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Insanity of Game Shows
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Disclaimer: I do not own RFR or Who Wants to be a Millionare?
Hi everyone! This fanfic is about Radio Free Roscoe in GAME SHOW FORM! Or, if I run out of ideas, reality show form. Yay! Isn't this going to be fun? Yes it is! Today's game show is...
WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE?
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Allie: (walks onto the TV set, where people are clapping, whistling, mooning people, etc., and with flashy lights going up and down and all around) Hello and welcome. I'm Allie, host of Who Wants to be a Millionare? (clapping dies down) Don't you just love this TV show? I mean, almost no one wins and it's filled with facts that won't help you at all!
(laughter)
Allie: Yes, I know I am funnier than that old host, Regis!
Random Person Who Strangley Looks Like Dangrassi: What happened to him anyway?
(camera cuts to a picture of Regis tied up in a closet, with his mouth taped shut, but he's desperatly trying to yell, HELP)
Allie: (stammers) Uh, uh, who like ice cream?
Random Person Who Strangely Looks Like Dangrassi: I do! I do! What was I just thinking about?
(camera cuts to a picture of Regis, trying to scream, with the words subtitled at the bottom: I do! I do!)
Allie: Well, too bad. I'm never gonna give it to you!
(laughter)
Allie: Okay! Let's bring out our first contestant. He's from Roscoe High, he's got bushy hair, and he swoons at the word loves LOVES a girl that just moved to Paris...
Robbie: (yells) HEY!
Allie: ...it's ROBBIE MCGRATH!
(no clapping, crickets)
Robbie: (runs out) Woo! I'm Robbie McGrath! The character that no one cares about!
(still no clapping, a cough)
Allie: Okay, Robbie, don't talk, you're bringing down ratings.
Random Person Who Strangely Looks Like Dangrassi: BOOO! WE WANT LILY! WE WANT TRAVIS!
Allie: What about Ray?
Random Person Who Strangely Looks Like Dangrassi: (shrugs) Who needs him? You have Travis, you have Lily, you have the perfect show. Ray's just the comic relief. Since he got the girlfriend Grace, his popularity has went down.
Ray: (sighs, looks sad) It's true...but at least I have good hair.
Allie, President of Ray Fan Club: SQUEALS OHMIGOD YOU SO DO RAY OHMIGOD OHMIGOD!
Robbie: (sticks out his tounge) I have better.
Brenna, President of Robbie Fan Club: SQUEALS OHMIGOD YOU SO DO ROBBIE OHMIGOD OHMIGOD!
Ray: (rolls his eyes) Yeah right, Afro Boy.
Travis: (appears out of no where) Guys, guys, no fighting. I mean, the great Buddha always says...(looks dangerously sexy) I've got the best hair.
Fangirls of Travis: SQUEAL OHMIGOD YOU SO DO TRAVIS OHMIGOD OHMIGOD!
Allie: Uhhh, let's go back to the show. Okay, anyway, Robbie, tell us about yourself.
Robbie: Well, I...
Allie: (intrrupts) Okay, that's good. First question!
Robbie: (looks hurt) But, I, I...
Allie: Shut up Robbie. The only reason you're on here is because you paid me. And Ray was getting his hair down and Travis was meditating, and when Travis meditates, you cannot stop the sexiness.
(camera cuts to a picture of Travis winking)
Allie: Anyway, first question. What does RFR stand for?
A. Real Fun Run
B. Real Fried Rice
C. Radio Free Roscoe or .
D. Random Family Requirements
Robbie: (thinks) I'll go with C, Radio Free Roscoe.
Allie: (gets real close to his face) FINAL ANSWER?
Robbie: (glances around, blinks, beads of sweat go down his face) Uh, uh, uh...f-final answer!
Allie: Robbie, that is so dumb of you...
Robbie: Great, another failure in the family.
Allie: TO GET IT RIGHT!
Robbie: (cheers) YES!
Allie: You got $0,000,0000.01, now one gazillion questions to go!
Robbie: YAY!
