Notes: This takes place somewhere mid-series, but certainly after episode 13.
Leaning back in his seat at the corner table in Tiger Boy, Ian realized the rest of the team was gone, except for Souji. "What's up, Boy?" he asked, tucking his phone into his pocket. "The staring's getting on my nerves."
"I wasn't-never mind." Souji stood, looking upset.
Ian grabbed his wrist. "Hey, sorry sorry, sit and tell me."
Souji paused, then slowly sat, staring at the table.
Ian snagged a few chips off Souji's mostly empty plate, suspecting they might be there a while.
"How do you...how do you talk to girls?" Souji asked suddenly.
Ian blinked. He should have expected it and yet... "You'll have to be more specific. I see you speak to Rin and Amy and Youko all the time."
Souji flushed. "You know what I mean."
"Just to be clear: You're asking for advice on dating a lovely lady of your acquaintance."
Unbelievably, Souji managed to turn redder. "Yes."
"I see." Ian snagged a few more chips to buy himself some time. "And which lovely lady are we speaking of?"
Souji scowled. "Rin," he muttered.
Ian studied him for a few moments. "You do realize she's already in love with you, right?"
"Yes, I'm not a total idiot."
Ian looked up at the ceiling, remembering with fondness the sight of Rin chasing Souji around in circles, hollering. "Just a partial idiot, then?"
Head hanging, Souji nodded. "I know she likes me. I just...I get stupid when I think about her."
"Ah, young love." Ian grinned.
"If you're just going to laugh at me, then forget it. I'll go ask Amy for help."
"I didn't say I wouldn't help. I just need to be sure I understand the entire situation before I provide any advice."
Crossing his arms, Souji slumped back in his chair.
Ian considered Souji in his school uniform. He considered the boy's life. "You haven't spent much time with girls, have you?"
"No."
"Or that much time with kids your own age outside of school."
"No."
"Combine that with your natural reticence and I begin to see the problem." Ian tapped a finger on his chin. Indeed, it should have been obvious. The kid was even more emotionally constipated than he was, had been brought up by a single dad obsessed with swordplay, and had barely seen other kids on dates, let alone been on one himself.
Souji was still staring at the table like it would provide him answers. "I don't know..."
"You don't know how it goes. What to do, where to go, how to act."
"Yeah."
Ian sighed. "It depends."
"On what?"
"On what you're looking for."
Souji looked up at him, brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"
Ian leaned forward and looked him in the eyes. "Do you want someone to spend time with? Are you looking for a future spouse? Or do you just want to get laid?"
Souji's face turned an alarming shade of red. "Ah..."
"Hmm." Ian tilted his head and studied him. "So not the last one, then?"
"I..." Souji swallowed twice and found his voice. "I don't know. Am I supposed to have sex with her? Am I supposed to kiss her? I don't know!"
"There's no 'supposed to.' You decide what you want and then you ask her out. Then the two of you figure out if you want the same things." Ian crossed his legs and watched Souji think about it.
"I want..." Souji trailed off.
"You're a teenager, of course you do." Ian smirked at him. "As long as nobody is being pressured to do something they don't want, it should be okay. Look, sex is good, it's fun, and you should probably give it a good long think before you try it."
"Do you?"
"Do I what?"
"Do you have sex with all your girlfriends?"
Ian shifted in his seat, but realized he had to answer honestly. "Not all. Not even most."
"Oh."
"But if they want to, then yes." Ian grinned. "And I'm very very good at it."
Souji was still red, but Ian should have remembered he was also brave, and he soldiered on. "How do you know when to have sex? How do you know when you're in love?"
"I think you're asking the wrong person on the last question." Ian felt his jaw tighten and consciously relaxed it into his usual smile.
"Why? Just because you haven't found the woman you want to marry doesn't mean you don't know what you're looking for." Souji was so earnest and adorably young.
"There isn't anyone. Not for me." Ian wasn't sure why he'd even said it, except that he was distracted by the puppy dog eyes of his teammate.
"Why not?"
"I'm not...I'm just not that kind of guy."
Souji considered that. "You don't want love and marriage?"
"I didn't say that. But I'm not the kind who'll get it. I can make women happier this way and I'm happier this way." And if he said it often enough, he might even believe it.
"That's ridiculous." Souji crossed his arms.
"Look, Boy, we're supposed to be talking about you and Rin."
"Do you..." Souji frowned. "Do you think you're not lovable?"
"I think I liked you better when you were blushing too hard to say anything." Ian started to stand up, but Souji grabbed his wrist and tugged. They froze like that for long enough that people across the restaurant were staring at them, so Ian sat down, yanking his arm out of Souji's grip. "I don't need a pep talk, Boy."
"You do realize that calling me 'Boy' doesn't embarrass me enough to stop talking, right?"
Ian rolled his eyes. "Look, I don't need your advice on my love life."
"If you don't talk to me, I'll tell King."
Ian glared at him, but the goddamned kid gave him back the look that said he was the original immovable object. "Threatening to tell King? That's fighting dirty."
Souji crossed his arms and looked even more immovable.
Ian had a vivid image of being cornered and extensively questioned by King, who had a hell of a lot more life experience than Souji. "Fine. I don't see any reason why a woman would want to marry me. I like to date. I enjoy the company of women. I like to make them happy. That's my life. Satisfied?"
"Are you?"
Ian had to take a breath before he said "Yes."
Souji shook his head, frowning. "Ian. You...I don't know why you think so little of yourself. I always thought-"
"When you've managed to go out on a date with Rin, then maybe you can lecture me about love. Meanwhile, I have to meet Suzuki." Standing, Ian looked at Souji. "Don't tell King."
Souji sighed. "Okay. But...when all of this is over, when we've won, maybe you'll change your mind."
"Sure. Maybe I will."
Hands in his pockets, Ian left the restaurant, doing his best to put the conversation out of his mind and focus on his date for the evening.
Five years later, Souji stood in a Shinto shrine, holding Rin's hand and grinning madly as Ian kissed his new bride. Rin nudged Souji with her elbow. "What? What's so funny?"
"I was just remembering a conversation. It took him longer than I thought."
"Longer to what?"
"To figure out that he was loveable." Souji shrugged. "I guess some people take longer than others."
"He looks very happy."
"Yeah." Souji looked down at her. "Me too."
Beaming, she leaned against him. "Me too."
"How long does it take to plan one of these anyway?"
"A wedding?" Rin looked around then looked at him. "I'm not sure. I-" She stopped and stared. "Were you just asking me to marry you?"
"Uh...yes?"
Her breath caught in a way that he recognized meant he was in trouble. "You just half-heartedly asked me to marry you at your best friend's wedding. Souji, you're an idiot!" Her voice started to rise.
People were looking at them and Souji winced. "I'm sorry."
She covered her eyes. "It's a good thing I love you."
"Was that a yes?"
"Aaaaaah!" Rin screamed.
"Oh myyy," Ian said, arm around his bride. "What have we here?"
"Um." Souji looked around and saw his teammates converging. "I think we're getting married."
Ian looked at Souji and started to laugh.
"It's not funny!"
"Yeah, it really is."
Rin took her hands away from her face and launched at Souji, who caught her against him. "Yes, you idiot. Yes, I'll marry you."
And then Daigo was clapping his back, while Amy dragged Ian's wife aside to talk to her, and Ian laughed and Ucchi looked confused, and Nobu and Youko hugged each other.
Souji just held Rin tight and decided that everything would be okay.
-end-
