Disclaimer: I do not own Toki Wartooth, Pickles the Drummer, Nathan Explosion, Skwisgaar Skwigelf, or William Murderface. They belong to Metalocalypse and thus Brendon Small. I never claimed to own them so please don't sue me. The events in the below story are never part of the show.

Warning: M/M slash. Toki/Nathan. Gets very slashy in some places. Also, drug and alcohol references and profanity. Rated M.

As Nathan Explosion felt himself begin to doze off blissfully, the sound of Skwisgaar Skwigelf's infamous incorrect grammar and somewhat nasally voice woke him again. Although the couch was comfortable enough, he found himself walking aimlessly amongst the darkened corridors of Mordhaus which held their own strange voices; and that was on top of Skwisgaar's already loud one. From what Nathan could decipher, Skwisgaar was yelling at Toki about guitars or solos, although he couldn't be sure because they continued to drift in and out of their native languages.

"You ams dildo-lickers!" Skwisgaar accused. "Can'ts ams not steals my solos!"

"Nots stealings it," Nathan heard Toki reply in a whimper. "Pracsticings it, ja?"

"Whys you gots to be ams pracsticings things you ams nots…is nots playings?" he asked smugly.

"I don'ts…" Toki faltered for a moment before finishing his phrase. "I don'ts knows. Please be leavings now!"

"Happily," Skwisgaar snapped before charging out of the room and right into Nathan. "Kicks that damns kids outs the bands, Na'tans."

Nathan shook his head and watched the jealous lead guitarist storm down the hall that Nathan had just come from. He waited uncomfortably outside of Toki's bedroom door for a few minutes, simply listening to the angry sobs of what he felt to be his little brother. After a few minutes, Toki's choked sobs turned into the music of angels:

"Cries alones, I've gones away…no more nights, no more pains. I've gones alones, tooks all my strengths…I've mades the change…I won't sees you tonights…"

Nathan paused and listened to the tortured lyrics ringing out clearly throughout his ears. How lonely, how pained Toki's words sounded! To the singer's cold heart, those words were so sad that they approached brutality. Nathan raised his fist to knock at the door, but Toki immediately started into another bout of angst-filled lyrics.

"Sorrow sanks deeps insides my bloods…all the ones around me, I cared for and most of alls I loved! But I can't sees myself that ways…please don't forgets me or cries while I'm aways!"

"Toki," Nathan interrupted, barging into the boyish room. When he saw what Toki was doing, he sheepishly back away. The little Norwegian was curled in the fetal position spilling tears into the fabric of his tiny teddy bear…in nothing but a tight fitting Explode Me shirt typically worn by Nathan's fangirls and his underwear. "Uh, what are you doing?"

Toki curled himself over and faced the lead singer confidently, not at all ashamed by his attire. "Oh, hi Na'tans."

"What are you doing?" he repeated cautiously.

"Thinkings…singings. Nothings really."

"Those were some…brutal lyrics you just, uh, sang."

"Nots mine," Toki admitted with a shrug, sitting up and looking Nathan right in the eye. "I steals them, I guess. Nots the first times I…steals things…"

"Don't tell me you're talking about the damn guitar solo with Skwisgaar." When Toki didn't answer, Nathan knew that was a yes. He went over and sat next to his little brother and smiled gently at him. He leaned back against the surprisingly small bed.

"I don'ts thinks I'll bes pracsticings no mores." He sniffed sadly.

"Hey, Toki," Nathan said, attempting to change the subject. "Why don't you sing me a few more of those metal lyrics."

"Okays…anythings for you." Toki looked up at him admiringly. "It's buildings up insides of me, a place so dark, so colds, I had to sets me free. Don't mourns for me, you're nots the ones to place the blames…as bottles call my names, I won't sees you tonights…" Nathan felt himself swaying to the high tenor of Toki's ringing vocals. If it weren't for his grammar, he found himself thinking, he'd make a great back-up singer…

No. That would be ridiculous. It was the whole thing of his language skills. A responsible frontman couldn't let his feelings rule him. Toki could be a back-up singer no more than he could be the lead guitarist. Certain things prevented that from happening. Besides, Pickles had a nice alto voice for background lyrics anyway.

Something Toki had that Pickles never would, though, was his appeal. He was so childish, so innocent and so…not brutal. There wasn't a brutal bone in his body. If there was, Nathan sure hadn't seen it yet. It was threatening to their success, but as vital as Murderface's depressing cynicism and self-loathing. Without that crucial aspect, Nathan knew he couldn't lead the band.

"What's you thinkings, Na'tans?" Toki asked, his pale blue eyes piercing like icicles into the singer's psyche. No, not like icicles. Like icy spears that Eskimos would use to defend their territory.

"This whole Duncan Hills thing is stressing me out," Nathan lied with a groan, massaging his temples gently. "I don't have a clue how to pull this, uh, campaign off. It's coffee. Not too metal."

"Well, unless you pours it ons someones," Toki suggested, his icy eyes shining with glee as the thought of scalding skin filled his mind. Maybe there was a brutal side to that kid.

"That's brutal," Nathan agreed, allowing the images of skin melting off of the fans' faces fill his head. "Yeah…yeah…we should do that." He didn't even notice Toki stare at a large patch of scar tissue on his upper leg. Instead, he was thinking about how they could get a vat of coffee, and how they could pour it over the concert to maim so many fans.

Toki started to stand and pulled his shirt off gingerly. "Wait, wait," Nathan argued, pulling him back to the floor. The guitarist dropped his arms and the shirt fell back over his torso. "Gotta ask…where'd you get that shirt?"

"Um," Toki bit his lip. "Well, I founds it ons the floors in your rooms. Ands I kinds of –"

"What? Why were you in my room?" Nathan snarled, standing angrily. Toki peered up at him sheepishly from under his light-colored eyelashes.

"I thoughts I heards you calls me ins there…"

"From my bedroom?"

"Ja, well, Skwisgaar call me from ins there lots." Toki's jaw dropped. "Nots likes that! He makes me go gets his cigarettes and stuffs."

"You know what? I don't care. I have an album to make." And with that, Nathan left, still somewhat peeved about the whole shirt thing

[]

Toki picked a fuzz from his beloved shirt. It still smelled like Nathan from when he'd leaned on him earlier. It smelled his alcohol and soap, eau de Nathan. Why hadn't he brought himself to plead with the words that had plagued his heart for so long? He had perfect opportunity to spit out those simple words "I love you," yet somehow he'd chickened out again. At this rate, the band will be broken up before he could bring himself to say it.

Yet, it hadn't felt like the perfect time. He wanted to tell him when he wasn't so embarrassed, when his shirt wasn't bathed in sweat and tears. It would take a lot to penetrate Nathan's unbreakable barrier, but Toki was determined to break down those walls and find the sensitive soul beneath. He knew he could do it, but he still wasn't sure when.

Toki removed his shirt gingerly, not wanting to stretch it out or rip it. That shirt was the little remnant of Nathan's fandom. If he got rid of that, he'd have nothing to remind him of his beloved crush except Nathan himself. And what good was that when he couldn't even bring himself to admit the most dire feeling in his heart?

A/N

The song mentioned is indeed I Won't See You Tonight Pt. 1 by one of my favorite bands, Avenged Sevenfold. I figured it was worth mentioning so I don't get nailed for not giving credit. I clearly didn't write those beautiful tragic words, so let's give that to the band. Anyway, this is the new story. Hope you enjoy it as much as I am :D