I have been working on this for longer than you could imagine! :D You don't need to see the movie The Hangover to understand what's happening; it's all in here. :) For those of you who have seen one of my favorite movies ever, you'll notice that some of these parts are different than how they are in the movie. The reason is that I mostly read from the script of the movie online; I wasn't able to put in writing each scene exactly how it played out because I couldn't remember. For the most part, this stays true to The Hangover and the characters all have the qualities that they do in Glee; it actually sort of amazed me how well each Glee character matched up to the ones in the movie. :)

Some important things you need to know:

Kurt is NOT gay; he is dating Mercedes.

Artie has the use of his legs.

Puck is married to Quinn and they had Beth after they married.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Glee or The Hangover or any of the elements in this story.


Tina answered her ringing phone quickly, pressing it to her ear. "Hello?"

Puck cleared his throat. "Tina? It's Puck."

"Puck, where the hell are you guys?" the pretty Asian-American girl demanded angrily at her fiancé's friend. "I'm freaking out."

"Yeah, listen. Uh . . ." Puck looked around. "We fucked up."

Tina's eyebrows came together. "What are you talking about?"

"The bachelor party, the whole night, it . . . Things got out of control, uh . . ."—Puck closed his eyes briefly—". . . and we lost Artie."

"What?"

"We can't find Artie," Puck repeated.

Tina started getting angry. "What are you saying, Puck? We're getting married in five hours!"

"Yeah," Puck sighed. "That's not gonna happen."


The Day Before


"Make sure to call me right when you get to the hotel," Mercedes ordered Kurt. "Not like that conference in Phoenix. I had to wait two hours for you to call me."

"Yeah, I was the keynote speaker," Kurt reminded his girlfriend. "I was late to the podium."

"Still."

"Yeah, you're totally right. I'm sorry." He tried to kiss Mercedes' forehead, but she grabbed her coffee mug and headed toward the living room. Kurt ran a hand through his perfectly sculpted hair. "What is the matter?"

"I don't know. I just hope you're not gonna go to some strip club while you're up there," Mercedes muttered.

"Mercedes, we're going to Napa Valley," Kurt explained mendaciously. "I don't even think they have strip clubs in wine country."

Mercedes sat on the couch, and Kurt sat next to her. "Well," the coffee-skinned diva breathed, "I'm sure if there is one, Puck will sniff it out."

Kurt sighed. "It's not gonna be like that. Besides, you know how I feel about that."

"I know, I know. It's just boys and their bachelor parties. It's gross."

"You're right. It is gross." Kurt raised an eyebrow.

"Not to mention it's pathetic," Mercedes added.

"Mmhmm," Kurt hummed.

"Those places are filthy."

"Yeah."

Mercedes took on a disgusted expression. "And the worst part is that little girl, grinding and dry humping the fucking stage up there . . . that's somebody's daughter."

"I was just gonna say that!"

"See?" Mercedes exhaled. "I just wish your friends were as mature as you."

Kurt shrugged. "They are mature, actually. You just have to get to know them better." He smirked.

Suddenly, from out on the street, Kurt and Mercedes heard Puck yell through the window, "Paging Dr. Faggot! Dr. Faggot!"

Kurt looked around awkwardly. "I should go," he said.

"That's a good idea, Dr. Faggot," Mercedes said bitterly.

"Have a good weekend. I'm gonna miss you." Kurt bent over to kiss her, but she leaned away, so Kurt planted one right on the shoulder of her striped shirt.


Four guys—Artie, Puck, Kurt, and Finn—were about to have a night they'd never forget.

The bachelor party was for Artie, a lean man with thick glasses and shaggy brown hair, who was going to marry his fiancée Tina the next day. He'd invited his friends, Puck and Kurt, and his soon-to-be brother-in-law, Finn, to come along with him to Las Vegas.

Noah "Puck" Puckerman, a young, hazel-eyed, good-looking school teacher who was bored with his life, had always been Artie's best friend. He lived with his wife, Quinn, and their daughter, Beth. Another good friend of Artie's, Kurt Hummel, was a dentist stuck in a bad relationship with his girlfriend, Mercedes Jones. Finn Hudson, Artie's almost-brother-in-law, was extremely tall, and his hair always seemed to be a little messy. He had brown eyes and a lopsided smile, and he had always been a bit "socially awkward," as his sister Tina liked to say.

