Hello all! I'd like to start this Author's note off by saying I am ESTATIC about this story. I just sat down with my notebook and started writing and holy hell, the angst just flowed right out of me. At first I wasn't quite sure where it was going but I have a vague outline in my head for it as of right now. I have no idea where exactly this story will go and I miss that feeling (I hate outlines. It's much more fun to just write and see what happens!) and therefore have welcomed it with open arms. I know that this chapter is fairly vague but I promise it'll pick up in the next chapter. I hope y'all enjoy!
Her life sucked, it really did.
She worked all day at a small diner where she made minimum wage and was constantly hit on by the dirty truckers that stopped in. She would then take the bus back into town to her too small rundown apartment where Noah would be waiting with Caroline.
He would leave for his night shift while she bathed their daughter and put her into bed. The rest of Quinn's nights were spent looking over bills, writing checks that wouldn't clear, and then going to bed alone, sweating buckets in the July heat.
--
She doesn't enjoy anything very much anymore. She has no time for herself and when she does its spent catching up on sleep.
She no longer sings or exercises or takes classes down at the community college nor does she believe in God. She just works and sleeps and tries not to think about how much better her life would have been had she not decided to keep her daughter.
This thought makes her feel guilty.
She loves her daughter more than anything else in this word. She loves hearing her talk about school and loves watching her face light up every time Quinn manages to save enough money to buy the girl a new Barbie.
Sometimes though, when Caroline pouts and cries and yells because she can't get new toys or clothes and says the she hates her, Quinn wishes she'd given her away.
At least they'd both have more than this.
--
She and Noah Puckerman are not together.
They live together out of necessity and because it's better for their daughter.
They fuck each other because sometimes, it makes living this shitty mundane life worth it.
But no, they're most definitely not together.
--
The diner is on the very outskirts of Lima. The only people who stop there are traveling out of town or just stopping to refuel.
Most days, its fat truckers with balding heads and sweat stained shirts, beards becoming littered with the bits of food she serves them.
Whenever she walks past on occupied booth, a greasy hand grabs her ass through her blue uniform.
When she first got this job she would turn on her heel and yell at the customer.
Now she just throws a fake smile over her shoulder and hopes for a decent tip.
--
She shouldn't be in a place like this is what everyone who still cares tells her.
She's too pretty, too smart, too good for this shit hole.
She just shrugs because this is what helps keep a roof over her daughter's head.
--
Noah collapses next to her on their full sized bed. She opens her eyes, squinting as the tinted morning light streams in through the window. "What day is it," she asks because now they always blend together.
"Saturday," he grumbles, his eyelids heavy and drooping shut.
It's his day off and her extra full day.
She cups the back of his neck and brings herself closer to him. She kisses his eyes, nose, cheeks, and then his lips. "I'm tired," he mutters and she drops her hand from his neck, moving it further south. She dips her hand beneath his boxers, taking him in her hand as she leaves a trail of opened mouth kisses from his lips to his ear.
"Please," she begs because yesterday was one of the days where she almost rode the bus out of town.
He's tired as hell but he pushes her onto her back anyway, his rough calloused hands spreading her thighs.
--
His life is really shitty.
He spends most of his mornings getting his daughter ready for school and then drops her off. While she's at school he does everything he always thought women should do. He cleans and does the laundry and buys groceries. If it's summer, which it is currently, he cleans pools for people in town while Caroline is off at a free youth camp at the park on 5th.
Cougars like him less because he's older and tired looking now; rundown, just like their husbands.
Some of them find his tattered self appealing and he fucks them because Caroline needs a new bathing suit.
--
He doesn't do much of anything for himself anymore. He doesn't play the guitar or try to find someone he actually plans on spending the rest of his life with. He just works night shifts and does shit around the house since Quinn gets more hours than he does. He sleeps when Caroline's at school and cooks dinner for her when she's done with her homework.
On his day off he really wants to sleep in as late as he can and then wake up and try to find some sports game to watch on their basic cable. But Quinn's day off is almost never his day off, so instead he's always up with Caroline. They watch Saturday morning cartoons and they go to the park even though he's still dog ass tired.
Life woulda been better if he'd just let Quinn give their daughter away.
--
Him and Quinn, they're not together.
They live together because he wanted them to be a family and his mom wasn't going to let them live with her forever.
They moved into the apartment on Caroline's first birthday and Quinn spent the night crying because after a year, they'd done nothing.
They weren't anywhere near out of this fucking town, if anything, they were now officially stuck in it.
They share a bed because it was cheaper than buying two twins and shoving them into the small room.
They fuck each other because their lives suck enough, there's no point in going celibate too.
But no, they don't belong to one another or some shit like that.
--
He works down at a shady wood factory. Its right by a freeway overpass and they only work at night. He's been told that if he sees anyone who looks like a cop to tell the manager right away.
One time, he found five pot plants in the shed that had the extra tools.
He was told to ignore the plants and slipped $500 to forget he saw them.
He bought Caroline new clothes (and this one doll she had been begging for) and gave Quinn $100 to spend on herself.
She ended up getting her hair and nails done before showing him the red lace bra she'd bought to thank him.
Afterwards, Quinn felt guilty about spending the money when it could have gone towards their ever growing debt.
"We gotta be selfish sometimes," he told her and she rolled her eyes.
"Look where that got us last time," she whispered, eyes darting to their daughter who was animatedly watching TV.
--
He looks at his daughter who has his brown hair and Quinn's hazel eyes. She screams that she hates him sometimes when she gets mad.
He has to force himself to not scream back that he hates her too.
--
He really doesn't hate his girls. He just hates what they've all become.
Fucking Lima Losers.
He already knows Caroline won't get out of here. If Quinn couldn't then what hope did anyone else have?
--
She kinda loves her life.
She's not quite on Broadway yet but she's on stages and singing and acting and God, this is almost everything she's ever wanted.
It bugs her that despite being so close, she feels so shitty.
She lives alone in a city filled with millions of people.
Her apartment has an amazing view but she'd never know it considering she works her ass off to pay the rent on the place and all her extra time is spent on stage.
She sleeps alone every single night because, really, when the hell was she going to find time to meet someone, let alone establish a relationship.
Like she said before, she kinda loves her life.
She just wishes she weren't so lonely.
--
She heads back to Lima because she needs to visit her dads and she was just rejected from the third Broadway play she's auditioned for.
She's driving from the airport and once she sees the city limits sign her stomach growls loudly.
She decides to pull into the seedy truck stop diner for a quick piece of something to tide her over until she gets to her dads'.
She tries not to wrinkle her nose visibly at the horrid smell she's met with when she walks into the diner.
She tries not to recoil when she realizes that the cracked vinyl seat she sits on at the bar is sticky.
She tries not to spit out the sip of water she just consumed when Quinn Fabray asks her what she'd like.
