TITLE: "Reconcile"
FANDOM: Radio Free Roscoe
AUTHOR: Nixy
TIMELINE: Takes place after "The Awful Truth" and the season one finale, "All or Nothing" (2004).
SUMMARY: Summer between nineth and tenth grade at Roscoe High; just as the foursome try to deal with what went on at the end of the school year another problem arises.
RATING: PG-16 for M/M kissing.
DISCLAIMER: None of this belongs to me except the plot. All praise goes to Will and Douglas McRobb. Lyrics ©Smashing Pumpkins, '1979'.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I have loved this show ever since it came on Family Channel and so I decided to write a fic upon it. I cannot guarantee that it will be in character or good at all, but as long as I like it, that is all that matters. Oh yeah, because I loathe writing het, I just HAD to add one M/M moment in here. Just to make sure I am not switching over to the evilness that is het. -le smirk- Oh yes, there is a Shakespearean mention in here.. and the reference is from the 1996 version, if you can catch it.
We feel the pull
in the land of a
thousand guilts
And poured cement,
lamented and assured
It's amazing how one tiny mistake can tear apart such a strong friendship; it is even more amazing how one tiny mistake can hurt every person around you. One simple mistake can affect everyone. That is why we learn from them, make sure not to make the same mistake again and move on. No point in dwelling on it.
Yet no matter what I do, I cannot stop thinking about the afternoon when we had finally reconciled it all, only for Travis and I to mess it up again.
Who knew that kissing one of your best friends could tear an entire group of friends apart?
Weeks later, now mid-July, I am still getting glares from Audrey and her friends; Travis will not answer the phone to me and neither will Ray. Robbie has been keeping himself busy down at the studio, and all of us are confused over this series of events.
When did life get this confusing?
"Ray, hi.. it's Lily.. I just.. we.. I want to talk to you. If you are there please pick up or at least return my ca-" Lily's voice was cut off as Ray pressed the 'on' button on his blue cordless phone.
"Yeah?" was his only response as he twirled a pencil in his fingers, staring numbly at the drawing he had just completely of Lily.
"Ray uh hi.." Lily trailed off. She wasn't sure what to say now. 'Oh it is so much easier when it's an answering machine' she thought, biting her lip.
"Hey..." he drawled, scribbling his signature on the bottom right corner of the drawing before slipping it in-between the pages of the nearest notebook. Leaning back in his desk chair, he put his feet on the desk and stared at the posters that were above his desk.
"You wanted to talk to me?" he prodded after a few moments of silence.
"I, uh, yeah. I did. I do." She took a deep breath that made Ray's skin break out in gooseflesh. Rubbing his arms he got off his chair and moved to his bed, flopping down on his back.
"I don't see what else there is to say. You an Travis kissed -twice might I add- it meant something to you. I thought you had feelings for me, and it is now obvious that I've been making a fool of myself. I understand." To his surprise, tears threatened to fall. Closing his eyes tight, he whispered to himself, "Don't be such a baby".
"What was that?" came Lily's voice, reminding him that he was still on the line with her.
"It was my dad. He wants me to go do something for him.. I got to go." Hanging up, Ray dropped the phone on the bed beside himself and stared up at the ceiling. Now he was lying just so he wouldn't have to have another awkward phone conversation with Lily.
"When did I become so pathetic?" he asked himself aloud.
"A long time ago, bro. We were all too kind to just not say something."
Ray jumped at Robbie's voice. Sitting up on his bed, he saw the other teen standing in his doorway looking half-sheepish about the lame joke and half like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. In a way, it was. Robbie had been the one to mention that Lily liked him. Of course, Ray couldn't blame him.. he had asked Robbie to spill the secret.
"What can I do for you?" Ray asked, crossing his legs as Robbie shut the door and took a seat at Ray's desk.
"Lily called me earlier." Robbie nodded as he spoke. "She said she had tried to call but you wouldn't answer. She got worried and called me and I came over to see if you were still alive and kicking." he forced a smile.
"Yeah, she just called," Ray admitted, picking up the phone and staring at it.
"Oh yeah?" Robbie looked up with interest.
"Yeah and it was awkward, man. I totally choked." Ray tossed the phone back onto his bed in frustration.
Standing up, Ray walked over to his closet and rested both hands flat against it, lowering his head. "I cannot believe it. I should of told her how I felt earlier. Maybe this wouldn't of happened. She wouldn't of fallen for Travis -of all people- and I wouldn't be sitting here like some lovefool from a Shakespearean play."
Standing up, Robbie went over to his friend and turned him around to face him. "Don't blame yourself. I don't know why it happened and I never knew Lily had feelings for Travis. She told me she had feelings for you.. but said that when Travis showed up, he brought out a whole other side of her that she never knew she had."
"Women are confusing." Ray agreed, then without warning he slammed his fist into his closet, biting back a groan of pain.
Robbie just raised his eyebrow, watching Ray intently.
"You know.. This is the time in our lives where things are going to get weird and confusing." Sitting back in Ray's desk chair, Robbie put his feet up. "But sometimes you just have to let it take it's course."
"Meaning?" Ray said, rudely.
"Meaning," Robbie repeated in the same tone Ray had just used. "That maybe Lily and Travis have to make the big mistake so they can see where they went wrong and then they can get over it. Besides, you really think Lily'd be that thick to choose someone like Travis over you?"