Four friends. A night in Las Vegas. No wives or girlfriends.

What could go wrong?


"You know, Artie, I was thinking . . . If you wanna go to Vegas without me, that's totally cool," Finn said.

"What are you talking about?" Artie asked his future brother-in-law. He was focusing solely on adjusting the cuffs on the sleeves of his white shirt, since they had been bothering him, and he just couldn't seem to get them to fit him right.

Finn sighed, running a hand through his already-ruffled hair. "You know, Puck and Kurt, they're your buddies, and it's your bachelor party."

"Come on, Finn. Those two love you." Artie tugged at the end of his right sleeve impatiently.

"And also," Finn sighed, "I don't want you to feel like you have to hold back because your wife's brother's there. I just . . ." He trailed off.

Artie shook his head. "It's not like that. I already told you, Finn, okay? We're just spending the night in Vegas. It's no big deal." He irritably yanked on the sleeve. "Besides, you're not just my wife's brother; you're my brother now."

He looked up to see Finn standing with a white T-shirt on, and no pants.

"I want you to know, Artie, that I'm a steel trap."


"Holy shit."

As the four guys stepped into the villa—which Kurt had paid for, despite his worry of Mercedes finding out what he had used his credit card on—of the hotel they'd be staying at, Caesars, they were dumbfounded. The place was huge. It was colorful, but, at the moment, the guys didn't really care. Their eyes caught the large television, the wide, comfortable-looking sofa, and everything else that made them wish they could actually live there.

"Now, this is Vegas," Puck laughed.

"Oh, my," Kurt mumbled. "This place is enormous!"

Artie stepped forward and took in the looks of the place. "Now we're talking."

"Is this all one suite?" Finn asked, grinning lopsidedly.

"Thank you, guys." Artie turned on his heel to face his friends. "Or, should I say, thank you, Kurt."

"You're welcome. It's only because I love you."

"Okay, ladies, pick a room," Puck ordered, starting to walk toward his chosen room. "Get dressed. Let's be ready in thirty minutes."

Artie looked around once more, smirking. He was so thankful that he had a friend like Kurt to use his own money for Artie's bachelor party. And Puck talked him into going to Vegas in the first place, which Artie was appreciative for now. Artie thought Finn was pretty funny, and he'd be a cool brother-in-law.

"I just wish you could see this place because you, of all people, would love it."

Artie spun around to see Kurt jabbering away on his phone, obviously to Mercedes. Artie couldn't help but feel bad for Kurt. He'd had to lie to Mercedes about where they were going. It seemed as if Kurt was scared of her, like she'd break up with him if he said something wrong. And she probably would.

"Yeah. It's so quaint," Kurt lied.

Artie waited as Mercedes talked on the other line. He couldn't hear what she was saying, only what Kurt was saying back to her.

"Yeah, no, there's no TVs, no phones." Kurt closed his eyes. "They just have these cute little antique radios in all the rooms."

Artie chuckled softly.

"Yeah. What else, um . . . We, uh, met the proprietor."

Oh, this'll be good, Artie thought to himself.

"What's his name?" Kurt questioned, his voice high-pitched as if he were clarifying the question Mercedes asked. "Um . . . Caesar . . . Palacè."

Artie bit his lip to prevent from laughing aloud.

"Yeah, like the salad," Kurt sighed. "Okay, well, listen, I gotta go because we're gonna hit this wine tasting."

Artie shook his head and headed toward his room. He stopped when he heard Puck's voice from behind him.

"I'm not even gonna say anything, it's so embarrassing," Puck grumbled, sauntering over to Kurt.

Kurt rolled his eyes and sighed. "Where's Finn?"

"He, uh, went downstairs. He said he had to grab a few things."

"Good, because I have something to show you." Kurt reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out a little cube. He flipped open the black velvet top of the box to reveal a gold band with a large silver diamond on the top.

