I'm blatantly playing with time in this story. Deal with it. (Set around S4)

Their suspect was an hour and a half away, so Castle checked the back seat of Beckett's Crown Vic to make sure there were plenty of snacks, water bottles, and CapriSun (because sometimes you wanted something other than water) to keep them refreshed on the drives there and back.

"Castle, we can stop for lunch," said Beckett, an amused smile playing on her lips. "You don't have to bring all this with us."

He looked over the roof of the car at her and matched her stare. "You're going to tell me that you're wanting to take a road trip without oreos and peanut butter?"

Beckett narrowed her eyes at him, sizing him up. Finally, "Crunchy or smooth?"

"Both," he said with a tilt to his head. Without waiting for her response, Castle slid into the passenger seat and closed the door. He didn't even try to hide his grin when Beckett glided behind the wheel and started the car up. "Fine," she said shortly, "but you better get the ratio right."

He chuckled as they pulled into traffic.

They drove to their suspect's house, interviewed him, searched his place, and collected enough evidence to eliminate him. On the drive back, they went through a row of oreos, half a jar of peanut butter (smooth for him, crunchy for her), several packets of fruit snacks, and some CapriSun. Somehow the Doritos had yet to be opened.

They had spent the majority of the drive talking and laughing, telling stories and reminiscing, but eventually their amicable conversation had run dry. They were driving down the interstate in companionable silence until Beckett started getting tired.

"Castle, can I turn the radio on?" she asked, knowing he much preferred to talk rather than listen to music.

Apparently, he didn't care today. She noticed he had gotten a little more pensive with each oreo he made her, but she just wrote it off as road trip fatigue. Either way, she handed him her phone and asked him to plug it in.

Since he was less of a fan than she was of the radio, she let him scroll through her music to find a song to start out. His choice was one she never would have expected from him. It was Water Under the Bridge by Adele.

Raising an eyebrow, she slowly turned her head to look at Castle, silently asking him why this song?

He simply shrugged a shoulder and said, "It's one of Alexis's favorites and I think the story behind it is really relatable."

That comment caught Beckett of guard. She knew things between them had been tense, what with her recent breakup with Josh and her unreadiness to tackle anything real with Castle yet. As the song played, she listened to the lyrics and realized that he was totally right. They were dancing around this relationship, taking turns leading one another into falsely hoping for something more when neither of them were ready.

It's so cold out here in your wilderness

God, does she make him feel like that? She glances over at him and finds him staring, poker-faced, out the windshield. She feels the beseeching bleed from her eyes, but he doesn't look over to notice. Is he trying to slip away from her and this is how he decides to tell her? Well that's bullshit.

If you're gonna let me down, let me down gently / Don't pretend that you don't want me / Our love ain't water under the bridge

None of this is what she wants. She wants him, she just needs some time to heal and cope with what has happened. The past fifteen years. Her heart is breaking thinking about how he must feel, how she must have hurt him. Solemnly, she listens to the rest of the song, about how living life on the run and she realizes once again that she's so screwed up, but she knows he loves her. She loves him, she just doesn't think she can deal with it yet. In that same instant, she realizes that she has to.

Finally, the song ends and she takes a deep breath in. "Yeah, I like that song, too. Kind of beautifully heartbreaking, you know?"

Castle hums beside her but says no more. The next song plays for a few seconds before Beckett speaks up. "Hey, look for a song called Cake by Idina Menzel."

He does as she asks and hits play. The smooth, sassy reggae sounding guitars float through her car. She grins, adjusts her sunglasses and cracks the windows some to let in fresh air. Her hair whips around her face and she sinks into her seat.

One man's drama is another man's dream / One man's torture is another man's treat / One man's trophy is another's mistake / One man's poison is another man's. . .cake

I'm another man's cake

Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Castle sit up straighter, confusion clouding his features. She lets the song play on, talking of beautiful disasters, being all he ever asked for. Castle eventually watches her drive, hair wild, smile relaxed, one hand out the window. When the song is over, she looks at him.

"You know Josh and I split."

He nods, still confused. "Yeah, like, a month ago, right?"

"Something like that. So, Castle," he seems to be holding his breath, "how do you like cake?"