Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!
I know I already had a previous fic started, but I have been thinking a lot lately to re-vamp it. This fic is just something I whipped up because there are some fics out there who make Yugi seem younger than he is, and his height might give that impression, but sometimes people do forget that he is teenager. And teenagers sometimes have lots of angst on their hands. So this is just my take on it and possibly a happy ending…
Home Is Where the Heart Is
I'm on my bed in my room in my soft light blue pajamas with the covers over me. Just lying here with a lamp with dim lighting, and I'm staring up at the ceiling. There's a thunderstorm going on outside that's keeping me awake tonight with this damn memory of mine. Yes… a damn memory… it just had to be this one. It's been a few months after-
The Ceremonial Battle…
I know it was me that told him to go to the afterlife, but did anyone ask what he wanted? Did he even know what he wanted? I know I didn't force him too, but..
Yami… no… Pharaoh Atemu has chosen to rest his soul and go into the afterlife…
I saw him leave not once turning to look at us…
Not once turning around to look at me just one last time… just giving me that thumbs up and the doors closed behind him.
Why couldn't I have just told him how I felt? I knew he was leaving and it was the best time to tell him how I really feel even if he didn't respond to my feelings… I just wanted him to know, but I was so frightened that he would reject me. To leave this world with the last of his thoughts of disgust, pity or pain. I didn't want to do that to him. Bad enough I left him with tears and a fake smile saying to him "I'll never forget you".
Yeah… it was a fake smile. Though I am happy for him that he's resting his soul now, back with his family and friends of his past, but I wanted him to stay.
To stay with me… Is that so wrong? Am I selfish for wanting him to choose me instead of going home? Didn't he feel at home with me and Grandpa? I was silently pleading to God, Ra, Buddha, any higher power up in the heavens to hear my prayer to make Yami stay… But no one heard me… I didn't even block my thoughts from Yami, but I guess our bond was severed when the Ceremonial Battle was taking place. I wish he chose me… I wish he loved me…
I wish he stayed with me.
I feel so empty now without him.
Am I really the light?
Because hikaris, unlike me, think of everyone else don't they? I'm not that innocent as I look. I want things for me as well damn it! I've gone through Hell and high waters to get to where I am and couldn't just one thing go my way! Just one thing! I've put others in front of myself and sacrificed myself, but it just wasn't enough to get what I want isn't it? ISN'T IT!
And all because I didn't say three little words to him.
"Hey Yami. Guess what? I love you." I say aloud but soft enough so that it couldn't be heard.
Would it have made a difference if I just said those words? If he responded to my feelings, it would have been a greater chance of him staying? But I doubt it. He was a soul, a spirit wanting to rest in piece and who am I to stop him for wanting that decision? Damn, sometimes I just want to punch the wall or break something to release my anger.
As I reach up to wipe what I thought was sweat, really wasn't. "A tear?" Am I crying? Shit, I really am! I'm not supposed to! I'm so angry at him! I want almost nothing to do with him now! That last thought was such a fucking lie! God Damn it all! Why did he leave me? Why? Why? Why! WHY?
I sit up straight just in time when thunder struck and I start crying. I start to calm down after what seemed like hours but really was only five minutes. I get off my bed and head straight for the window. I stare out into the rainy night with the winds blowing hard and lightning flashing with a gap of a few seconds. I have to think rationally and logically. Yami was my very best friend of all time. He was a spirit who wanted to get his memories and had the option to go home and therefore he chose home. Anyone would've chosen to go home, to go back to what they knew and loved. But I wonder if he ever thought about me? His charge, his hikari, his aibou, his friend… did he even consider to still keep sharing the same body? I bet Isis was keeping something from us from giving Yami his own physical body. That lady still has more up her sleeve but chooses not to show it… I sigh.
Did Yami really care about me as much as he said? Did he? I know Anzu had the biggest freakin' crush on him ever, and probably had a better chance since Yami's straight and all, but did he ever think about me the way I think about him for even a brief second? Nah… He's a jackass that's never coming back! That jackass! He's a jackass for not…considering… me…
So what if I'm selfish! I'm human too! NO ONE is ever completely pure and innocent! Not even me and I hate it very much when people put me on that false pedestal! Sometimes I'm not dependable! Sometimes I don't always think of others! Sometimes I want things to go my way! I start crying again and starting inching my head to the glass of the window. I'm rocking back in forth in frustration.