"What the hell is that?" Puck asked.

Kurt narrowed his eyes. "What do you think?"

"If it's what I think it is," Puck muttered, "I think it's a big fucking mistake."

Kurt ignored Puck and turned to Artie. "I'm gonna propose to Mercedes at your wedding, after the ceremony."

"Kurt, congratulations!" Artie exclaimed, slapping Kurt's back.

"Thanks, Artie."

Artie took the box out of Kurt's hand and examined it on all sides. "It's a beautiful ring."

"Yeah." Kurt nodded. "It's my grandmother's. She made it all the way through the Holocaust with that thing."

Puck waved both hands in the air, closing his eyes. When his eyes reopened, he stepped toward Kurt. "Wait, have you not listened to anything I have ever said?"

"Puck, we've been dating for three years. It's time," Kurt said, taking the ring into his own hands once again. "This is how it works."

"A, this is bullshit," Puck groused, grabbing the little box and staring at the ring with a grimace fixed on his face. "And B, she is a complete bitch." He shook his head and scoffed, shoving the golden band back into Kurt's waiting hands.

"Hey, that's his fiancée," Artie said, putting his hand on Kurt's shoulder. He pulled it away almost immediately and his eyes moved back to stare at the ring.

Puck folded his arms across his chest, cocked an eyebrow, and shifted his weight over to one side. "What? It's true." Both Kurt and Artie stared at him with raised eyebrows. "It's true." Kurt rolled his eyes and looked away, but Artie's eyebrows lifted even further. "You know it's true. She beats him."

"That was twice," Kurt sighed, "and I was out of line. She's strong-willed, and I respect that."

"Wow," Puck breathed. He rolled his eyes, and then repeated, "Wow." He ambled across the room and plopped down on the sofa. "He's in denial. Not to mention, she fucked a sailor."

"Hey, he wasn't a sailor. He was a bartender on a cruise ship. You know that." Artie went and sat next to Puck, followed by Kurt.

Kurt put his hands in the air. "Guys, I'm standing right here. So I can hear everything that you're saying."

Suddenly, Finn entered the villa. He tossed a bag to the side and approached the other three guys, sighing. "Hey, guys. You ready to let the dogs out?"

"What?" Puck asked, leaning forward.

Kurt looked at Artie and murmured, "Do what?"

"Let the dogs out." Finn shrugged. "You know."

"Who brought this guy?" Puck mumbled, turning away.

Artie stood up and patted his soon-to-be-brother-in-law's shoulder. "Yes, Finn, we are ready to let the dogs out."


"You're not really wearing that, are you?" Puck asked Finn, looking the tall guy up and down.

"Wearing what?" Finn looked down at himself, and then his confused, slightly wide eyes moved back to Puck's face.

"The man-purse. You're actually gonna wear that"—Puck looked around at Finn, Artie, and Kurt—"or are you guys fucking with me?"

"It's where I keep all my things. I get a lot of compliments on this." Finn held the brown bag in one hand and shook it for emphasis. "Plus, it's not a man-purse. It's called a satchel. Indiana Jones wears one."

"So does Joy Behar," Puck remarked, smirking.

Finn rolled his eyes.


"Guys, come on up here," Puck called down to his friends.

"Fine." The three of them joined Puck on the rooftop of the hotel. They stared out at the shining lights of Las Vegas. Cars zoomed by on the streets, and neon lights flashed nonstop throughout the town. Never-closing casinos, night clubs, discotheques, and bars lit up the long roads.

"How the hell did you find this place?" Artie asked Puck in a hushed tone.

Puck waved a hand at Artie. "Don't worry about it."

"Oh!" Finn yelled.

Artie looked at Finn. "You all right?"

Finn nodded. "Yeah."

"Look at the view up here," Kurt breathed, smirking.

"You happy?" Puck asked Artie. Artie glanced at his best friend. He turned away with a smile on his face, nodding. Artie was genuinely blissful, all thanks to his friends.

"This is great." Kurt still hadn't gotten over how beautiful Vegas was.

"Whoa! Are you kidding?" Finn yelled, stepping forward.

