Louise Rennison owns the plot, sort of, while J.K. Rowling, the characters. I'm a bit peeved right now because I'm in a hurry to post.

                                                Harry, Thongs and Full-frontal Snogging

Monday

9:25 am

It's a bloody Monday. I hate Mondays. Mondays mean I can't have my tweezers because Snape-the bloody bastard-does his general check-up of the Slytherin dorms. Last time he did, he found Blaise's thong undies and my Mickey Mouse knickers which was bad, because the rest of my housemates kept on teasing me for a week. I hexed them all-the good for nothing shmucks. The teasings died down, because every body but Blaise and me had boils everywhere even in the private area. Hehe, let them suffer. Got detention from the 'old hag' McGonagall. Honestly, you can see her veins through her scaly skin and her eyeballs almost loll out of their sockets it's only a miracle they stay put-it creeps the shit out of me.

Anyway, to make things short, no tweezers mean that I can't pluck my brows. My brows will eventually thicken and I'll be ugly for a week, which will mar future hopes of seducing sexy Harry Potter. Hm, I wonder if he likes guys with thick eyelashes. Are thick brows genetic? Father says they are. But he doesn't have tweezers in his drawers and his brows are really thin. Maybe I can fix this up with a shave. For now, I must throw away my tweezers.

3:00

Who's the man? I am! Ha! That mudblood thinks she can have Harry for herself! I think not!  I'd insulted them on my way to Potions class and saw her almost barraging her big busts to Potter's face and Harry had this cute, disgusted expression on his face. I winked at him to get his anger in a start and I SWEAR to GOD he winked back. Harry is such a sex god! Damn. I haven't shaved my brows yet.

3:25

AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! My eyebrows are so thin you could practically say they don't exist at all! I started off with a small shave and then-POOF! They were gone. NO!!! *sob, sob*

4:00

Maybe I should cut some of my hair and paste it on my forehead where my eyebrows should be. Uh-oh. Somebody's coming into the bathroom.

Harry?!

"Malfoy?" uh-oh.

"uh.. Hehehehe?" I turned to the mirror in front of me; I hadn't any eyebrows anymore. Potter began to laugh as my cheeks flustered.

He started laughing so hard, he wheezed on the floor. "Potter-"

It was difficult to be without any eyebrows to highlight my pissed off features.

"Shut up."

Harry walked over to me and laughed and pointed at my eyebrows or lack thereof.

Then he traced a thin line over it and stopped.

"Do you know how to kiss?"

"Excuse me?"

"I take that as a no."

"Potter of course I know how to--"