BAM! CRACK!
"SON OF A BITCH!" Fuck. I hit the glass with my forehead and its starting to bleed… just fucking great. I'm starting at the beginning and went into my crying stage yet again, but this time I have had! I quickly go to the bathroom and slap on some sticky bandage thing on the big red spot on my forehead, got dressed in my black top with black leather pants, quickly put on some arm bands and my collar and rushed out of my room. Luckily Grandpa is out on an excavation convention with his friend Arthur for a few days so I'm home free for this whole crap. I run down the stairs, through the Kami game shop door and lock it before I left the building running blindly through the storm.
Thoughts all jumbled up in my brain. He left you. He left you. He didn't see you cry. He doesn't love you. He's never coming back.
The last thought struck a nerve. My own nerve… go figure. Where I stopped was at the park. Funny isn't it? I remember having all kinds of memories here of just me and Yami just talking about Duel Monsters, feelings of not remembering who you are, where we would like to travel, what Yami wants to try. Sure it was just us talking through our thoughts and me having ice cream by myself as he watched me eat it, but I was so happy with that. And I could tell that he was happy as well.
But I guess he wasn't truly happy since he left me.
Here.
How can I be light without the darkness?
How can darkness be without the light?
THEY HAVE TO CO-EXIST!
Don't they?
But yet, he left me. I guess we're not Yami and Hikari.
Just two normal people named Atemu and Yugi. Nothing more. Nothing less. So then why do I feel so empty inside?
I walked towards the middle of the park. The most dangerous place in a thunderstorm since there's metal poles embedded into the ground for lighting to attract it. Damn the committee wanting to put tetherball areas around.
But I didn't care… I came here for a reason… I'm gonna do it. I stare up at the sky, my eyes squinting because of the drops from the rain, the clouds looking so gray, the wind blowing my hair, sounds of thunder and lightning threatening to strike. I point to that dangerous sky.
"Are you happy? Are you happy where you are Yami? Do you even care what you have done to me? Did you even consider what you were leaving? You left Anzu! You left Jou! You left Kaiba! You left Honda! You left Grandpa! And you left me! I loved you damn it and I still do now!" I was so angry at him! All because I'm a selfish bastard!
But I didn't care… I did not fucking care!
"Come back to us! Come back to me! I know I'm not enough… I'll never be as brave as you, be strong enough, clever enough, and gorgeous enough… but I still want you here! Everyone does… Don't you miss me? Did you even care about me?" I fell to my knees and I punched the ground beneath me in frustration knowing that no one is listening to me…
Then the most earsplitting thunder crashed that I have ever heard of my life. Alarmed, I stare up into the sky and the clouds are splitting apart so the sun's rays are seeping through, but only enough for it to spotlight on my. The bandage on my forehead has fallen off and the blood is now dripping thing streams of it down my face and dripping off my chin.
I'm sorry, My Love. Please forgive me…What the Hell was that? I stare up at the small part of blue sky using my hand to block the sun's rays.
Forgive me. I had not known…There it was again! Who is that? I can barely recognize him.
I love you as well my dear Yugi. I'm sorry for leaving you.
"Yami! Is that really you! Say its you!" I yell to the sky. I start to tear up again.
Oh Heavens above, please say its him!
I want to be with you, My Yugi…It was him!
"Yami! I want to be with you as well!" Was all I could yell back at him.
I know it was me that told him to go to the afterlife, but did anyone ask what he wanted? Did he even know what he wanted? I know I didn't force him too, but…
I want to come back…I know it was me that told him to go to the afterlife, but did anyone ask what he wanted? Did he even know what he wanted? I know I didn't force him too, but…
I want to come back…I know it was me that told him to go to the afterlife, but did anyone ask what he wanted? Did he even know what he wanted? I know I didn't force him too, but…
I KNOW IT WAS ME THAT TOLD HIM BUT STILL!
"WHAT DO YOU WANT YAMI?"
