It was not something Spock usually felt. Guilt. Of course, Spock rarely felt anyway, being a Vulcan. There is always a time where he felt something unintentionally...for him, emotions were a choice. A Vulcan's amygdala is not 'broken' as such, but it is set so that if a Vulcan begins to have an emotion, he or she will try their hardest to not show it.

But the crew could see right through Spock, they could read him like a book.

Maybe it was obvious, being half Human and all. But this is the story of when a Vulcan felt Human.

A month had passed since the attack of Khan. Starfleet had worked hard on rebuilding the starship Enterprise and bringing her back to how she was, and even more modified than before. Many were still grieving over the death of Admiral Pike and Admiral Marcus, but many were coping with trying to forget the horrors that had occurred on board the Enterprise and the Vengence. Doctor Carol Marcus had happily joined the crew of the Enterprise, and they had welcomed her with all arms as though she was an old family member joining them at a social gathering, although Spock was not entirely pleased of Jim requesting an additional science officer.

Spock.

Being the only Vulcan working at Starfleet at that time, Spock seemed difficult to work with. His intelligence was higher than anyone else on board, although his Vulcan tendencies often caused the other crew to have the urge to rip the hair off his Vulcan scalp. And of course, he had no emotions.

Not until then.

"I'm scared, Spock," the Captain gasped for air, his eyes swollen and weakly glancing at his first officer. "Help me not be. H..how do you choose not to feel?"

Spock felt the cold sensation of a salty droplet run down his pure cheek, it felt as though his eyes were bleeding with pain. "I do not know," he wept. "Right now, I'm failing."

Jim gulped and took another breath, any one of those could have been his last. "I want you to know why I couldn't let you die... why I went back for you.."

"Because you are my friend." The Vulcan placed his trembling hand on the glass window of the radiation chamber, forming the famous Vulcan salute to his dying best friend and Captain. He did the same, moving his hand slowly into the same position as Spock's, using the very last energy he had to do so. Spock had never been in so much pain before; any second now his best friend could die, and he felt that he was to blame.

James Kirk took his last look at Spock as he began to experience his eyes becoming heavier and heavier, any second now his heart was going to give out and he would die a peaceful death. As though Spock knew it was about to happen, the Captain stopped moving and his body came to a halt. His face grew lifeless. He would no longer see the crinkles around his eyes as he laughed, the gazing blue spirals in his eyes. For the Vulcan, every second of his best friend's death felt like an hour, and he would never leave this moment. The only sound Spock could hear was that of the whirring ship of which Jim had just sacrificed himself for. A wave of anger rushed over him, and before he knew it, he was screaming. "KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN." The name bellowed across the Enterprise. It made each and every heart sink, the message had just been passed on that Captain James Tiberius Kirk had died.