A very cruel oneshot I came up with. In the universe of this story, everyone is a human. I aged them up to make them old enough to get part-time jobs. Stumpy and Quack Quack are fourteen years old, and Kaeloo, Mr. Cat and Pretty are sixteen.
Kaeloo, Stumpy, Quack Quack and Mr. Cat were lounging around in their living room. "It's a boring day today," said Kaeloo. "Why don't we play a game, buddies?" "Okay! What do we play?" asked Stumpy. "How about a tea party?" "Too girly!" said Stumpy and Mr. Cat. "Scrabble?" "Boring!" "Swimming?" "Quack," said Quack Quack, reminding Kaeloo that they didn't have a pool. "How about darts?" she asked. "We don't have a dartboard, green-bean," Mr. Cat said, using one of his nicknames to refer to her green hair. "We can buy one, Mr. Cat!" suggested Kaeloo. "We can pool in our money!" "Quack," said Quack Quack, explaining that he'd spent his allowance on yogurt. "The latest Mr. Coolskin game got released yesterday and I bought it, so I don't have any money either," said Stumpy. "Mr. Cat?" asked Kaeloo. "I'm broke," he lied. "Sorry, buddies, I don't have any either," confessed Kaeloo. A lightbulb went on above her head. "I know! We can all get jobs! That way, we can earn the money to buy ourselves a dartboard!"
The main four started their jobs at a fast food restaurant. Even though the restaurant was known for punishing bad employees in cruel ways, it paid enough to buy what they wanted. Their boss was a very rude, demanding man who kept yelling at them, but they had to endure it since they needed the money. "Always serve your customers with a smile on your face!" he had reminded them. The gang stood at the counter waiting for their first customer. Someone walked inside. The main four took one look at her and were absolutely horrified. It was Pretty.
"Hello, Pretty!" said Kaeloo. "Hey, losers," Pretty replied. "I see you got jobs." "Yeah, we're trying to make money!" explained Stumpy. "Luckily for me, I'd never need to get a job since my family is rich," she bragged. Trying not to get angry, Kaeloo forced a smile. "What would you like to have?" she asked. "Could I have Mr. Cat?" Pretty inquired. "No," replied Mr. Cat, flatly. "Alright, I'll have a hamburger with no pickles, some fries and a chocolate milkshake," said Pretty. Quack Quack ran to the kitchen and got the food she ordered. "I changed my mind," Pretty said. "Now I want a double cheeseburger and a large soda." Stumpy went to get Pretty's food. Pretty took some powder from her makeup bag and put it on the floor. The powder made the floor all slippery, so Stumpy slipped and the food spilled all over him. Pretty snapped a picture of him and put it on Fakebook. "My followers will love this!" she said, laughing cruelly. "This has gone too far," Kaeloo whispered to the other three, and they nodded their heads in agreement. "We'll be right back, Pretty," said Kaeloo, and she and the others went to the kitchen to discuss what to do.
The main four returned. "Here you go, Pretty," said Kaeloo. "We'll let you have the Super Special Surprise Meal!" "What's a Super Special Surprise Meal?" With huge, forced smiles on their faces, they decided to explain it. Stumpy brought in a giant box and Quack Quack loaded the ingredients in it as Kaeloo explained: "Five pounds of raw fish, some giant onion rings, and super secret sauce!" "Yuck!" said Pretty, and she paused. "Wait, what's in the sauce?" she asked. "I made it!" said Stumpy. Suddenly, the main four grabbed Pretty and shoved her in the box with all the ingredients and taped it shut. "Let me go!" yelled Pretty. "Oh, did you say you wanted that to go?" asked Kaeloo, pretending she hadn't heard what Pretty said. "Okay!" Mr. Cat picked up the box and, defying the laws of physics, stuffed it into his bazooka before launching it into the air. The main four high-fived each other, laughing. Suddenly, their boss appeared behind them. "Uh-oh..." they said in unison, realizing that they were in a lot of trouble.
Pinned to a dartboard, the four friends tried to dodge the darts that were being thrown at them by an automatic dart-throwing machine. The punishment was harsh, but hey, this restaurant was known for harshly punishing its employees. "Well, at least we got a dartboard, huh, buddies?" Kaeloo nervously laughed. Everyone glared at her, causing her to shut up.
Well, that's all there is to this story! I know it's cruel, but if you think about it, when have the main four ever won anything without a pyrrhic victory coming into play for at least one of them?