(one hour later, people are sleeping, Robbie is yawning)
Allie: Okay, this is the LAST question Robbie. You get this, you get a miillion dollars.
Robbie: (perks up) I'm ready Allie.
Allie: Did I ask if you were ready?
Robbie: Noo...
Allie: Did I say I wasready to give you the question right NOW?
Robbie: Uh...
Allie: (getting hysterical) GOD! You always think you KNOW me, but you DON'T!
Robbie: (kinda freaked out) Can we get on with it?
Allie: (realizes she just snapped) Okay, um, sorry about that. Alright! THE FINAL QUESTION. WHO is Question Mark?
A. Kim
B. Robbie
C. Ed or Ted...or
D. Barney
Robbie: (his face froze) Oh crap. (looks at the money: $999,999.99) It's...uh...
Robbie's Angel on his Right Shoulder: (appears) Don't do it Robbie.
Robbie: (looks at the angel) Wha?
Robbie's Devil on his Left Shoulder: (appears) Do it Robbie! If you do, you can get a lot of money for RFR! You'll be helping them!
Angel: (argues) BUT, if you do that, no one will listen to you because you are such a big loser at Roscoe.
Robbie: (looks at him) Oh, thanks a lot. I thought you were my angel!
Angel: I have to tell the truth...(plucks at his harp)
Devil: Hey, if you have all that money, you can get yourself not to be a big loser.
Angel: But what about the moral of RFR?
Devil: Who cares about moral? He can become the star of the show, instead of being the kid behind the Love Triangle that's now a Love Stop Sign but whatever...
Angel: (protesting) But RFR is not about that!
Devil: (pokes Robbie) Star of the show, buddy! You can buy your way to popularity!
Robbie: (glances at him) Stop touching me...
(Slow music comes in the background)
Devil: Great, the slow music!
Angel: Remember why you made RFR? You made it to voice your opinion! Without being judged! Remember Robbie?
Robbie: (with tears in his eyes) YES! I remember! I remember!
Devil: But you're a loser! Remember?
Robbie: (thwacks the devil away) MY FINAL ANSWER IS D. BARNEY!
Angel: Wonderful! (disappears)
Allie: Robbie, that's incorrect.
Camera cuts to Barney, surrounded by little kids
Little Kid #1: Didn't you say you WERE Question Mark?
Little Kid #2: Yeah, you lied to us!
Little Kid #3: You bastard!
(all the little kids jump on him, punching him in the face)
Barney: NO! NO! NO! I am, I AM Question Mark! It's just a big misunderstanding!
(camera cuts back to the show)
Allie: The correct answer was --
(camera fizzles, and says, PLEASE STAND BY)
Viewer at home wearing a I REALLY REALLY WANTED TO KNOW WHO QUESTION MARK WAS t shirt: Hey! I wanted to know who it was! No fair! (kicks TV)
(camera goes back to the set)
Lily: Why do they call it Please Stand By? I mean, is the TV lonely and does it want us to stand by it? Can we SIT by it?
Travis: Good question Lily. Maybe you should make a song about it!
Parker: (appears next to Travis) But Travis, I want to make a song about it...
Travis: (holds Parker) Then you should. You make much better songs than her.
Lily: WHY? WHY DOES PARKER GET TRAVIS? HE WAS MIIIIIINE!
Travis: Sorry babe.
Lily: Did you just call me 'babe'?
Allie: Well, uh, anyway, you lose all your money. And no one still cares about you.
Robbie: (sighs) I had to do what I had to do.
Allie: And you know what the funny thing is? You could have just said, "I want to keep the money I have already." But you didn't! Hahahaha!
Robbie: (freezes) What?
Allie: (laughing hysterically)
Robbie: WHAT! WHAT! NOOOOOO! A MILLION MOOLAH GONE! GONE! (runs off crying)
Allie: (wipes away tears she got from laughing so hard) Okay, let's go to our next contestant...LIL-AY!
Travis: Who's Lil-ay?
Lil-ay: ME!
Allie: (reads card again) Oops, sorry. I meant Lily, not that skankLil-ay.
Lil-ay: Hmph..
