Oh, The Horror!

"Castle!" Esposito's disembodied voice had Rick Castle spinning around at the crime scene, looking for the source.

"Where are you 'Sito?" he called into the gloomy murkiness at the East side dock. The humidity in the air almost had him believing that the East River had engulfed East 59th Street, even the brilliant lights from the majestic Queensboro Bridge did nothing to break through the gloom.

"Right here," the detective hummed right next to Castle's ear, making him squeal and startle.

"Jeez, Espo: you're going to give me a heart attack."

"I'm just messing with you man. It is nearly Halloween, you know."

"Yeah," he agreed, gloomily: he was unable to host his annual Halloween party this year.

The detective continued, "Even though you're forcing me to find a different place to hang this year. What are you going to be this year? I know that while you're not having the party, you're still going to dress up and go somewhere awesome, leaving us all behind. It's cold man, just cold." He shook his head.

"I just have a commitment I can't get out of and, besides, I'm undecided. I had one idea, but Beckett had another, a couple's costume," he muttered as if his mother were standing over him making him eat his carrots.

"Man, I know which one I would choose."

"Easy for you to say," he scoffed. "Walk a mile, my friend: walk a mile." He stared out at the water and pitied Dr. Parrish who was knee deep in the brackish sludge that passed for one of the three rivers that surround Manhattan. He was glad for the waders, but shivered sympathetically when she stopped all forensic activity as a violent tremor shook her body.

"Are you taking Lanie anywhere?" He grinned evilly. "Maybe you should go in a couple's costume."

"Nah. We're off again. I really wanted to go to your party; I was hoping that Alexis might have invited some of her college friends."

"You know how that sounds to me, right?" Castle scowled. "I mean that's my little girl and you want to hook up with friends of hers that are some other poor bastards' little girls."

"Castle…when you were my age, a younger age than what you are now: didn't you fish in younger ponds?"

"I can't even look at you right now," he grumbled, turning away from his friend and took a long draw from his to go cup of coffee and subsequently made a face: it wasn't up to his usual standard, but he caved and bought coffee from a gas station when Beckett stopped on their way to the scene.

As Castle turned, something shimmery caught the work lights set up near the water behind the O.C.M.E. van on the writer's face.

"Castle, you've got something…" Esposito reached up and after Castle ducked away the first time, held him steady to wipe away the shiny substance from the writer's eyelid. Espo slid on the flashlight app on his phone and examined his fingers to find an iridescent dark blueish-green creamy substance. He dropped his hand. "What the hell is that man," he lifted his fingers to his nose and sniffed, "Is that makeup?"

"Yeah, it's…it's just...something. It's Beckett's," he finished reluctantly.

"You wearing Beckett's eye shadow now?"

He fixed the detective with a stony glare, also acquired from Beckett, and simply said, "Halloween is coming."

"Yeah, right," Espo grinned devilishly as he sidled back to the crime scene.


"Stop fidgeting, Richard."

"It itches," whining, he pulled at the costume in the areas which irritated.

His mother batted at his fingers. "You'll smudge something."

He slipped his fingers under his thighs. Under the nylon encasing his thighs.

"Are you ready for the wig?"

He pursed his lips and scowled.

"You could have avoided it if you had only let your hair grow."

"You know that I can't let it grow. The last time I tried that, it took forever and the back grew faster than the top or sides. It looked like I was condemned to mullet hell."

"Yes…that was unfortunate," Martha agreed. "Now stop complaining: this is for a good cause. The whole show is only an hour and a half. Have you been practicing your part?"

"Yes, Mother," he obediently answered, just as he had when he was a kid, but with a touch of the indulgent sarcasm he used as a teen and well into his adult years. "You know that I gave up my party for this," he added petulantly.

She answered him in the same tone, causing him to blush. "Yes, Dear: and we all appreciate your sacrifice." She jammed the hairpins holding the wig in place into his scalp. He was sure he'd be bleeding on the stage. "Hmm," Martha stood back and admired her work in the makeup mirror. "Stand up, Darling. I want to see how tall those shoes make you. Have you been practicing?"

"You better believe it. I don't want to kill myself and they are four inch heels so just under six, six. If I could jump, I'd have a career waiting in the NBA."