Now it was Ray's turn to raise his eyebrow. Sitting back on the edge of his bed, flexing his sore hand, he took a moment to take everything Robbie just said in.
"You've been my best friend for years," Ray started, then stopped, deciding how best to go about it.
"I just don't don't what to think. I don't see how things will get any better; no one is trying to fix anything. I mean, look, yeah, we tried and Lily and Travis just went back to what started it all." Shaking his hand to try and shake away the dull throb he just sighed.
After a few more moments of silence Robbie came and sat beside Ray, thighs touching.
"You know," Robbie started, voice low. "Aside from having a heart of gold and a great sense of humor, you are the most amazing person I know. Things'll work out, just trust me."
Ray half-smiled to himself before looking up at Robbie, faces inches apart. "Your making my head swell," Ray said just as softly, then blushed as his mind took an unexpected twist and made his words sound like they shouldn't of.
Smirking abit, Robbie never broke his gaze. "Really now..."
It happened like the kiss between Robbie and the catty Cougar Radio DJ only.. most intense. Ray closed his eyes as Robbie's lips touched his. At first, red warning alarms went off in both their minds, but soon the fierce emotions that'd been running them all ragged; the hurt, the feelings of confusion and being lost... they all mingled together into that one kiss.
Breaking apart, Ray's eyes widened with shock as Robbie just stared, looking a cross between satisfied and confused.
"Did that just-"
"N-no, man, it was just a-"
"We kissed."
"Oh no."
"I can't believe it." came Lily's voice from the doorway.
Neither had heard it open and both jumped from the bed.
She had tears in her already-red eyes. Clearly she had been crying well before she got to Ray's.
"I came here to apologize, but now.." she shook her head, letting out a choked sob. Her hand rushed to cover her mouth as Lily ran from the doorway, her footsteps thumping down the stairs, front door slamming.
Ray rushed to his bedroom window in time to see her running down the driveway and hopping on her bike, wobbling down the street.
"Damn." he cursed, about to punch his windowframe before remembering his fist was still sore from the closet and from punching the wall where Travis had been the day he'd first found out about Lily and Travis' kiss.
That summer passed by slowly for the four; Travis spent his time working in the studio, changing the locks so none of the others could come in; Lily spent the days locked in her bedroom with a box of kleenex, her guitar and a notebook filled with every song she'd written in those weeks.
Ray basically played Playstation in the daytime, pretending things were fine, but spent his evenings and sleepless nights drawing and staring at his cordless phone that hadn't rung for him since Lily had called that last night he'd seen her.
Robbie got a summer job at the local radio station and had his own half-hour of airtime but even that couldn't fill in the gap that he had now that his three best friends were no longer talking to him, or each other. He also tore himself apart about what drove him to kiss Ray. He wasn't gay... Least, he didn't think he was. He still liked girls.
It was one of the worst summers the four had ever had, and all of them dreaded the coming school year. Who would they hang with? What would they do now that RFR was down the drain? What if they had the same classes or bumped into each other in the halls? It was one nightmare after another, but they knew that eventually, things would work themselves out.
"Highschool is one of the biggest and longest emotional rollar-coaster rides of your life. You'll lose some friends and gain some more. Boys and girls will break each other's hearts, but in the end, things will work out for the better. You just got to make it happen and learn from the mistakes you've made."
Nodding at the empty room, Question Mark spoke again. "This is Question Mark and thank you for listening to the last ever RFR broadcast. Good evening and good bye."
Taking off his headset, Robbie got up and walked into the control room where Travis usually was. Flicking all of the switches, he turned off the control panel, the frequency and other switches leaving the room bathed in darkness; the only light coming from the sun that was setting behind all the buildings around the studio.
Shrugging his jacket on, Robbie took one final look around the studio before stepping outside and locking the door. Pocketing the key he headed up the metal staircase and shoved his hands deep in to his pockets as he headed home.
No, he wasn't happy, but he had just made the biggest step in moving on and for that he felt a bit better.
Lily let the radio hiss and fuzz as the frequency shut off to reveal dead air. She let out the breath she'd been holding and just stared as tears fell for what seemed like the millionth time that summer.
Wiping her eyes with her hand, she picked up her guitar and began to strum out a melancholy tune, her voice sombre and low as she sang.
Travis flipped the radio off and grabbed his jacket, slamming his bedroom door shut. Heading downstairs he nodded to his parents.
"Did you leave anything behind?"
"No." Travis said, looking up at his room where his old-fashioned radio was.
"Just some bad memories is all." He climbed into the moving truck and settled back with his discman; it was a long drive to where they were moving, but starting over fresh would do him good.
Ray had been even more sullen since the last broadcast of RFR and it showed. His father tried to spend more time with him and his mother kept baking his favorite desserts in hopes that he would smile at least once. His brother even stopped him one day in the kitchen to give Ray advice; as grateful as he was, he knew he would have to get over it all his self.
Carefully, he took down every photograph he had of Lily, Robbie, Travis and him and put them inside of a shoebox along with every thing else that reminded him of the old group. Stashing the box beneath his bed, Ray pulled his bookbag over to his lap and checked to make sure he had everything in it for the next day.
It would be the first day of grade ten, and the chance to start over. He wasn't going to mess it up.
f i n
