
And when their time to go is nigh,
And their souls are given the wings
to fly,
Those left behind still wonder why,
Why did our loved one have to die?
August 17, 1914 - Oh, Mother, I can't believe the depravity of mankind! Every day, it shocks me a little more. I had thought that we had almost reached our goal, since I was somehow turned into the very thing we've been seeking all these years, the Philosopher's Stone, but Brother refuses to use it...so...I guess we're a little stuck for awhile.
Anyway, we thought that going home would be the best solution at present, or at least, Brother did. I probably should have suggested otherwise, but I held my tongue. I'm sorry, Mother, I'm not trying to let you down. I'll keep my promise to protect him for you, I really will! How did you manage to always reel him in when he was going too far? I certainly can't seem to figure it out.
When we finally got back home, it wasn't long before we found out the horrible truth that some evil person had killed Lieutenant Colonel...or rather, Brigadier General Hughes...right under the military's nose too. What makes the situation harder to bear than it normally would be is that he was trying to help us out in our quest. He was actually doing some research into the Philosopher's Stone for us, and apparently found out some things that he wasn't supposed to know, so they got rid of him. The people in charge of his death must've been within the military itself.
The Colonel and the others tried to protect us from the truth, so we only just found out about it. I'm not sure just how long ago Brigadier General Hughes passed on, but I wish we had known. I appreciate their concern for us though, I understand the gesture, but I have this really bad feeling inside thinking about all those months that we'd talk and think about him, not even knowing he was no longer going to be waiting for us upon our return. I barely knew him, but all the same, I miss him. He was a good man.
Though you may always wonder why,
Heed that you don't live the lie.
For someday you'll have to say
goodbye,
When your closest loved one has to
die.
October 7, 1914 - Mom...I'm not going to write again. At least, I'm not going to write again until I fulfill my promise to you about protecting my brother. I feel like I've failed you, and writing down my failures would just drive the guilt in even deeper. I can't afford to let the guilt get set in that deep. If it does, I may give up, and never be able to fulfill my promise to you. I hope you understand.
Brother and myself were very near the answer this time, but it got extremely carried away. Being the Philosopher's Stone, I was kidnapped by the one who was controlling the homunculi, who were the ones controlling everyone else in order to make the Philosopher's Stone. Apparently, she had feared making the stone herself, since making it oftentimes killed it's creator. She obviously didn't care who else got killed in the process though, and she intended for me to be the next victim.
I had honestly lost the will to fight. I'm sorry to say so, Mom, but it was true. I had lost all hope, and was just going to allow fate to take me where it willed, until Brother showed up to try and save me. Naturally, they weren't about to let me go, and so Brother got involved in a life and death battle with one of the homunculi, named Envy, who had the ability to shapeshift into the likeness of anyone in the world.
In spite of his ability, my brother was winning the fight, no matter who he shapeshifted into to try and destroy Brother's confidence. Sadly, that homunculus even tried shapeshifting into you once to interfere, but Brother wasn't fooled by it. He still kept winning...until Envy switched to his true form. Brother couldn't take it. The family resemblance was unmistakable, and it was too sudden. Envy was apparently a child of our father's...a long lost brother of ours...one that we never knew about.
The shock on Brother's face gave Envy enough time to transform his arm into a spear and jab it through Brother's heart. I watched as he then plopped him onto the floor like a limp rag, and let him bleed to death.
I could sit still no longer. Fighting against all the forces that were holding me down, I stood up and made my way over to where Brother was. I was angry now, and nothing was going to stand in my way. No one touches my brother...no one!
Apparently, my strong emotions gave me heightened senses and intuition. I was able to feel that Brother was still warm, so I knew that his soul was still in the Gate, and that he hadn't disappeared yet. There was still time. It's amazing that I even felt that, now that I think about it.
I did the only thing I could do. I clapped my hands together, to perform a transmutation the way that my brother did...but this one was different. It would be a human transmutation, and it was going to work. If it didn't, and I was taken away, I didn't care. I wasn't going to just let Brother disappear and leave me behind.
When I woke up, sometime later, I was in this room, with a young woman standing over me, calling my name and trying to make me wake up. I didn't know who she was, though she introduced herself to me as Rose. I couldn't seem to remember how I'd gotten there, but I found this journal lying nearby, and it had my handwriting in it, so I'd assumed that it must've been mine. With Rose helping me piece some things together, I've managed to write this last entry. I'm sorry that I can't seem to remember it all without help, Mother. This is the best I can do.
But I won't stop here. I'm going to bring Brother home. Rose told me that Brother DID come back after I'd transmuted him, but then he went and did the same thing for me, since I'd sacrificed myself. Somehow though, I know he's still alive. I don't know where he is, but I'll bring him back. I assure you I will. I'll find him, and bring him back home.
I'll keep my promise to you, Mother, I swear. I'll bring him home.
Well, I hope that you enjoyed that. Feel free to let me know your thoughts on it, especially if you want to see more things like this in the future. Thanks for reading.
