Hiding the Hurt

Hello, my lovelies! Just taking a dive into a new fandom with this story. I hope you like it. XO.

Monday Morning.

It was rare for the Kurosaki family to wake up to no breakfast on the table as the youngest of the three children (only younger by 10 minutes, mind you. She will give you a hard time if you say otherwise) was up half an hour before the rest, making rice balls and toast; whatever left unfinished being taken for lunch on that day.

However, on that day, they woke up surprised to not only see an empty table but a lack of said child also. Immediately the house fell into shambles. The doctor screaming about hurting everyone who dared kidnap his precious daughter and her twin sister muttering about how she would be glad to be out of the house. While the commotion reached a new decibel level, the desired individual ran into the kitchen, hair askew and eyes wide.

"I'm sorry! I overslept! Well, actually I woke up on time but I fell asleep in the shower," she squealed. The three turned to look at her in surprise. It was odd to hear about her sleeping in when they all knew she was the first to wake up and the last to go to sleep.

"Forget about that. We thought you died or something. It's fine, we'll grab something from school," Ichigo muttered, while her father tried to get Yuzu to stop bowing and begging for forgiveness.

She made an extra large dinner so to apologize.

Tuesday Evening.

Ichigo did not know what to do when he saw anyone cry. Not that he had to worry about it. Karin showed no emotion. Yuzu was always so happy. Their father got a punch in the face. The only other person he knew to cry was Orihime. But it was often taken care of by Tatsuki.

So when he came home from the library he was alarmed to hear sniffling. Karin and his father had gone to pick up more supplies for the clinic and would not be back until later that night.

He turned to the living room and saw a little ball in a yellow dress sitting in the corner of the room, shivering and sobbing. He immediately ran towards her and turned her around. He had just looked into her eyes when she screamed and shuffled backwards.

"Ichigo! What are you doing here?" She frantically tried to dry her tears while posing her question. She had clearly been crying for a while judging from her red eyes and the tear stains on the front of her top.

"What happened?" He demanded. She looked away (still sniffling).

(He thought back to when he was getting picked on for his orange hair back when he was 6 and he was crying in his room. He remembered how his mother and father came in and comforted him for a whole hour, assuring him that every part of his being was perfect and he needn't worry about what others thought)

"Oh uh. Onions! I was cutting onions. They got into my eyes and they were really messing with me," she giggled but to anyone, it couldn't have sounded more mirthless. She scrambled to her feet and ran to her room, not coming out for dinner.

He didn't think of it again until his father came home and handed him an errand list; stating that they had run out of onions 2 days ago and that they really needed more.

Wednesday Afternoons.

When she wasn't doing chores, she was studying. She was so smart; he teachers telling her that she was as gifted as gifted could be, giving her work that went grades above her class. While Karin followed suit, she still could not seem to achieve scores like her sister and Karin couldn't have been prouder to listen to all her friends talk about how amazing her sister was.

But even then she had trouble because, after all, she was a child and children were not all-knowing; no one was. So she would then go into Ichigo's room with a sheepish expression, pointing out the question she did not know how to solve or approach.

On those days, he would take the book, give the question a one over and explain to her how to solve it. When they were done, she would apologize over and over and compliment him on how smart he was to have solved it.

He couldn't help but notice how, if he never said anything in return, she would walk out of the room with her shoulders hunched. Over time, he came to understand that if he stayed silent, he would think her to be a burden and a waste of time. Of course, he did not see this to be true, he was just unresponsive by nature.

But he realized how much it bothered her. So, lately, he would make more of an effort, to calm her down from her thanking spree and perhaps even throw a compliment back, telling her that she would have eventually have gotten the answer herself, being as smart as she is. On those days, she would walk out of his room, shoulders squared and with a bounce in her steps.

But that afternoon, she looked troubled. He could see it in the way she bit her lips and tangled her hands together. He could see her bouncing her knee and looking worried. Then, even after stating how impressive it was that she had gotten that far through her homework, she would walk out of the room with the hunched shoulders.

