Folding These Emerging Wings

Folding These Emerging Wings

You smile, unaware of the arrow you shot into my heart.

In desperation, I claw at the shaft, trying to draw it out.

Instead, the arrow sinks deeper and hot searing pain

Floods my mind but I endure... I endure... because this

Pain is bearable compared to the pain of letting go

Of the feelings I strive to bury. Your presence creates

Havoc in my soul as I fight to hide these feelings...

these feelings that fill me with both bliss and suffering.

Confusion creeps into my mind when you're around and

drowns my doubts, momentarily filling me with hope but...

It's impossible to wish for something that will never come;

it's like attempting to blow the sun out with one breath.

Yet, even knowing this, I just can't accept defeat!

I grab hold of these feelings and cling on tightly when

I feel that they're slipping thru my grasp. I can't

let go. I won't let go. I'll never let go...

I wish you would just tell me to take the arrow out

of my throbbing heart and I would. I would release

my hold on these feelings I keep under a tight watch.

I would sing with relief, for the tension would be over.

I would cry with pain... for the truth cuts deep.

I would see the world with new eyes and new resolve.

I would watch my fragile heart break to pieces...

I would see the scars form and never heal completely.

I would see you leave and never return to my side.

I would risk never seeing you, never sharing the time I treasure.

Do you see now? Why I never open up to you?

I'd rather suffer from this secret than lose you because of

something I had said. Forget these feelings. Push the thought

out of your mind. Ignore these tears that come, unwilling.

Please... don't go. I'll be fine...

It just hurts to know that you'll never be mine.