Chapter 1: You have to lie to tell the truth
Disclaimer: It's awkward that I don't own awkward haha.
"Really Tamara stop doing that" I mumble under my breath to her.
I bury my head in my pillow, trying to drown out any word she says about some new guy.
"Jenna, Jenna are you listening?" she ask as I fee her hand on my rib slightly rocking me back and forth.
"No" I shout out, still keeping my head buried in my pillow.
I'm tired of hearing her talked about how she is always trying to sleep with some guy.
She takes her hand off my rib and gasps "that's so mean Jenna."
She pouts I lift my head up and look straight into her eyes and whisper "whatever."
I turn on my back and stare at the ceiling this new room isn't really suiting me. Looking into the mirror above my room is so weird and to add on to that my best friend is lying beside me staring into the mirror with me.
"Jenna, I'm sorry i'm so selfish." Tamara whispers and grabs my hand.
"Tamara it's Ok i'm sorry for acting like a douche-bag."
I can see her smile in the mirror and it makes me sigh to see how fast we make up every single time.
"Jenna?" "Yes Tam?" "I love you" I pause for a moment then quickly look at Tamara.
"What?" she whispers, slightly biting on her lip. I tighten my grip on her hand and her eyes get big.
"Tamara, I love you too, but stop talking about all those guys."
She nods, turning her body to face me completely I do the same, reflecting her own movements. We smile at each other, I lace my fingers between the empty spaces of hers. I think it's time to admit.
"So you really like Matty huh?" She asks breaking the completely perfect silence.
"Tamara don't talk about any guys I mean none at all. But I will answer your question and it's no, not I do not really like Matty."
She just arches her eyebrows in confusion and I just chuckle at it. Because she is just so cute no I mean um pretty or whatever I'm allowed to say she is pretty or cute because I am her best friend. But it makes me feel weird how comfortable I feel saying it, ironic huh?
"Tamara your really pretty" I say but it didn't mean to come out in words, it meant to stay in thoughts.
"Thank you Jenna so are you" she just replies, smiling she said it so easily and fast when I had to think about it.
And it made me feel so weird inside like when I kissed Matty it's weird to compare this to that but it does feel the same. Wait that means that she could just call me pretty to make me get that feeling. The feeling of love maybe no, well I don't know. I wonder what would happen if I kissed her would that be way better than kissing Matty. Well I did kiss her at the Dead Stacy play in front of everyone but that's different than kissing Matty in public no one took me and Tamara seriously.
But I do remember my heart beating so fast when she put her lips on mine. I wanted to grab her and deepen the kiss but instead I just kept the engraved on the ground.
"Tammy close your eyes for a second please?" I ask her and she gives me a confused cute look before closing her eyes.
I try to think of it as only an experiment but I know it's more than that in a way. I move closer to her and see her eyelids twitch she is trying not to open them. It's surprising and impressive how she is doing this she is usually the girl to live you know party. She is active she doesn't like just sitting or just laying in a room all day. I unwrap my fingers from her hand and put around her waist. I can feel her breathing faster the closer I scoot to her. She moves her and to rest on mine.
I smile I'm surprised she isn't asking why I am doing this or why am doing it. I move my hand to her face rubbing her side in the process.
"Jenna" she whispers once my lips are just centimeter away from hers. I rest my forehead on hers.
"Tammy" I whisper back before kissing her.
She quickly kisses me back, moving her hand to my face. Her thumb moves across back and forth on the skin of my cheek. This is way better than kissing Matty pubic or private it doesn't matter. Who knew best friends made the best kissers. Well know I do but I think Tamara is the only one. I won't try it with no one else Tamara because she is all I need to convince me that she is all I need.