(He was reminded of his early days of learning to read Japanese. His mother would sit with him for hours on end because she knew that if she wasn't there according to her own free will, he would feel like he was a waste of time. Maybe that was how Yuzu felt.)

"Yuzu, it's kind of quiet tonight. Do your work in here, it would make it less quiet," he called. She stopped in her step, then turned around with a blinding smile. She scurried back to sit at the table with him.

Every few minutes, he would ask to make sure that she was understanding (the homework and his intentions for letting her stay).

Thursday Night.

The family had become accustomed to hearing the shrill laughter of the younger Kurosaki twin whenever they watched that stupid spirit medium, Don Kanonji; her deep mocking of his infamous laugh; and her yell of triumph whenever he "saves" the ghost.

"Ichigo, look! He did it again! Ooh, I love him so much! He's so cool. But your still cooler, Ichigo. Karin! Laugh with me. Bahahahahahaha!" She screeched happily, jumping around the common room with her arms making Kanonji's signature arm cross.

"Yuzu! Shut up. You're giving the spirits a migraine too," Karin muttered only to be whacked in the back of the head by their eccentric father before being lectured by him on insulting her sister. Yuzu paused her banter and allowed a small frown to grace her lips before letting it slip away into one of her giant smiles.

"Sorry, nee-chan. You're right. Tell the spirits that I'm sorry," she chirped.

Only Ichigo could see the shame and regret behind her smile and how her aura had lost its shine.

Friday Evening.

It came as no surprise to any of the family that Yuzu took it upon herself to take upon the duties of a mother after the death of her own mom. She spent all hours apart from school and homework caring for the family and assuring that the family dynamic was not interrupted by the loss of such an important member.

It also surprised none that if anyone in the house ever was sick, she would drop everything and work tirelessly to care for them until they got better.

The part that confused Ichigo was how Yuzu never seemed to get sick herself in the last 5 years that she had begun to take on the motherly duties. She became a master at making ginger tea and at preparing various soups, yet he had yet to see her asking one of them to prepare it for her.

So when he saw her swaying slightly while mopping the floor, he voiced his concerns.

"Oh nothing at all, Nii-chan. It's just kind of cold today and it's getting to my head is all," she brushed it off like it was nothing. But he noted that it was 68 degrees that day, but how she has relinquished her normal dresses for a thick pair of sweatpants and an old hoodie of his. He noticed her hiding her face on the collar of the sweatshirt before letting out a sound akin to a cough.

He immediately lost his train of thought when he heard a knock on the door followed by a yell from Asano that the movie is going to start soon. He shoved on his shoes and ran out with one last glance at his younger sister.

Saturday Morning.

He had come back home well past midnight, having stopped at a restaurant for dinner after the truthfully crummy movie. He expected to have turned up to everyone in bed, however, to his surprise and worry, this was not the case.

He walked into the kitchen for a glass of water, but he never quite reached the sink. Before he could even enter the room, he saw her lying on the floor, a broom lying next to her as she let out laborious breaths.

"Yuzu!"

She flinched at the sudden noise and sat up, slowly looking around, her eyes landing on her brother.

(The moment triggered a memory of 2 years ago when he was lying on the couch, coughing his lungs out and unable to put down food; only he remembered a quiet presence placing a cool cloth on his head and him waking up to ginger tea on the side table.)

Ichigo went to pick her up, but she scooted away.

"It's okay, Ichigo. I was feeling warm and decided to sleep on the cold floor haha, silly me. I didn't realize how seriously crazy it looks," her voice was so raspy that it made him uneasy. She lifted herself from the floor, rambling as she did, "Did you eat already? I could make you some tea if you want. There should be some leftovers if you're hungry."

Ichigo's jaw clenched, "How long?"

"Oh, I just felt a little sick today. It was probably that red bean ice cream that I ate, it was a little old, we should probably get rid of-"

"I meant how long have you been pretending to never get sick? How long have you been taking care of all of us without looking after yourself?"

Yuzu felt tears in her eyes but she laughed regardless.

