"What is it about the guy?" the words poured from Howard's lip as easily as the scotch he was swirling in his glass. Peggy looked up and saw the moment that the realization penetrated his alcohol soaked fog. The present tense could no longer be used about Steve. He was gone. Howard stumbled and trembled through an attempt to make it right for a moment and when he couldn't, he looked away and finished off the rest of the amber liquid in one fell swoop. "Damn it. I'm sorry Peg. I…"

"It was the way he looked at me."

Howard looked up, startled. Peggy hadn't talked about Steve at all since that night. He'd asked. Expressed concern. But each time the subject was broached, he had watched her walls fly up. It was almost like he could see them strengthen, thicken, and he knew that there would be no cracks. Steve had breached those walls but Howard doubted anyone else ever would. She swallowed the scotch he'd poured for her and set her glass down in front of him with a firm clunk. Her big eyes were expectant and he filled the glass to its brim. She raised an eyebrow and he chuckled.

"It's just us Peg. Let loose."

She took the glass, shot him a smile, and swallowed a gulp of liquor. Each of her movements were precise. Decisive. She'd opened the door. There was no point in opening it if one didn't intend to go through.

"He was different than everyone else. All the other men." Howard nodded. Everyone knew that Steve was different. He stood out long before any serum had been injected into his veins. "I'm used to men looking at me. After all, I am an anomaly here. A woman amongst the troops? Handling a gun? It's odd."

"And fabulous." Howard couldn't stop the word from leaving his lips and for a moment, he worried that he'd shattered the tenuous moment between them. But then she looked up at him and she smiled. His heart settled.

"Not everyone thinks so Howard. Most men look at me with something of lust in their eyes. What can they get from me? Can I be an accomplishment for them? A medal? Others hate me. I know that. They don't want to take orders from a woman. Or they only think I'm capable of bringing them coffee." The corners of her mouth trembled into a weak facsimile of a smile as she stared into her glass. She swirled the rich liquid into a small turbulent whirlpool before she took another solid gulp. "But Steve…" her voice trembled, the tears fighting for their due representation. "He looked at me differently." She lifted her chocolate brown gaze to his. "Each time he looked at me it was like…." She swallowed hard. "like there was something more to me. Something no one else saw. And he treasured it. He didn't want anything from me. He just wanted…" the words strangled in her throat and the tears took their rightful place.

"To love you Peg. He wanted to love you. To cherish you. To treasure you. That was what Steve wanted for you." He listened to her gasping for breath, trying to control the tears instead of letting them control her. "We all saw it every time he looked at you."

Peggy put down her glass and started patting her pockets, looking for a tissue. Howard pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and settled himself next to her, arm slung casually across the back of her seat. He watched her wipe her eyes, still fighting for control and felt his heart crumble. There was a void in the world. Steve's loss had torn a black hole in the fabric of her universe. And now his absence threatened to suck everything within proximity into the vacuum along with him. Well, he'd be damned if he let Peggy Carter dissolve into her grief. She had too much to offer. She could change the world. Steve would want that for her.

He wrapped his arm around Peggy's shoulders. She stiffened and pulled back, not ready to let the tears have their way. But then he felt the shudder run through her as all of the emotion broke and fell apart. The sobs convulsed through her body as her tears soaked through his shirt. Howard wrapped his arms tight around her and for what must have been the millionth time, mentally ran through the possible routes Steve may have taken. Did he miss anything? Was Steve wandering out there? Cold? Hopeful? Was he waiting for them to come to him? The questions roared through his mind and threatened to pull him into the void as well.

Even when her tears calmed to a slow roll, Howard didn't let go. He felt Peggy relax against him, her sniffles now intermittent and soft. She lifted her head from his chest but didn't pull away from his arms. She put a hand on his cheek.

"You know he admired you Howard. He talked all the time about how brilliant you were. We are lucky to have you."

Howard closed his eyes and shook his head. "I'm just a guy. I make stuff better. Rogers…he made people better."

Peggy smiled and with that, she pulled away. She tugged the bottom of her shirt straight and brushed her hair away from her face. "That's beautiful Howard. It's exactly what Steve did." She swiped at her wet cheeks with the handkerchief.

Then suddenly, it hit him. If he believed in ghosts, he'd say Rogers had whispered it in his ear. He had the chance to take the rumpled, tattered pieces of her world and pull it together into something new. Something that she could pour herself into instead of the grief. With this idea, they could actually change the world.

"Then that's what we're gonna do Peggy."

She pushed away even further and retrieved her glass with one last sniffle. Then she tipped it and drained the rest while Howard watched. When the last drop was gone, she set the glass on the table in front of them with a decisive thunk. She turned to look at the world's most famous millionaire playboy.

"What are you nattering on about now Howard?"

"I've got some ideas about how we can keep his vision alive. Make the world a better place."

"Oh?" Peggy, calm and cool, lifted an eyebrow. If it weren't for the red splotches and swollen eyes, Howard would think he had imagined all of it. "Do tell."