Martha indulged in a small half-smile. For all his grumbling and complaining, her son liked to perform especially when he was hidden within a character's makeup and costuming, although, she had to admit, there wasn't that much costume in which to hide.


Esposito stood at the curb and removed his helmet as he hailed a cab. The armor was bulky, but not entirely uncomfortable. Ryan caught up just as a cab pulled up. Espo opened the door and slid into the back seat of the mini-van.

"You both together?" the cabbie asked.

Espo rolled his eyes. "Yeah," he affirmed. "But not like that. His wife is coming in just a second. To Ryan he asked," Where's Jenny?"

Ryan removed the oversized white three-fingered glove and pushed red yarn away from his face. His wife scurried to join them.

"Sorry about that," she said as she climbed in next to her husband. "I need to fix my pinafore."

"Aw, you's is cute," their driver complimented them in broken English. "Most of time, eh? Adult costumes, too sexy—all skin. Nice to see something wholesome for a changes." He shook his head. "Too, now, I don't have to clean off the seats. Where I take you?"

"I think there's a benefit show at the Barrow Street Theatre…just tonight. Rocky Horror, but live," Jenny offered.

Esposito sighed. "It's better than clubbing with Ann and Andy, here." He shook his head and looked out the window. Jenny and Ryan in the forms of Raggedy Ann and Raggedy Andy, respectively was not what Esposito had in mind for their night out. It was bad enough that Castle had cancelled his party, but then his date got food poisoning from eating some concoction that had been at her office party and also had to cancel so he was stuck as the third wheel, an awesome Halo Master Chief third wheel to the flopsy and mopsy twins.

"Hey," Ryan objected, even though Espo knew his partner and knew he hated being dressed as a doll. "Jenny already had these secured before Castle cancelled. He and Beckett were going to do a couple's thing, too."

"Come on, Javi," Jenny soothed. "Let's check out this rendition of Rocky Horror. Maybe you can shout things at the actors."


They arrived just in time for the curtain and got some of the last seats available in the small theatre. Most everyone was dressed traditionally as characters from the show.

Jenny looked over her program. "That's weird."

"What," Ryan asked, flopping his bright red yarn hair out of his face again.

"Well," she began and held her program up. "All the actors have a regular picture and their bio except this Rodger Alexander who plays Frank. He's in full makeup."

"Maybe he's hiding something."

Espo raised an eyebrow. "Maybe he's wanted," he whispered as the house lights dimmed and the show began.


"That was awesome!" Jenny squealed. "I've never seen it in the theatre before…you know live. They did a great job and they raised all that money for The Welcoming Project. What a cool way to spend Halloween."

"Yeah, it was great. That guy who played Dr. Frank N. Furter really knew how to strut, man. I couldn't dance and run in those heels."

"He was huge. I would have killed myself. You know who could run like that? Beckett…" He stopped and squinted at a group of women at the far side of the lobby. "Shit! Isn't that Beckett?"

"Oh hey," Jenny cried, excitedly, "The cast is coming out." She waved toward the theatre doors. The cast, still in costume, exited. Applause erupted as each cast member made an appearance.

Ryan frowned and searched the crowd. "Yeah, hell that is Beckett and Martha." He did a quick search of the crowd. "Holy shit," he muttered, a suspicion growing in his mind.

"Where's Castle?" Esposito asked as he made his way through the crowded lobby toward their friends.

A resounding rumble of applause spread throughout the crowd as Rodger Alexander appeared. He searched the crowd and had a great advantage because of his height in his costume.

"I'll be damned," Ryan chuckled, but frowned as his wife fawned over the lead's physique.

"Beckett," Espo called. Her eyes widened and she looked up to the tall man wearing nothing but a black corset, black panties, a garter belt and stockings, all atop the four inch heels who had just kissed her.

Espo followed her eyes and licked his lips. "Castle? Are you just a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual Transylvania?" Ryan laughed along.

Castle sighed from atop his pumps. He'd be hearing about this for the rest of his life.

His mother gasped, "Oh dear."

Castle smiled and leaned down toward Esposito; his lips puckered, but at the last minute planted a deep red smooch on Jenny's cheek. He straightened and smiled. "Hey Espo, don't you agree? 'A mental mind fuck can be nice.'"