"What do you got over there, Finn?" Artie asked, approaching the awkward man.

"That's the Eiffel tower." Finn pointed straight ahead. "Right?"

Kurt scratched his ear. Artie placed his hand on Finn's shoulder and was about to say something, but Puck cut him off. "A little Jägermeister."

The guys all turned to Puck, who handed each of his friends a shot glass. Puck held one in his own hand and put the small bottle down behind him. When he faced his friends again, Artie grinned. "Good idea."

"There it is."

"Good call," Kurt said. He motioned to their surroundings. "On the roof."

"Um, no, this is good. I'd like to make a toast." Puck raised his glass and smirked. "To Artie and Tina. May tonight be but a minor speed bump in an otherwise very long and healthy marriage."

"Cheers," the four friends chorused, all stepping in to tap their glasses together.

"Short and sweet," Kurt commented.

"Oh, it's like college."

Each of the guys took a sip of their drinks and looked out at the streets of Vegas once again. They all knew they were going to have a great time tonight, and not waste one moment.

"All right, I wanna talk about something," Finn uttered suddenly. "I'd like to say something that I prepared tonight."

Artie nodded. "All right, Finn."

Finn pulled a folded paper out of his pocket. He unfolded it and cleared his throat as he began to read off of it: "Hello. How about that ride in? I guess that's why they call it Sin City." He looked down as he continued. "You guys might not know this, but I consider myself a bit of a loner. I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack." He looked up again. "But when my sister brought Artie home, I knew he was one of my own. And my wolf pack, it grew by one. So there were two of us in the wolf pack. And six months ago, when Artie introduced me to you guys, I thought, 'Wait a second. Could it be?' And now I know for sure: I just added two more guys to my wolf pack."

"All right," Kurt breathed, shrugging.

"Four of us wolves," Finn continued, "running around the desert together in Las Vegas, looking for strippers and cocaine. So tonight, I make a toast."

Finn pulled a knife out of his back pocket, beginning to run the sharp tip over the palm of his hand.

"Whoa," Artie shouted, and at the same time, Puck yelled, "Dude, what the fuck?"

"What the hell are you doing?" Kurt yelled.

Finn took a deep breath and held his shaking bloodied hand out. "Blood brothers."

"Don't . . . Why did you . . . ?"

"Damn it," Finn hissed, staring with wide, intent brown eyes as the red liquid trickled down his hand, running down every little line in the skin of his palm. He swallowed hard and blinked once. He used his other hand to hold the knife out toward Kurt. "Here."

"Finn . . ." Artie began, but he trailed off.

"No." Kurt shook his head dynamically. "No, I'm not doing that." He pressed the heel of his right hand to his eye, rubbing it before putting his arm back at his side. He sighed dramatically.

Puck smirked as he nodded once at Kurt. "Go ahead, Hummel."

"Make him stop."

"Finn, we're not gonna cut ourselves. Give me the knife." Hesitantly, Artie stepped forward and waited for Finn to place the knife in his outstretched hand. "Slowly." Finn placed the weapon in the palm of Artie's hand. "Thank you. Okay. Thank you very much."

Finn pressed the injured hand to his mouth to ease the pain. Kurt cringed as Finn's tongue swept along the gash, wiping the blood away.

"You all right?" Puck asked Finn. "Are you okay?"

"Mmhmm," Finn hummed.

"Do you need a doctor?" Kurt questioned.

"He's good," Artie assured them.

"You sure?"

"I'm good," Finn agreed with Artie.

"Perfect." Artie stepped toward his friends. "Finn, come here, buddy."

"Get in here, crazy," Puck said, pushing Finn forward. He smirked at Artie, Kurt, and Finn, his eyebrows raised. He held his drink in the air. "All right. To a night the four of us will never forget."

They tapped their glasses together once again, and Artie said, "There it is."

"Hear, hear." Kurt chuckled.

After a few moments of silence, staring at the flashing lights again, Artie spoke up. "Hey, thanks, guys."

Though they were looking forward to the craziest night ever, what they actually did that night was unforeseen by them all.