Severus Snape sat alone in his small office in the Dungeons of Hogwarts contemplating his future. Once he had never imagined that he would have a future but that was before the Dark Lord's final defeat. Before the letters lying on the desk before him. Before her visit to tell him of his future obligation. Severus rolled the idea around in his head, deciding he could not think of this as an obligation. To do that he would need to change the way he thought and the way he acted. With the Dark Lord gone this would be relatively easy... Ha.
Indeed when Potter had turned up with the diary no one had suspected this had been the cause of the sudden shift in the magical atmosphere around the school and other prominent magical communities and places. Indeed Ministry experts had turned up to find the source of the disturbance that had been shown the diary had laughed. After careful examination of the diary by himself and experts from the Department of Mysteries the ministry was forced to concede that the diary had been a Horcrux of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and with its destruction by Potter he too had been forever removed from earth. This had resulted in Potter becoming a hero to the world all over again. Much to Severus's consternation Potter was for once enjoying and even encouraging the belief of himself as a Hero. This had resulted in a lot of problems for the Professors, for this newfound arrogance had led to several arguments over what his responsibilities as a student were. It was that bad that he actually wished that his Father, the other Potter, were alive.
"At least he I could deal with him." Severus said to the empty room.
Indeed the only furnishings were his small work desk, two plain wooden chairs and a multitude of bookcase straining under the weight of the books and notes encased in them. The low ceiling made it seem like the bookcase were holding the roof up instead of the books. The last feature of his office was a large ornamental fireplace, carved from ebony the edging looked like a giant snake. It was this feature of his office that Severus strode around his desk to lean against. The snake seemed to slither under his touch but he ignored this staring intently into the empty grate. Lost in memories of long ago.
When Severus finally brought himself back to the here and now he turned back to look at his desk. On it were four letters, penned thirteen years ago. Letters for him, from a longlost friend and his old school enemies. It seemed so long ago now, though the memories still pained him Severus felt that after this he may never be able to hold a grudge again. Indeed two of the letters had been very straight forward. Containing just one word - Sorry. It was more than James Potter and Remus Lupin had ever managed whilst the former had been alive but if he was honest with himself, it meant more to him then the idea of them grovelling on their knees. The third letter was from Sirius Black and had been slightly longer. All it said was -
They weren't involved. I did it of my accord. Hate me if you must but they don't deserve it. I'm Sorry.
That was all it took to convince Severus that their words were sincere. Then something he thought impossible occurred. The Fourth letter not only increased his guilt but reduced him to tears, something that had not happened since the letter writer had passed. He still could hardly believe that Lily would choose him to receive her last correspondence. Not her sister or her son. Him. Once again the words she had written for him raced through his mind.
Dear Sev,
It has been a long time. To long I think. If this letter finds its way to you then the unthinkable has occurred and I will never get the chance to say something to you I should have said before. As you are probably aware I am not the only one. Though if they are using these letters to taunt you one last time then you have my full permission to hate them for the rest of eternity... Sev, I'm Sorry. For everything. For not helping you more. For not accepting your apology. For not being there when you needed me. For hating you. And for not understanding how you felt. I have never been sorrier in my entire life. Not even for what happened with Tuney. You deserve better. If we both survive this war then I intend to find you and give you this in person. You should know that I have never had a better best friend (no not even James has ever come close). You are the best person I know and no matter what happens that will never change... But you need to. You deserve to be happy and to have people who know the real you. When this letter finds you I have no doubt that you will have done everything to push everyone away. Well Severus Tobias Snape it ends with this letter. It is time to let people in. Time to let prejudice go. Time for you to let people know the real you. I am not asking you to bare your soul to the world, just those you trust. Those who can keep the mouths shut as tight as Tuney is wound up. Please live your life. For me. It is all I ask. That way when I see you next, you will wear a smile on your face brighter than the Headmaster's robes at Christmas. That way I won't feel so guilty and perhaps you will be able to forgive me. For not giving you a second chance. I will always be your friend Sev. I love you. Goodbye.
He swore he would never be able to get those words out of his head. They had been burned there. He had never expected that words would hurt him more than the ones she had thrown at him in their fifth year. He felt guilty for the pain she had felt. The paper still held her tear stains. Her words would stay with him forever and he would gladly do as she asked. It would be painful but he had known from the first time he saw Lily Evans he would do anything she asked. Including change. Severus Snape would let them all know who he really was. It would probably kill him. He had no other choice. He would start by telling all he knew about the death eaters. He owed her and Potter that much. But that would have to wait for a little while. He had more pressing matters.
This brought him back to his visitor. She had brought the letters and tragic news for a member of the castle. He had hoped that it would never come to this but he could not and would not break the agreement he had made eight years earlier. It would be rough but he had already decided to change and attempt to be nicer to people. Attempt was a good word for it. He did not believe it would work but with the news he had just received he did not have much choice. Severus looked around the office once more. It lacked personality and personal items much like his home. This too would have to change. Perhaps she would be his first real friend since Lily and who knew she may be the person he had waited for, to help him move on.
