Disclaimer: I own nothing.
A/N: This is my first fan fiction… don't run away, though! Hope you enjoy it, and a note to people who are craving to flame, it's meant to be OOC, which means everyone will be out of character. I'm pretty fed up with receiving flames repeating, what I have already admitted. I apologize, in advance for the grammatical errors in this story… I have misplaced my Microsoft Word, installation CD, during this entire time and there were more misspelled words then I thought. So, at this very moment I am re-writing this piece of garbage. I really hate it when I make spelling mistakes.
"High School Of Weirdos"
By:LimeQuartz
In someone's house:
Dun dun dun dun, ring ring!
Dun dun dun dun, beep beep!
Wakeeeeee uppppp!
BATMAN COMMANDS YA TO WAKE UP...TODAY...IMMEDIATELY!
YO!
ring! ring! MU HA HA HA HA HA!
beep! beep! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!
YO!
ring! ring! ring!
beep! beep!
ring!
ring?
rin-'
''Wake up! Didn't you hear you're alarm clock? Batman commands you to wake up... today, immediately!''
''BATMAN COMMANDS YA TO WAKE UP...TODAY...IMMEDIATELY! YO!'' repeated the alarm clock, loudly.
''Hey? Are you listening to me? Wake up!''
The young girl who was being scolded by her inner self placed the pillow over her head, in a futile attempt to block out the voice. "Perhaps, when Santa Claus is real..." muttered the pink-haired girl in her slumber, in a tone barely above a whisper.
''When's that?'' her Inner self asked, perplexed.
''Never...'' the girl muttered, under her breath, before shifting in her bed, uncomfortably.
Crickets, which were hidden in some unknown place, began chirping.
"Listen to yourself once in a while! Wake up!'' her conscience demanded, frustrated at her uncooperative self.
"Who are you, Mom?" the girl, groaned, in her sleep.
''Do I look like Mom? Well, you can't see me… and you don't get sarcasm… Let me elaborate slowly, for you. First of all your parents are on a business trip, Second, off all, since you're too dense to figure out who I am and I know you're going to say yes to my question, I'll tell you. I am the inner you...or your conscience… you get it?''
Sakura's eyebrows knitted together at her conscience's rather loud tone. Instead or retaliating out-loud, due to her exhaustion, she thought inwardly, "Coolies! (1) I have an inner self? Just like Pinocchio… Hey wait a minute… If you're me then that means you're also insulting yourself... oooouuuuuuu (2) burnnnnnnnn (3) Now, please go away, Mr.Stalker…""
-Silence-
''Yeah...well, I recommend you waking up know or you're going to be late for your first day of school...again. And I'm not a stalker, and you just insulted yourself, BURN."
"I'm going to be late for the first day of school...again?" the girl slurred, dumbly, her eyes still closed. The hand on her nearby clock twitched at met the numeral four. Sakura's eyes automatically opened and she fell off the bed, literally.
''What? I'm going to be late for the first day of hell?'' With that said, correction, with that screamed, the bewildered girl a.k.a Haruno Sakura quickly jumped out of her bed, brushed her teeth, took a quick shower, changed into a pair of jeans and a red top, brushed her hair carelessly, grabbed her backpack and rushed quickly out the door like a lunatic.
"I can't wait to see everyone again… Tch, that's a lie… I can wait. After-all, we've been hanging out together for practically, the whole summer..." she thought, as she ran towards Konoha High.
The street where many car accidents occur:
When Sakura turned the next corner of the block she abruptly, came face-to face with a street that caused many car accidents. She glanced, wearily; at the stop light to reassure herself if it was safe to cross, because she was well known for being clumsy sometimes... alright, make that all the time.
"Good it's safe" she finally confirmed.
-Or so she thought-
She was about to cross the street, when a incredibly shiny, red sports car drove past her, and in the process, almost crashed into her.
-That would have hurt… a lot!-
Sakura froze in her spot, as if her shoes were glues to the concrete sidewalk. She blinked when the automobile backed up so that it was before her. She resisted the urge to punch the window and give whoever was hidden behind it a 'valuable' lesson on pain. Overall, the vehicle looked really expensive and new but then again so was the new fork she bought from Naruto, who claimed it, was a 'special' antique.
"Watch where you're going jerk-o or, you'll land yourself in prison. Can't you tell the difference between red, yellow and green? You want me to switch that green light bulb into a purple one, so I'll make it easier for you to take in?" she screamed, shaking an angry fist at the very, very, shiny car.
''Jerk-o?'' her inner self repeated, confused at the strange word.
The black, dark, non-transparent window slid down revealing a man about her age. He was very good cross that out, very, very, good looking. He had dark onyx eyes and his hair color was oddly enough, similar to his cold eyes. Sakura was too furious to notice how 'hot' the man was until her inner self kicked in...
''He's really hot! I bet he can make any girl drool!"
"Who cares about that, he almost ran over us, and for your information I'm a girl and I'm not drooling! Plus, you have horrible taste in men." thought Sakura, aggravated.
