Death of a Killjoy
All I can see are mirages
All I am is a bullet
And I only smile because they are holding a gun to my head
I know I can run
But if I do,
They will paint the desert red
In a warning shot to the friends I haven't lost yet
If there was an escapeāa real one
I would find it lost in the confused mind of a lonely child
Or hidden amongst the wreckage that I grew up in
But since both those things no longer exist
I fear that they will give me two shots to the back of the head
I can hear them laughing
They can see me sweating
But I will not plead for my life
They cannot force me to be afraid
They changed me once
Before I realized who I was
And what I could stand for
I earned the blood on my hands
From owning up to a disaster that only a few others could face
I painted this blood on my hands
To keep from losing all the colour in the world
I will always fight for freedom
The freedom to love, to hate
To feel something
To stay alive
I am a Killjoy
And no bullet in my head
Or dirt above my head
Can wash away my bright orange T-shirt
Or the memory of my purple hair
No villain can erase my truth
And no force can destroy these emotions
They think my end is near
But they ended me long ago
When they found me clinging to the last hope in the world
And they tortured me out of my colours
Just to dim that hope
As a Draculoid
I painted the desert red in a warning shot to friends
Seeing only mirages
That convinced me that fighting for someone else's ideals
Was the best way to uphold my own life
They turned me into a bullet
Just a being who kills for the sake of killing
And for that, I will never be forgiven
The one-time friends who are about to end me
Realized before I did
That I am still a threat to order
Still an enemy to tranquility
Because no matter what anyone does
I can never be silenced
I am a Killjoy
I never back down
I fight to the end
And even when I know I won't make it out alive
I embrace the bullet with a courageous smile
Knowing that I will always have friends
To paint the desert red in a warning shot to my enemies