He did not regret his agreement but thought his old friend might. This was Severus's last thought as he swept from his office and towards the Headmaster's office. Towards his unknown future.
Hermione Granger had absolutely no idea why she had been summoned to the Headmaster's office late on a Sunday afternoon. All she knew was that Nearly Headless Nick had shown up in the library to tell her that the Headmaster required her presence as soon as she could attend. Having no homework she had decided to get this done with and left immediately. Leaving Nick to watch her retreating back. She had thought he looked sad and desperate to come with her but Hermione had decided that she must be imagining things and pressed on.
It wasn't until Hermione had reached the gargoyle that led to Professor Dumbledore's office that she realised that Nick had not given her the password. And people thought she was a genius. Ha. If they could see her now. Or at any time in the last fortnight really. But that was not the current problem. She knew the headmaster liked muggle sweets but finding the right one could take forever. Just as she was beginning to give up hope she heard someone approaching. Ignoring the urge to run and hoping it was a teacher, Hermione spun round to find...
Professor Snape. This would not end well. She was sure to lose points or worse get a detention. That was the last thing she needed. Yet he did not look like the teacher that usually stalked the halls looking for students to prey on. Come to think of it he wasn't even stalking and he appeared to be holding himself differently. So intrigued by this new Professor Snape it took Hermione awhile to realise that he was standing in front of her giving her a questioning look.
When Hermione snapped out of her trance she managed to stutter out, "Professor Snape... I didn't mean to... I swear I didn't mean... I'm sorry." She then looked at the ground waiting for the sneer, scathing comment and punishment that he would undoubtedly produce. It never came.
Professor Snape had stood there looking at the only student in the entire school he truly considered to have intelligence enough to be worthy of note. It seemed that he was already changing and she was the first to notice. As he waited patiently for her to stop staring he thought about how to deal with this situation. He only succeeded in having a mental blank broken by the girl's stuttered apology. At least she had the decency to look sheepish.
To the shock of both Severus's response was to sigh. Hermione's head snapped up at this. No remark about loitering in the halls. No nasty remark about her staring and subsequent loss of speech. This was strange.
To cover for his 'accident' as anyone he had met before would have called it Severus cleared his throat and redirected her attention towards her original purpose.
"I believe, considering your location that you wish to see the Headmaster Miss Granger?"
Hermione gave him a wary look, waiting for the real Snape to leap out and start hurling insults and deducting points before replying, " Yes, Professor. I was summoned but no one told me the password."
Severus looked at her, shook his head and strode forwards to give the password.
"Sherbet Lemon" he said in a voice just loud enough for Hermione to hear him and as the gargoyle sprung aside he turned to face her and said in what he hoped was a polite and not condescending tone.
"After you."
Hermione blinked and moved forward cautiously waiting for the attack that she realised probably wasn't coming. She wondered, as the stair case took them slowly up why Snape was being polite, indeed almost kind to her. Because of this she did not notice when they had reached the top and Severus was forced to clear his throat to catch her attention. The sight at the top of the stairs shocked her.
Not only was the Headmaster standing in the foyer to his office, with Snapes arrival all the Heads of House were present as well as a young woman with brown mousey coloured hair, wearing a large overcoat as if she had travelled a long distance to be here. Upon the arrival of Snape all the adults turned to look at Hermione. As if this were some sort of cue Professor Dumbledore approached Hermione before speaking to her.
"Miss Granger there is an old friend of yours waiting in my office to speak to you privately before our meeting." As he spoke there was a twinge of sadness to his voice.
She noticed the sadness in his voice and that his eyes were missing their usual twinkle. All this information lead her to ask in a very small voice, "Why?"
"I believe she will explain this to you." Dumbledore responded in the same gentle tone he had used before. He then strode over and held the door open for her and gestured for her to enter.
As Hermione strode forwards she thought she saw all of them looking at her quite sadly. Privately Hermione was wondering whether she was walking to her death because the staring at her like she was going to die was getting quite irritating. That was when she realised Snape had that same look on his face when they were in the hallway. Her trance was broken by the door clicking shut behind her.
Hermione then looked around for this 'friend'. She noticed the high ceiling, Fawkes perch, the bookshelves, the silver instruments, the Headmaster's desk and a person sitting on the doorway side of the desk waiting for her. She knew that person. Not that she was hard to recognise. The dragon hide boots and jacket coupled with blue denim jeans and purple t-shirt gave her away immediately. As the person turned around there was no mistaking her now. The short brown hair cut into a layered bob hung loose around her face. Her muddy brown eyes locking with Hermione's. For a moment neither of them moved nor spoke.
Then Hermione asked her voice full of disbelief, "Sarah?"