''You're a girl? And when have my tastes ever been wrong?"
"You know you're insulting yourself, right? And remember the incident where you thought that person selling the popcorn was 'hot' and in the end it was actually, a girl? You remember that little mishap, inner me?" Sakura mused, to herself.
''Good times, good times."
Sakura was going to retaliate, to her 'conscience'. How could Pinocchio stand having a conscience? What was his name? Chimeny? Jimeny, maybe? She didn't get a chance to think again when a deep, annoyed, voice abruptly, broke her out of her thoughts.
"I'm sorry miss, but would you like a ride to school? Just you and me… don't worry, I won't bite." he sneered at the fuming girl.
"She's going to say yes, any minute now," thought Sasuke, as he sighed inwardly. "I never seen her around before, though... guess that's a good fact." he thought, positively.
"What a jerk!" Sakura hissed, under her breath, as she tightened her grip on her school bag in anger.
''I thought it was jerk-o, now its jerk?'' her inner self demanded.
"Who in the right mind, does he think he is? Mr.Oh-I-almost-killed-someone-I'll give-them-a-ride-and-its-okay?" Sakura pondered in frustration, interrupting herself.
''No, he thinks he's Batman, obviously! Look at the car. It has 'I'm ready to save the day using my kick-ass skills' written all over it!" her inner self retaliated.
"Hey! I like Batman, for your information! Batman has manners! 'F'-ing (4) manners!" she thought, angrily.
''Well, he sure needs to change his wardrobe... let's take him shopping, sometime…"
Sakura snapped back into reality when, Sasuke, reached out of his window, and began waving a hand in front of her face, which held a distant expression
''Yeah sure... I'd love to take you on that offer..." she replied sweetly, with a hint of bitterness, and sarcasm, well hidden in her tone.
"Che, women are so predictable." he thought victoriously, as his trademark smirk slowly, made its way to his lips.
"In your dreams pal!" she screamed, walking around the vehicle as she continued her way to school. She had this weird feeling she had seen him before, but shrugged it off when she realized he wasted her time, to meet Naruto and others.
"Interesting girl, she didn't fall for me like those ugly, horrific hair pulling fan girls...where did that come from? It also seems she doesn't, know who I am yet. Oh well, we will meet again"
-Dun dun dun dun!-
He watched as her slim figure disappeared but as she was running a book fell out her bag. Sasuke kicked open the door and bent down to snatch the book. He looked up, she was gone.
''I guess I'll have to return it to her'' he thought, as he sighed once more. His gaze fell from the school subject, to her name.
''Haruno Sakura, eh?'' he whispered, while smirking his trademark smirk... which is a smirk... which he is smirking… 'smirkingly'… which is not a word…
-Silence, followed by author apologizing to readers for random-ness.-
Someone coughed from a distant. "We'll meet again…" said Sasuke, evilly after being interrupted.
-Dun dun dun dun!-
Some random place:
"O-M-G! What are you doing?" asked Ino, in horror. She had just arrived here from her recent chat with Shikamaru and right before her was an odd and weird scene. Tenten had a dark shade of pink lipstick in her hand. She held it in a 'stabbing position' as she drew on an unconscious man's face.
"Wwhhaaaaaaa! You killed Neji! And now, you're drawing on his face in a futile attempt to get his forgiveness!" Ino, accused, taking a step back.
Tenten turned to face her aquatint and sent a strange look in the frightened girl's direction. "You've been watching way too many horror movies. They only corrupt your mind, Neji's just asleep." said Tenten, as she resumed drawing on Neji's face, as if it were paper.
Ino took a deep breath. Part of her was relieved, while the other wanted to smack her silly, for thinking so dumbly. "What are you doing Tenten?" Ino asked.
The brunette didn't answer for a while. "What does it look like I'm doing?" asked Tenten, evilly, after a few minutes.
"Drawing on Neji's face?" Ino offered.
Tenten grinned. "Then that's what I'm doing!'' she answered, as she drew a thick pink mustache on Neji, who was sleeping.
"Tenten, I don't think this is a good idea'' said Ino taking a cautious step back, once more.
"Why not?" asked Tenten. She advanced on, and drew some thick circular circles around Neji's eyes. Tenten then drew a lightning bolt on Neji's forehead. TA DA! Glasses and a lightning bolt... Neji was officially Harry Potter's twin! The only problem was the mustache and clown-like designs but whatever!
"Today's picture day..." Ino said, her voice filled with, what seemed like, fear.
"Naruto told me it was on the 28th of 'F.L.A.R.G!'" Tenten said.
Ino sweat dropped anime style.
"Tenten there is no month called 'F.L.A.R.G..."
Tenten mouthed a silent ''O'' and threw the 'evidence' which was also known as 'the tube pink lipstick' to some unknown place and stood up.
"Ha ha... let's pretend this never happened." said Tenten lamely.
