Act I Scene I

Lights up on two men, one middle-aged and the other in his early 20s. They both sit on chairs with a small table between them, opposite each other. The older man, the DOCTOR, takes notes in his book as CALVIN speaks to him.

The DOCTOR stands up and addresses the audience.

DOCTOR: I would like to thank you for joining us tonight. I'm sure many of you are familiar with the timeless comic strip from the 80s and 90s, "Calvin & Hobbes." The final panel of Bill Watterson's legendary comic published on December 31st, 1995, had six year-old Calvin sledding away with his famous stuffed tiger Hobbes, exclaiming, "Let's go exploring!" However…six year old Calvin never stopped exploring. Onto when he reached the age of seven, Hobbes remained by his side. And eight. Nine. Ten. Fifteen. Eighteen. Twenty. And now twenty-five. It seems like a friendship to last the ages. However, this wasn't normal. Not to most people. Calvin's lasting relationship with his stuffed tiger was juvenile, and worrisome to much of his family and now-girlfriend, Susie Derkins. He was finally referred to a psychiatrist. And that's where we begin.

(The DOCTOR sits and addresses CALVIN)

DOCTOR: Thank you for coming to see me.

CALVIN: Thank you for seeing me.

DOCTOR: Do you know why you're here today, Calvin?

CALVIN: (a pause) No, I can't say that I do.

DOCTOR: Well, your family is very worried about you, Calvin. So is your girlfriend. Is everything okay with you?

CALVIN: Of course! Things are fine! Why would there be anything wrong?

DOCTOR: As your therapist, it's my job just to be sure that you're all right. Now, how about you tell me about your girlfriend?

CALVIN: My girlfriend? (he takes a second to think) Susie. I met her in first grade when she first moved next door to me. I think we had a crush on each other even then. But I would always pick on her because she's a girl and she was such a know-it-all. She still is, but it's really endearing, you know? I finally got up the nerve to ask her out in freshman year of high school. She said yes as if she'd been waiting for me to ask her forever. We've been together ever since. I'm planning on proposing to her soon, too. She makes me so happy, I can't believe Hobbes and I used to pick on her so much.

DOCTOR: Hobbes?

CALVIN: He's my best friend.

DOCTOR: Tell me a bit about him.

CALVIN: (getting a bit more excited) Oh, Hobbes is great! I've known him since I was three years old. We've gone adventuring and exploring together. He lives with me too. He likes to sleep in my bed, but Susie doesn't really like it. She'll sometimes say to me, "C'mon Calvin, why is Hobbes in the bed with us all the time? Can't it just be the two of us?" But Hobbes has always slept in the bed with me.

DOCTOR: Wait, is Hobbes real, or a stuffed animal?

CALVIN: Oh no, he's real. Anyway, Hobbes really likes tuna. Whenever Susie buys any, it just disappears within a day! Isn't that funny? And whenever I come home, he gives me these huge hugs that sometimes knock me down.

DOCTOR: I see. And what does he look like?

CALVIN: Well, he's got orange hair and black stripes—

DOCTOR: Black stripes?

CALVIN: Yep!

DOCTOR: Now, are we talking about a person or a tiger?

CALVIN: Oh, Hobbes is a tiger. I guess I forgot to mention that.

DOCTOR: I see…and where is Hobbes now?

CALVIN: You ask a lot of questions, don't you, Doc?

HOBBES: (entering) Can you believe it? This guy doesn't even have any tuna!

CALVIN: Hobbes, you can't just go through other people's stuff! C'mon, sit down! (HOBBES sits on the floor next to CALVIN)

DOCTOR: Calvin, is he here now?

CALVIN: Yeah, he's sitting right next to me, can't you see him?

HOBBES: Hey, how you doing, doc?

DOCTOR: Calvin, I don't see anything but a stuffed tiger.

HOBBES: Whoa, he just flat out ignored me.

CALVIN: What are you talking about? He's right here, plain as day. He just said hello to you, too.

DOCTOR: This may be hard to hear, but you're what we call a "schizophrenic."

CALVIN: (hesitating) I…don't get it.

DOCTOR: Hobbes isn't real. He's a figment of your imagination. The fact that you see him and you talk to him, and that he talks to you isn't normal.

HOBBES: First he ignores me, and now he says I'm not real? What a quack! (gets up) Let's leave, Calvin!

CALVIN: (stays sitting) Hobbes…isn't real?

HOBBES: Calvin…don't believe him.

DOCTOR: No, Calvin. You have to believe me and understand me. As a child, you got attached to Hobbes. He was an imaginary friend. It's normal for children to have imaginary friends. But it's not for a 25 year-old man. Perhaps something happened in your childhood that made Hobbes stay around. We're going to try to figure out what it is.

CALVIN: I don't know what it could be.

DOCTOR: We're going to work together. In the meantime, I'm going to prescribe you with some medication, and I want you to come see me about twice a week, okay?

CALVIN: (nods) I understand. (gets up to leave, but pauses) Will the medicine work right away? Like, will Hobbes just…disappear?

DOCTOR: (shakes head) No, it might take a few weeks or even some dosage changes before it works in full.

CALVIN: Okay, good. (looks to Hobbes) I want a chance to say good-bye.

END OF ACT I SCENE I