A/N: Here's some Jude and Max love for you all! Reviews are always appreciated. I hope this turns out okay, I didn't really have a plan, I just wanted to write a Max/Jude fic so here we go!

And as always, I do not own any of these characters, just the actions they are about to perform.

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It was cold, wet, and foggy out. The skies were a depressing shade of gray, and there was not another person in sight. Despite the drab atmosphere, Jude was upset for more important reasons. Things like the weather, his shitty job, or the fact that he didn't have a date for the upcoming weekend, seemed laughable now. He sat on the lonely beach in Liverpool, thinking about how the last year and a half changed his life so enormously.

I couldn't stand this place anymore, it was suffocating me. I was 21 years old, and I had spent what were supposed to be the best years of my life, working in the ship yards for shit pay. I had a girlfriend that I had honestly no idea why I put up with; she was needy, clingy, and only okay in bed. And I had a few pretty good friends from the yards, but nothing worth me sticking around for. I felt slightly bad for leaving me mom, but she had her friends and her sisters, so I wasn't too worried. All I knew was I had to get out.

I decided to go to America, for a couple of reasons. First, it seemed to be where it was at, where you could be free and do whatever you wanted; it was the center of the free world! I heard such stories about America; I knew I just had to see some of it for myself. And second, I wanted to find my father. I don't know the reason really, I mean I didn't expect to start up some bloody long lost father and son relationship, I guess I just needed to know where part of me came from.

I took a job shovelling coal into a furnace on a ship heading to America. I couldn't be bothered to take the time and get me visa, I guess I thought it wouldn't be worth it in the long run, and that I wouldn't be in America for that long. That decision would sure come back and bit me in the ass.

I jumped ship when I got shore in America, and made my way to Princeton. I looked up my father through some old army records, and got this Princeton address, I couldn't believe he worked in a place like that, I thought he must have been some sort of genius! Of course he turned out to be the janitor. But before I met my father, I met him. My best friend, my soul mate, my lover, and the reason for my heart ache. Of course I didn't realise all that in our first meeting though. I just helped him pick up his books, and he just pointed me in the direction of my father. Then I met my father, and it was a very anti-climatic point in my life. I mean I spent half me life trying to meet that man, and I got a hand shake and a "good luck kid". At least he gave me a place to stay.

That night I met him for the second time. He was running away from a couple of angry blokes, and I gave him a place to hide. We introduced ourselves to each other, and that night I found that something that was missing in my life, and that something was named Max. We instantly connected and became great friends. And the more time we spent together the more absolutely infatuated I became with him. I never even considered that I was queer before. I mean I was never really into Molly, or any bird for that matter, but I never found myself lusting after a bloke before. But the more time we spent together I knew there was no way I could feel this way about Max, and not at least be a little queer. I didn't matter to me though, I was too happy to be bothered by it. And thankfully it turned out he felt the same. One night we went out drinking with his dorm buddies, and then made our way back to his dorm room. It started as just some drunken banter, and then turned into some drunken wrestling, and then it turned into a full out snogging session. We became nearly inseparable after that.

Max left Princeton and went home to his family for Thanksgiving; taking me with him of course. They all seemed perfectly lovely, that is until WWIII broke out at the table. After that Max, his sister, and I went out for the evening. His sister's name was Lucy and she was a very beautiful girl, almost as beautiful as her brother himself. We all got along really well. Max and I tried to keep our relationship hidden, but I guess we didn't do a very good job because when we later came out and told her in New York she said she had kind of figured it out back at Thanksgiving.

Max and I moved up to New York the night after Thanksgiving, where we met the people who became our family. Sadie was our landlady and an incredible singer. It was just the three of us for a while, then she hired a guitarist named Jojo for her band, and he came to live with us as well. Later came Prudence, a super sweet girl, who turned out to have more in common with me and Max then she thought. And eventually came Max's sister Lucy, and with her arrival our little family was complete.

Unfortunately Lucy brought with her a letter, a letter that would change almost all our lives. Max was drafted into the Army. He tried a number of things to get out, but I guess if both your legs worked and you could hold a gun, you were Army material. I only got a couple more months with him, and then he was gone. I tried to concentrate on my art to keep me distracted from the war, but it was next to impossible, especially with Lucy and her trying to constantly shove her protest crap down my throat. I mean I knew she loved, and missed her brother. And I knew she was just trying to do her part in stopping the war and bringing him home, I guess I just didn't see the point. I would have done anything to bring Max home safe, I was just forced to face reality, and knew no matter how much I wanted it, or how much I tried, nothing would bring my love back safe.

I started drinking and getting high way too often, but no amount of liquor or dope took the pain away. I got in this depression where I didn't speak to anyone, and I didn't even leave my room unless I absolutely had to. One day, somehow, Lucy convinced me to come out with her to the laundry mat. And the minute she started in on me with her protest nonsense, I just lost it. We ended up getting in a huge yelling match right then and there. I told her all that crap her and that prick Paco were doing was completely pointless, and she shot back that I didn't really care about Max if I wasn't out there doing everything I could to bring him back. That really hurt, and I was left speechless. And of course I couldn't leave well enough alone, and I went to the stupid protest they were having that night, to give Lucy a piece of my mind, and ended up getting the shit kicked out of me and the arrested instead.

