Chapter 1

Author Note: Okay so this may be a rather controversial fanfic. I was re-reading Eclipse by the wonderful Stephanie Meyer the other day, neared the end and decided that I wanted to know what would have happen if Bella had chosen Jacob. Therefore I decided to write it myself. Please don't hate me, I love Edward but then I like Jacob too. Please read and review at the end to let me know that you think. If you like it I'll carry on but I need your feed back PLEASE!

I hope you don't find it too distressing!

SM

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the beginning extract in italics.

Beginning extract taken from 'Eclipse' by Stephanie Meyer at the fight between Edward and Victoria towards the end.

'Though she spared Riley no farewell glance, Victoria seemed to realise that she was on her own. She began to back away from Edward, frenzied disappointment, blazing in her eyes. She threw me one short, agonized stare of longing, and then she started to retreat faster.

"No," Edward crooned, his voice seductive. "Stay just a little longer."

She wheeled and flew towards the refuge of the forest like and arrow from a bow.

But Edward was faster - a bullet from a gun.

He caught her unprotected back at the edge of the trees and, with one last, simple step, the dance was over.'

Or so I thought. I all happen so fast, I want quite sure I was aware of what went on. The burning sensation of my own blood pouring out of my arm was not enough to keep my eyes away from the combat. I was only just able to tell which vampire was which as both entities moved to fast to track any progress made. Victoria had wheeled around and continued to dance, now even keener to edge as close as she could in my direction. The only difference I could spot was the flickering fire surrounding Victoria's perfect face.

Had I blinked, I was sure I would have missed the move. Even as my body shivered where I stood, I was unable to run or even take my eyes off the two vampires. I saw the whole, earth destroying scene play out right in front of my eyes. The end was inevitably drawing near, although neither Edward nor Victoria appeared to have the upper hand. Too concerned for my welfare instead of his own life, Edward shot me a quick, reassuring glance. I would be the last face of love he would see. Although Edward had lasted this far by pre-empting Victoria's moves; this small, single lapse in concentration switched an invisible light on in Victoria's head. She was completely taken over by instincts, more then I thought possible. It seemed that although vampires gave parts of themselves over to their natural instincts in order to fight to any real degree, it had seemed that they both kept an edge of control that reminded them of the intentions and the reasoning behind it. Victoria's sudden release of everything meant she reacted quicker then thinking, almost to fast for Edward to 'hear' her. Her arm swung out, aiming right for Edward's throat. He, only just quick enough to react instead of defending himself, did exactly the same thing.

Time suddenly slowed. I was unprepared for the abrupt halt and I nearly faltered, only just holding my arm out in time to stop myself from collapsing to the ground. What I saw, I never would have believed possible had I not witnessed it myself.

Victoria and Edward's arms swung out slowly towards each others vulnerable throats. They hit their marks at exactly the same time and the force of both blows cracked my entire world in two. Edward's arm hacked straight through Victoria's neck; the sound almost unbearable had me wincing with physical pain. Victoria's baby face, with her swirling red hair, fell silently to the soft earth. It was followed by the soft thump of another head. Next to fall were the limp, lifeless bodies of both mythical nightmares, one being my personal heaven.

I lost control of my limbs. Even though previously locked in place by shear terror at the scene in front of me, I know mimicked the other bodies and fell limply to ground.

"Edward!" My voice was barely a whisper. The world began to shake and blur as if it too wracked and trembled with sobs like my own, fragile bones.

Edward was……… No, he couldn't be. It was all simply a very horribly, vivid nightmare that I would wait to wake from. He promised he would never leave me again so when I woke, I would be locked there, in his ice-hard arms. I would look up to meet his adoring gaze and he would speak softly and comfortingly; life would go on as normal, what ever that was.

"EDWARD!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, forcing the sound out so it burned my throat with acid. I blinked furiously several times to clear my vision but wished I hadn't. Both the bodies of Victoria and Edward lay twitching, arms grasping out at anything, neither having peace even in death.

I felt my stomach contract and I only just leaned over in time to avoid the worst of my vomit. I urged and coughed, acid spilling from my lips, burning my insides. The salty tears seared in my eyes and I felt like scratching them out. I dragged myself a few feet away and collapsed on the dank earth. I lay on my back, my limbs askew revolting against the uncomfortable position but not quite loud enough to numb the other pains in my mind. The hole that had disappeared as soon as Edward had come back tore open, shredding my organs, and my breathing became laboured. I didn't even attempt to hold myself together. I didn't care if I fell apart, at least it would end my suffering. I stared up at the tree tops which continued to spin and tremble before my eyes until the world went.

Darkness engulfed me. I felt nothing. Not the shaking as I cried or the wind biting at my skin. I heard nothing of the surrounding forest, not even my own breath heaving in and out of my chest. I forgot my own name, where I was or where I came from. I didn't know what I was anymore. I was simply a collection of cells. No mind, conscious feelings, thinking. I had become nothing. I had no beginning, no middle and no end. I felt no emotion, not fear, anguish, happiness or sadness. I didn't know what feelings were.

Where I was there was no time, noting to measure and nothing to measure it with. Is did nothing but exist. Existed as something I didn't understand but knew it was something real, tangible.