"What happened?'' asked Ino innocently. Both Ino and Tenten began whistling. They began walking away innocently, from Neji, who looked like a clown with pink glasses, a lightning bolt and a pink mustache...
The pass-bys, took as many photos as their memory card could hold. Too bad Neji didn't know that.
Konoha High:
When Sakura finally arrived at the gigantic, crowded, high school, she smiled. It looked the same as it always did except there were more people than before. She stopped at the entrance and she glanced at her navy-coated watch, she had 7 minutes to chat with her friends although, she would've had more time if that arrogant 'jerk-o' didn't try to murder her...
"A very cute jerk-o!" her inner self added.
"No, I don't want to talk to you now!" she thought.
''Fine, man, one word: mood swings! I'm the reason why you weren't late for school, fine then I'm outta here!'' her inner self muttered. Sakura's bright, forest green, eyes scanned the crowds searching for her friends. She finally spotted something orange, more specifically Naruto's sweater.
"Hey! Naruto!" she yelled, waving at him. Naruto's sky-blue eyes locked with hers, it took him a few minutes to recognize it was her.
"Sakura!" he said, before pulling her into a big friendly hug. "I haven't seen you for years, I missed youuuuu!" Sakura sweat dropped at his weird statement.
"Um... Naruto you came over yesterday..." she said, hoping he could comprehend her meaning of 'yesterday'.
"Oh yeah... and then I ate all of the ramen in your small not-as-big-as-my-house, house! MU HA HA HA HA! Cough! Cough!" he exclaimed.
Sakura sweat dropped again, when she started to hear Naruto mutter things to himself like, "I almost got the evil laugh right, err the ramen cursed me with a cold, and why did you betray me ramen?" Naruto started to cry with rivers flowing down his face, anime style.
"Yeah... Naruto," said Sakura. ''I didn't have any ramen so you ate all of my Halloween candy, and started threatening it. You then started saying things like how it isn't as good as ramen but it'll have to do... THEN, you ran to Shikamaru's house, and ate all of his ramen when he was sleeping."
"I remember now!" Naruto said, as he remembered how fun yelling at every piece of candy was, before eating it. He then started thinking about how fun it was sneaking into Shikamaru's house, and then raiding him of all of his ramen when he was asleep. Naruto then attempted to laugh like a maniac once more he also, started coughing again.
At that exact moment Shikamaru, appeared beside Sakura. "Hey..." he started, but he was interrupted by a girly, window-breaking, scream.
"O-M-G, SHIKAMARU IS A WIZARD!" screamed Naruto, so loudly it broke a nearby window.
"Actually I..."
Naruto squealed like a girl, who had lost her favourite doll, and fainted before Shikamaru could finish his sentence.
Sakura gave Shikamaru a quizzical look, when he screamed, dramatically, "No one ever wants to hear what I have to say!"
"Umm… I want to hear what you were going to say, Shikamaru." She said.
Shikamaru grinned.
"I got a restraining order, yesterday!"
He began to do the ridiculous dance of victory, and ended up tripping himself, and falling on a nearby student who was chewing gum.
Sakura nodded, and said, "Me too! It was for my neighbour! She kept staring at me… it was weird."
Shikamaru gave her a weird look. "I got one for my doctor."
"Why'd you get one for your doctor…?" Sakura asked.
"Because he was stalking me… he called me… HE CALLED ME!"
"Aren't doctors supposed to do that? Like, aren't they supposed to call you and tell you when your appointment is?"
Shikamaru thought about it, and then nodded slowly. "Hey, you're right… ohh well! He still called me, what a stalker!"
Both Sakura and Shikamaru's attention then turned to Naruto. They sweat dropped anime style. This was definitely going to be a long day...
A/N: Hope you liked it! Please leave a review! xD
Coolies (1) – I absolutely despise this word
oooouuuuuuu (2) – pronounced as 'you' without the 'y'
burnnnnnnnn (3) – I don't often use this word because I find it rather annoying… it makes me smile though. Good times, good times.
'F'-ing (4) – Even if I can swear in reality and in this 'T' rated fanfiction. I'm not going to, well at least not a lot. I'll try to avoid using immature insults such as this as much as I can because frankly, it just ruins the story in my opinion.
Next time in High School Of Weirdos:
"Okay class I believe it's time to introduce ourselves and by the way I'm Kakashi Hatake. You with the blond hair and funny face, you can go first."
"Hey! Who do you think you are, calling me funny face? You funny face! Well anyways I'm Naruto Uzumaki the smartest person ever! I like ramen, more ramen, threatening candy, and listening to music... BELIEVE IT!'' Naruto then tried doing the evil laugh again and yes, he started coughing again.
Kakashi and every one sweat dropped.
"Ohh I believe it alright, you little freak.'' thought Kakashi inwardly. "Okay then, what kinds of music do you like?" asked Kakashi.
He soon regret asking it when Naruto jumped on a near by desk, and shouted, "Arthur!" Naruto then started to sing, "Having fun isn't hard when you got a library card! Having fun isn't hard when you got a library card!"