Lily: Yay! I'm on TV!
Allie: You're always on TV.
Lily: (puzzled) I am?
Allie: Yeah, you play the life of Kate Todd...remember?
Lily: (blank look on her face) No.
Allie: Oh well. First question Lily! Are you ready?
Lily: No.
Allie: Too bad! First question is...Which cousin/relative/childhood friend/long lost sibling of the RFR crew is sexy, smart, hot, beautiful, and everything you're not?
Lily: (angry) Hey!
Ed and Ted: It's us! We're sexy!
Allie: Uh, right.
A. Mary Sue
B. Parker
C. Me
D. Sabrina the Teenage Witch
Lily: (thinks) A. Mary Sue! Final answer.
Allie: That's correct!
Lily: Woo hoo!
Mary Sue: (appears in crowd) I would have gotten that correct. I mean, I am smarter than her.
All the boys: (nod) Yes, we love you Mary Sue.
Mary Sue: (giggles) I know you do!
Lily: (getting angry) Grrrr...
Allie: Uh...
Mary Sue: (flips her hair) Everyone loooves me. I am so much more prettier than that loser Lily. (laughs)
Lily: (now furious)
Allie: Hey Lily!
Lily: What? (turns down to her)
Allie: Simmer down tiger, you want a million bucks or what?
Lily: (sighs) Okay, then...
(an hour later)
Allie: OKAY! Final question to get a million bucks! WHO do you love the most?
A. River
B. Ray
C. Travis or
D. Robbie
Lily: (gasps) I do not know!
River: Hey Lily! Remember...I'm popular!(gives him an ugly smile)
Travis: Hi Lily, remember...I'm shexay!
Robbie: Hey, Lily, remember that I don't honestly care!
Ray: Remember that...I love you Lily! (jumps onto the stage and gives her a kiss)
Lily: (happy) Really?
Ray: No, this is just a dream inside your head of what I would do if you picked me.
Lily: (sad) Oh.
Ray: And anyway, I already have Grace!
Travis: And I have Parker.
Robbie: And I have Kim!
River: And I have...everyone!
Lily: (mouth wide open) So it doesn't matter WHO I pick?
Travis: (unusally happy) Yup! You took forever to pick one of us, so we just got girlfriends. We didn't want to wait for you forever Lily. You're not that pretty, anyway.
Lily: (gasps)
Mary Sue: That's what I've been telling her all these years. She never listens.
Everyone: Uh-huh.
Lily: No! I had all these guys after me...and now I am all alone.
Jackson: You did have me. I was the goth guy with the really bad songs!
Lily: Yeah, but you have your other show Degrassi, full of drama and shock.
Allie: Can you hurry up Lily? (checks her watch) I have to go get a smoothie soon.
Lily: Ok. I PICK..B! Ray! I LOVE RAY!
Allie: That's correct, you win a million bucks!
Lily: Did Ray hear? Did Ray hear of my undying love for him?
(camera cuts to Grace putting earplugs and headphones on his ears)
Ray: Wait, what just happened?
Grace: (grinning so innocently) Nothing honey.
(camera cuts back to the show)
Allie: Apparently not.
Lily: OH WOE IS ME! But at least I have money...
Allie: Oh. Your check. It was eaten by that llama over there.
Llama: (chewing)
Lily: (gasp) What!
Allie: Yeah..sorry about that. Anyway, next time is TRADING SPACES WITH DEGRASSI! What will happen when 2 of the castmembers from the shows switch? FIND OUT!
Robbie: You know, that FIND OUT thing is really cheesy.
Allie: (shurgs) Couldn't think of anything to say.
Ray: Hey, what did I miss?
Lily: Nooo! Rayyyy! (sobs)
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Well, uh, that was interesting. First, if anyone thinks that I copied off someone or something, I am truely sorry. I never meant to plagarize anything, swear over my heart.
Also, I added like some people as random dudes..like Dangrassi and Brenna...I'll add other people I know, too, like in the next chapters. It'll be fuuuun...
So! Did you guys like it? Next chapter is going to be off the heazy fo sheazy!
Allie