And of courses with no visa, and no way of proving that my father is an American citizen I was deported back to Liverpool. And that brings me to now, sitting on the beach, alone, after a full day's work at the ship yards, wondering how my life could have went from so perfect, to complete hell. And the worst part is I have no idea how Max is, I have no idea if he is even alive, it's killing me not knowing.

Jude lit another cigarette and just continued to stare out at the ocean. His thoughts about Max always brought tears to his eyes, and that's why he chose to sit out here on the cold miserable beach. He didn't want his mother to see him so weak and vulnerable so he tried to get everything out before he went home every day. He sighed, wiped his eyes, and started the long walk home.

It had been nearly a month since he got back to Liverpool, but he couldn't seem to fall back into his old routine no matter how hard he tried. His mother noticed his change in behaviour, and she was scarred for her son. He never went out, he hardly ate, he would barely talk to her; he would just work all day, and sleep all night. She tried to get him to open up to her, but he would just shut her out each time. Jude wanted to open up to his mother he really did, he was just scarred of what she would think. She was the only person Jude had in the world right now, and even though she was a very caring person he didn't want to risk her hating him for being in love with Max. And he figured until he knows what happened to Max, no need ruining her life by telling her she had a gay son, unless it was necessary.

He finally arrived back at his house after a long walk from the beach. His mother was sitting at the table with a very concerned look in her eyes. In front of her on the table was one of his sketch books. Shit she went through my things. Why the hell did she go through my things? I really hope that sketch book doesn't have any nude drawings in it.

"Honey, sit down. I really want to talk to you." Jude starred at his mother for a moment before he hesitantly sat down across from her. "I found this in your room." She held up the sketch book.

"Why the bloody hell were you going through my room!" He never yelled at his mother. It's not that he cared if she saw his work, he just felt betrayed that she would invaded his privacy like that.

"Please don't be made at me sweetie. I was just so worried; you have been so distant since you got back from America. You never talk to me...." She started crying now. Jude didn't realise he was hurting anyone but himself, by keeping to himself. He didn't even think that he was worrying his mother this way. He actually thought he was protecting her by keeping the truth hidden. "...I just thought maybe I could find something to give me an idea of what's bothering you, so maybe I could help! I'm sorry; I hope you're not angry with me." She was staring down at the table, playing with her handkerchief.

"Please don't cry mum. I didn't mean to yell. I'm the one that should be sorry." He had a feeling that the truth was about to come out, he only hoped his mother would still love him. She looked up and gave him a weak smile, then she opened up his sketch book and started to flip through it. There were a number of sketches of places he liked to go in New York, as well as a number of sketches of the people he loved back in New York.

"I didn't realise you were so talented Jude. When did you start drawing? And why did you never show me these?" She kept flipping through the book.

"I always liked art I suppose. I didn't start taking it seriously until I was in America though. I don't know I guess that place just brought it out in me. And I don't know why I didn't show you. Maybe I was slightly embarrassed, or something."

"You shouldn't be embarrassed love! These are really amazing. Who are these people? Were they your friends back in America?" His mother started flipping back to the pictures of his friends.

"Yeah, they were like my family over there mum. We all lived together. That is Sadie, and Jojo. She's a singer, and he plays guitar; they're in a band, they were just making a name for themselves when I left. And that is Prudence, and that is Lucy and that..." He took a deep breath and hesitated for a moment. "....And that is Max." He looked away from his mother. He didn't want her to see how upset he got, by just saying his name.

"Who is he? There are a lot of pictures of him." She could see that she was finally getting somewhere with her son. And she also didn't miss that look he got when he said his name. This was it; he was just going to have to tell her.

"His names Maxwell Carrigan. He was the first person that was really kind to me over there. He's such a great guy. We became really close, he's me best friend. Well, he's more than that really..." He looked down at the ground; he couldn't bear to look his mom in the eyes. He was crying now. "....I love him, I love him so much...I ...I'm so sorry." He stood up to run away, thinking his mom didn't want to look at her crying, queer son anymore, but he was stopped by her before he could get up stairs. She pulled him into a tight hug, led him over to the couch, and just held her son while he cried. She loved her son more than anything in the world, and just wanted him to be happy. And she didn't care for one second if what made her son happy was another man. But she knew there must be more to the story than this. After a couple more minutes his breathing calmed, and he stopped crying.

"It's okay love, you have nothing to be sorry about. I love you so much. What happened?" Jude lifted his head up, and looked at his mother. He was so relieved that she wasn't upset, although he figured she probably would be cool about it.

"He was drafted, and sent to Vietnam. And I have no idea of knowing if he's okay, or even if he's alive." This brought the tears back to his eyes, and his mother wrapped her arms back around her distraught son.

"It's okay. I'm sure he will be fine. You'll see him again, I'm sure. Don't cry love."She started rocking him back and forth; humming the song she used to sing to him when he was younger.

Hey Jude, don't make it bad, take a sad song, and make it better....

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Kay so I started this like two hours ago, having no idea what I was writing about and this is what I got. What do you think? Keep in mind it like 2:00 in the morning and I'm sick! Lol. So if it is really bad I'm blaming it on that, ahaha. And I left it open to become a muli-chapter story if you guys like it so, review and tell me what you think please and thank you. 