(It reminded him of falling on the ground when he was younger and wanting to cry but holding it in so that he wouldn't have to show weakness in front of his mother; only he knew that there would be someone to kiss the wounds and someone around to take care of him if things got worse.)

"Go sit in my room, we don't want Karin getting sick too. I'll get you some tea."

"I-I can't. I tried but I feel queasy when I walk up the stairs. Sorry Nii-chan," she looked away in shame. She didn't look in his direction until she realized that she was being lifted in two arms.

"Ichigo, you don't have to do that. I'll sleep on the couch. There should be blankets in the closets."

Ichigo ignored her and walked up the stairs with the young girl in his arms. He opened the room door with one hand and walked through, careful to not have her head hit the threshold. He placed her on his bed and pulled up the covers. He walked to the closet and pulled out two more blankets and handed them to her.

All without a word.

He left the room and Yuzu let the built up tears fall. She cried and cried until there was nothing left to cry for. She cried for 20 minutes with her throat burning and her body shivering. She seemed to have been doing that more often lately. She laid down with the covers over her head so she could muffle the sound of her sobbing.

She heard the door open but she didn't make an effort to stop crying, not because she didn't want to but because she could not, even when she knew the figure was closer by the sound of something being placed on the night table. She sucked in a sob when she felt and a large hand on her back and the covers being lifted from her head.

"I-I'm sorry, Ichigo."

"Me too. I didn't realize how much weight we had put on your shoulders. You're only 10, Yuzu, you aren't a superhero, nor should you have to be," Ichigo pulled the girl to sit, only to have her spring up and wrap her hands around his neck, sobbing herself exhausted. He wrapped his arms around her too, "You can cry. You can scream. You can let someone make you tea when you're sick. You can speak up when you feel like everything is getting to be too much. You have every right to feel sad. I'm crap at feelings but know that I'm sorry for not taking care of you. So please, forgive me."

He heard the door open and saw Karin and their father standing there too, having heard everything, "She wasn't in bed, so I got dad and... I'm sorry, Yuzu. Forgive us too," Karin whispered. Isshin walked towards the trembling girl and lifted her into his arms murmuring soft apologies to her as well.

For the first time in a long time, Yuzu fell asleep with no worries on her mind.

Sunday Afternoon and Every Day After.

Yuzu woke up in Ichigo's bed. She glanced at the clock and saw that it was well past noon. She started to get up in a panic with bleary eyes but was pushed down gently with two, small hands. Her clearing vision presented Karin holding her from getting up.

"Lay down. We're all fine. Your fever had spiked last night so you're going to have to stay in bed. Dad went to work but Ichigo is downstairs making breakfast," she stated. Yuzu nodded and leaned back, feeling unsure as to what she could do. It'd been a while since she's had a day like this.

"Yuzu," Karin called. Yuzu turned to look at her, "Remember when we were 4 and mom had just died. We promised we would never let each other or Ichigo get hurt. Well, you kept your promise. You kept us both fed and rested and healthy. But... we never did the same."

Yuzu looked away in embarrassment. She remembered that promise well.

She felt Karin take her hand and her looking down at her with a smile on her face, "Now we're going to do the same!"

Ichigo walked into his room with a plate of lemon pancakes with peanut butter, her favourite! He placed the tray on her lap.

"Eat those. I had a hell of a time making them," he scowled.

But his expression softened (not by a lot of course, because that wasn't manly to a 14-year-old boy) when he noticed the smile on her otherwise sickly face.

So that's it! Thanks again!

A few clarifications:

1. This takes place before he meets Rukia, one year prior, in fact. So Ichigo is 14 and the twins are 10.

2. Also, I know there will be people who will think this but please don't make this something that it's not. It's not a "budding relationship" with them or anything. It's a simple story about family and not romance.

3. I really hope that my Nii-chan and Nee-chan thing was done well. I don't do that often but I am reading the manga and they use these honorifics. If I didn't do them right, please let me know. I don't want to offend anyone by misusing the terms.

Until next time!

XOXO

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