Dislamer : I dont own Twilight or any of its characters
I also don't own License and Registration by Death Cab For Cutie.
Please review!! That would be awesome thanks )
I never thought, in a million years that I would be the one to make Edward break his promise.
Looking into my rear view, I can see him, standing in the open door of his silver volvo still looking bewildered, and hurt. I tare my eyes away to stare straight ahead of me at the road. Not really even just the road, I was stareing straight into my future without the Cullens. Without Edward. The future that looks just as bleak and hard as the pavement my tires are, in some small way, crushing the farther and farther I drive. In an attempt to take my mind off of what I will probably consider the biggest mistake of my life, I switch the radio on letting the music run over me, and then the tears begin to fall. I refuse to let myself break down, not here, not when he's still only a few blocks away. Shaking my head, I take a quick glance around the truck, and my eyes land on the glove compartment.
The glove compartment isn't accurately named
And everybody knows it.
So I'm proposing a swift orderly change.
I glance back at the compartment every few minutes, something Edward had called out as I turned my truck on and let the loud grumbling of my engine drown everything out. I didn't quite catch the exact words, all I'd caught was compartment, pictures, and how he'll always love me. "Isabella Marie Swan, I will always love you" His velvet smooth voice keeps repeating the line over and over and over in my head, making what I was doing even more near impossible. I couldn't stay though, he knew it, I knew it, Carlisle Esme Alice Rosalie Emmet Jasper, they all knew it. It was a charade that we could no longer keep going. A human and a vampire in love? Its just crazy and I think, from the beginning we both knew this day would come. He knew it before I did, I knew it soon after, but I just didnt want to ever believe it would truly happen.
Cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all i find are souvenirs from better times
Before the gleam of your taillights fading east
To find yourself a better life.
Raindrops. That is what snaps me out of my reverie of emotions and memories. Leaning a little over my steering wheel, I glance up at the sky and the menacing clouds over head. Nothing to unusual, just typical weather for Forks, Washington, but it so uncanilly matches my mood and the mood I left behind that I can't help but let out a laugh, it is still a laugh no matter the amount of hysteria that coats it. I've finally made it out of Forks, and I keep driving even though I have absolutly no idea where I am headed or what lay before me in the direction I am going. Signs fly past. Signs stating the speed limit, turn offs, construction and detours. I pay no attention to any of it though. That is until I hear the sirens and see the flashing red and blue lights in my rearview mirror.
I was searching for some legal document
As the rain beat down on the hood
When i stumbled upon pictures i tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head
Slamming my hands on my steering wheel, I signal and pull over to the right hand side of the road, putting my car in park I quickley roll down my window and wait. Within seconds an officer has appeared at my window. "Evenin' Ma'am." He tips his hat towards me. Looking up I nod in response. "Officer." my voice sounds emotionless. "License and registration please." He recits, a line that he's said to so many others like myself.
Reaching over I open my glove compartment to search for my registration, as I do so my gaze lands on a lone picture. It is of Edward, the night of my eighteenth birthday. He is standing in my living room waiting for me to finnish getting ready to go over to the Cullens place. I shake my head as the officer at my window clears his throat, clearly not pleased with how long I am taking. I quickley grab my registration, which lay right beside the picture, and shut the compartment with a little to much force. Ignoring the questioning look on said officers face, I hand over my registration then take my license out of my purse and hand that to him as well. I don't hear anything the officer says as he writes my ticket and hands it back to me, with a nod of his hat and a smile. "Have a nice evenin ma'am, and drive careful now. I wouldn't wanna be scrapin a pretty thing like you off the highway." and with that he returns to his cruiser parked right behind me.
Cause it's too important
To stay the way it's been
I wait until he pulls away, watching as the taillights of his cruiser fade into the distance. Thats when I let it all come out. I begin to cry hysterically, throwing the ticket, my registration and license into the glove compartment. Finally I lay my head on my steering wheel, as I let the tears and sobs rock through my body, until they begin to come out in small little bursts and hiccoughs. "Oh Edward... I'm sorry, I'm so so so sorry. I can't do this anymore" I cry out, reaching over I wrench the glove compartment door open and grab the picture. Holding it out in front of me, his words begin again flowing through my mind his velvety voice calming my nerves. "Isabella Marie Swan, I will always love you" over and over, I grasp the picture tightley to my chest as the tears taper off enough so that I can continue driving. I never put the picture down, keeping it in my hand and glancing at it every once and awhile as I finally begin driving again.
There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night
Knowing there is no way I can continue on with all the crying I had done making myself unbelievably tired, I pull into a motel on the side of road. The only thing I really remember is parking my car, and then suddenly I'm standing in the room I have payed for. Not even bothering to turn any lights on and barely glancing at my surroundings, I throw my bag on the floor, and in turn collapse on the motel bed. I let myself think of the last moment I saw him. Standing at his silver volvo, looking so helpless and hurt and confused, and I begin to sob again rolling onto my left side while bringing my legs up and wrapping my arms around myself. I knew I wasn't going to sleep much tonight, so I let myself think, and cry as the hole in my chest tears itself open again. This time, though, I have only myself to blame.
There's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
And here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
Lying awake at night (up all night)
When i'm lying awake at night.
