A/N: Sooooo, a word of warning. This is my first plunge into the 'Torchwood' world. I've been INSANELY anxious to type this fic for days now, and today I finally got the chance to.
WARNINGS: SLASH, some language, drinking, general oddness… (smirks)
DISCLAIMER: Oh, if only…! Just one thing. If I DID own anything, Ianto wouldn't have died before getting the chance to grow old and gray.
Now, folks… I've gotta get going before I'll chicken out. I REALLY hope that you'll enjoy the ride!
A Ghost of You
Jack Harkness was a flirt. Always had been. But on that seemingly endless night he sat drunk out of his mind and alone in a bar, which was becoming a annoyingly common occurrence. And in his hands was a note that held a stranger's name someone else had fished out for him.
Had he really become so pathetic that the Time Lord himself saw the need to play a matchmaker for him?
Well, he wouldn't have been Jack Harkness if he didn't even try. And so he perfected his most charming grim. Determined to feel… normal, even if only for a little while.
"Know what I'm thinking right now?"
"Oh yeah…"
The easy air, loaded with intoxication and flirt, lasted until Jack really looked at his companion. At the expression on the man's face, focusing on the smile. Into those eyes.
There was just too much Ianto, there.
Jack wasn't sure what he muttered as an excuse or if he said anything at all. But all of a sudden he'd stumbled his way to the hallway in which the toilets located. He leaned his back heavily against the wall and buried his face in his hands, focusing hard on breathing.
The flood of memories crashed through him slowly and painfully. Peeling off a part of him in a way even he couldn't recover from. And then it was over, leaving a nagging, aching hollowness into him. He honestly couldn't decide which part was worse.
When Jack eventually returned to the bar he was somewhat stunned to notice that Alonso was still there, staring at another drink deep in thought. Jack had two options. To walk out, or to carry on. Always the soldier, he pushed himself forward.
Jack cleared his throat upon sitting down once more. It was one of those very, very rare and incredibly infuriating moments when he had no idea what to say. "Ehm… Sorry, about that." Well, it was a start.
Alonso shrugged. Fortunately the man didn't seem too offended. "Must've been one hell of a guy, to make you drink like that to forget."
"I'm… not drinking to forget", Jack pointed out. He couldn't understand why he felt the need to share it with a stranger and there was just enough alcohol in his system to keep him from caring. "I'm drinking so that I bear remembering." There. How pathetic was that?
"Why?"
Jack looked away, gritting his teeth hard. The thoughts and memories spinning around in his head… They were much too precious to be shared with a stranger. "Because it was one of the few things he ever asked of me."
Upon looking towards his companion Jack discovered that one of Alonso's eyebrows was arched. "So… He was expecting you to hang on to his memory for the rest of your life? That sounds like a cruel final request."
Jack blinked twice, quickly. Something close to alarm flaring to life in his drunken mind. "How…?"
Alonso shrugged and focused on his drink once more. Then downed it with a single gulp, wincing a bit at the aftershock. "I'm kind of a psychic, too."
Jack was too worn down by the drinks he'd consumed and sleepless nights to question further. Maybe he'd even be able to sleep tonight. He ordered another drink, just to be safe.
While his request was being fulfilled Jack swallowed. And finally found his voice. "It wasn't cruel", he argued, dangerously close to making it sharp. "No one… No one deserves to be just a blip in time."
Alonso was quiet for a moment. Seemed to think hard or hesitate. "Did you love him?"
/ "I love you."
"Don't…!" / Don't say goodbye!
The ache was almost more than Jack could take and he shuddered. Where the hell was his drink? "Yes."
He didn't tell it to Ianto back then because it would've sounded too much like a goodbye, like a permission to give in. He didn't want those words to be tainted by something so cruel and bitter. If he'd known that it was his last chance…
"Don't worry. He knew." Their drinks arrived, whenever Alonso ordered another for himself being a mystery. The stranger lifted his shot and looked at him expectantly. "To those who are… more than just blips in time."
Well, Jack drank gladly to that.
Once they were done they sat in a rather companionable silence, letting alcohol burn in their mouths. Both of them lingering in their own thoughts. So close, yet very far.
Jack surprised himself with being the one to break the silence. "Who was it for you?" Meeting confusion he elaborated. "The one you lost."
There was something sad and incredibly, disturbingly familiar on Alonso's face all of a sudden. The man sighed. "It's… a long and confusing story. One neither of us is up for tonight." The stranger offered him a small, quick smile. "Look… It's been a pleasure. But… I don't think we'll get any further tonight, with how wasted we are." Alonso paid for his drinks, and a couple of Jack's. "Maybe I'll buy you coffee next time."
It definitely wasn't like Jack to just give up, even if he'd already been offered a second round. But he didn't exactly feel like being the mighty Harkness tonight. So he nodded, letting his shoulders slump a little. Until a thought crossed his mind. "Wait!" He frowned at the man who'd already been walking away. "Aren't you even going to ask my name?" How were they supposed to meet again if the other didn't have that much?
Alonso chuckled like he'd just said something very amusing. "I already know it, Jack." With that the man hauled himself up, a warm, surprisingly soft hand caressing Jack's briefly. "Now finish that one, go home and sleep. You need to stop torturing yourself at some point."
Jack nodded slowly and looked away once more. Maybe he'd had enough to close his eyes without seeing… "Goodnight, Alonso."
"Goodnight, sir", a suddenly eerily familiar voice half whispered, barely carrying over the noise of the bar. "I'll see you soon. Maybe then I'll be wearing a suit again."
Jack's eyes flew wide and his hand tightened convulsively around the drink he'd been holding. He turned his head as fast as he could but it wasn't enough. The stranger was gone.
Still, somehow and impossibly, for the first time in who knows how long hope began to blossom in Jack's heart.
"Ianto?"
End.
A/N: Oh boy… I just couldn't resist the opportunity to give those two another chance. Maybe. Possibly.
Soooo… How was that? Any good at all? PLEASE, do let me know!
In any case… Thank you so much for reading! Who knows, maybe I'll be seeing you later.
Take care!
