A/N: This one is pretty good if I do say so myself.. :D
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or The Hardest Thing....that makes me sad....really sad.....really reallly REALLY sad!!!!
We both know that I shouldn't be here,
This is wrong,
And baby it's killing me,
It's killing you,
Both of us trying to be strong
There in his arms is where she wanted to be forever.
He looked down to the beauty he held. He was sure both o them knew they couldn't keep up their secret rendezvous. He can't leave Rin unattended all the time. And as for he, he knew it had to do with InuYasha. He closed his eyes for a moment to rid him of his thoughts. He wouldn't let his anger and envy of InuYasha ruin the last moments he has with Kagome. He held her closer.
I got somewhere else to be,
Promises to keep,
Someone else who loves me,
and trusts me fast asleep
'That promise. My promise. I promised. No matter how much I wish this moment in time to freeze forever. I promised InuYasha I would stay with him. Kagome remembered all too well when InuYasha confessed his love for her. And unfortunately, so did Sesshomaru.
FLASHBACK
"Kagome! Wait! I need to talk to you."
Kagome stopped her leisurely walk and turned around to face him. What he didn't know was that she was taking a leisurely walk to Sesshomaru.
And unbeknown to the both of them, they had an audience. A pair of narrow golden eyes watching the both of them.
"What is it InuYasha?"
InuYasha's face was tinged with pink and his bangs covered his own pair of amber pools.
"It's just that, I...you...err...I love you Kagome! Kagome, I know I made mistakes in the past but that doesn't mean I didn't love you. I was the one that resurrected Kikyo be saying her name so it was my job to make sure she rests in peace."
END FLASHBACK
I've made up my mind,
There is no turning back
She's been good to me
and she deserves better than that!
Sesshomaru was sure that she wanted to be with the hanyou now that her love is reciprocated.
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have
to do,
To look you in the eye and
tell you I don't love you!
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have
to lie,
To show no emotion when you
start to cry!
Sesshomaru held his breath.
He smelt salt. Tears to be exact. He was afraid for the first time, to look at her face. He could tell she was crying, more like sobbing, a lot. The tears almost over powered her natural sakura blossom and rain water scent.
He held her even tighter, keeping in mind not to suffocate her, closed his eyes and rested his chin on the crown of her head.
Kagome felt trapped. Her heart is being forced to love someone and she can't do a damn thing about it. (I beg to differ, I can type something else...but that would contradict the point of writing this...ON WITH THE STORY!)
I can't let you see what you mean
to me
When my hands are tied
and my heart's not free
We're not meant to be....
There was also the matter of following his father's footsteps. Did he really want to condemn Kagome to a life of solitude and hatred like Izayoi? She was forced to live in another castle, both guarded and disliked by the staff. Even if he had her, he wouldn't, couldn't, allow her to live such a life.
It's the hardest thing I'll ever
have to do,
To turn around and walk away
pretending I don't love you.
I know we'll meet again,
Fate has a place and time,
So you can get on with your life,
I've got to be cruel to be kind.
Sesshomaru has a feeling that someday they'll cross paths again. 'But it must be after I walk away from her and she moves on with the half-breed.'
Kagome had to swallow back a bitter laugh after thinking about a book she read. Dr. Zhivago. A man caught in between two loves. The thought of it brought even more tears to her eyes.
Sesshomaru fought in countless wars, some by himself, killed countless demons without even batting an eye. However, telling this girl he doesn't love her and walk away is probably the hardest and most painful thing he'll ever do.
He pulled Kagome away to be able to look her in the eyes. He nearly broke down himself looking at her tear stained face.
Maybe another time, another day,
Much as I want to,
I can't stay!
I've made up my mind,
There is no turning back
She's been good to me,
And she deserves better than that!
"Maybe another time, another day."
Kagome was confused by his words at first. Realization slowly dawned in.
She looked up into his eyes and saw an emotion. But before she could decipher it, it disappeared just as quickly as it came. She tried gazing deeper in his eyes, hoping to see that emotion again. Unconsciously, getting lost in the molten pools. Without thinking she said the words that would tear up her heart.
"I'm...I'm extremely, truly, very sorry. I care about you with all my heart but," she steeled herself for a moment, making sure she doesn't start sobbing again. "I don't love you."
That same emotion leaked back into his eyes but, it had a friend before it disappeared again. That was starting to get on her nerves.
It's the hardest I'll ever have to do,
To look you in the eye,
and tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie,
To show no emotion when you start to cry.
"I..." He had to choose his words carefully. "care deeply for you as well. But I am incapable of loving. I understand your love for the half- InuYasha. And I will not stop you from doing what you want."
He was sure that Kagome saw the pain and love in his eyes. He was hoping that she wasn't able to tell what it was.
I can't let you see what you mean to me,
When my hands are tied an my hearts not free.
We're not meant to be...
Both heard InuYasha shouting in the distance. Kagome gently pulled away from Sesshomaru and gave him a smile of pure gratitude. And silently said, "Thank you."
Sesshomaru gave a slight nod and jumped behind the tree line just out of sight.
InuYasha reached Kagome asking her if she was ready to head back. She silently nodded to him keeping her tears at bay. She gave him a gentle hug and grabbed his hand letting him lead her back to the village.
As she slowly left his view sudden realization hit her smack in the face.
The two emotions she saw in his eyes...she knows what they are. She experienced both of them. One more than she would have liked.
The two emotions were: pain......and love.
Her eyes widened tremendously and she whipped her head so fast one could only wonder how she didn't get whiplash. She immediately stopped and looked beyond the treeline looking for him. She caught a small glance of his eyes and saw the two emotions again. InuYasha must have noticed she stopped and gently tugged her hand asking what was wrong. She shook her head as if to say nothing and continued walking back to the village. Ahead of InuYasha so he won't be able to look at her eyes that were shinning with tears and glossed over with too many emotions to pick out. She knew if he didn't want her to see him at the moment then she should let that be.
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do,
To turn around and walk away pretending I don't love you...
A/N: This was hard to type without crying for me....I was always one for a sad love story....I would've been done with this a looonnnnggg time ago if I didn't keep stopping.
And for those of you waiting for the other story Side Trip...I have caught the amazing ability of catching a virus and deleted the work I had on that story. I'm working on getting rid of it so I can get that story updated ASAP without having my data deleted.
Review and give me your opinion if I should make this story more than a one-shot.
Hugs and Kisses...Your Yami-no-Tenshi Yuffie