I WANT TO COME BACK!Then the clouds blocked the blue sky patch up and winds blew harder than before that I could almost feel my bodying being pushed away, rain was being sprayed into my face, and thunder was crashing louder than ever, so loud that the earth beneath me was vibrating. I put my arms in front of me to help block out the wind and rain going to my face, though it was useless. I put them back down and as quickly as it came, a lightning bold has struck in front of me only being a few yards away. I fell back in surprise and couldn't believed what had happened. I was trying to suck in all the things that had just happened. Was Yami really talking to me? Did he say that he really loves me? I managed to get up with confusion in my eyes and ran towards the giant opening that lies only a few yards… feet… inches…
Smoke was actually clearing in the hole? I can't see anything inside! The wind blows it away for me and I hop inside skidding my shoes and sliding down towards the bottom. Soon I came to a stop as something stops me and I fall right on top of something soft and yet warm… I get up and stay on my knees and…and… and…
Jaysus Mehry and Saint Joseph!
Its… its… oh God… its…
"Yami." I breathe out his name. He was in his pharaoh clothes… starting to get wet in the rain and he was smokin'! No really he was! Steam was coming out of his body!
I stare at him in awe as he lays there passed out… He's just lying there! But then it registers in my mind that we're still out here in this storm.
I touch his cheek to make sure he's real. Wow… he is… really really is… He's warm, soft…smooth… but another thunder crash gave me another reality check.
"Gotta get him home!" I pick him up as best as I could and gave him a piggyback ride. Damn right now I wish I was a little bit taller because I'm dragging his feet! Damn this is embarrassing! I stop by a near by market and "borrowed" one of their shopping carts…
I snort. I just bought a Pharaoh. Even at a time like this I can still make a joke. Yay… Yugi, King of Jokes and the Ha Ha's! I can still make myself smile, but not as much as Yami can.
I'm pushing the cart all the way home, still wishing I had brought an umbrella to help shield him from the rain, but too bad I didn't.
We arrive at the Kami Game Shop and I unlock the doors. My back and Yami's front are covered in mud because of that crater. Great. More cleaning time, but fuck it for now. I get Yami off the cart (and I still don't even know how I put him in let alone out!) and bring him inside. I lock the door again and haul ass upstairs. And stick him in the guest bedroom. I gently laid him on the floor and blushed as I stared.
I have to clean him up!
My hands start to shake as I pry off all the jewelry and the clothes he's wearing. Why do Egyptians wear dresses? I snort at that and grab a wet towel and some dry clothes. I clean off all the mud on him until I notice that when I started to clean one side of his cheek that a crimson drop has landed on his beautiful cheek. Damn, I completely forgot about that. I use my wet sleeve to wipe it off my face, but I think that has just made it worse, but I didn't care. My main priority is Yami so I keep on fixing him up.
After about an hour and a half, he was dry and wearing pajamas that were too big for me that Grandpa got me for Christmas one year. They were light blue just like my old ones, but I think he still has high hopes for me of growing taller.
I gently heave Yami up on the nice dry comfy bed and lay some covers on him to keep him warm. After I was done taking care of him, then its back to me.
I need a friggin' shower…
So I go back to my room grab a pajamas I was wearing before, dry towel and heaved my ass to the shower. I stripped of my clothing and just left it on the floor, went into the shower, turned it on and just let the blood from head and the mud on my neck wash off. My forehead was stinging me for a bit, but I didn't care. Many thoughts were going through my head. "Is he really here? Is this a dream?" saying aloud hoping to the higher powers that be telling me that what I'm seeing is the truth and if this is a dream, may I never wake up.
And may I never wake up as well my Aibou.
I jerk my head up straight and realized I had heard that beautiful seductive voice again in my head. I turn off the shower and dry myself quickly. I put on my clothes and ran down the hallway to the guest bedroom. I'm at the doorway panting and I see him sitting up in bed.
"What I wanted all along was to be by your side, Yugi." He smiles at me and looks at me so lovingly with those crimson ruby eyes…
But I just couldn't say anything. I'm too stunned! Why won't my fucking voice say anything! Earth to voice box! SAY SOMETHING!
"I-uh… That is I mean!" I look down at embarrassment. Wow the carpet in this bedroom is red! How come I never noticed this!
Yami just chuckles. He pats the bed near him indicating that I should sit by him. I nervously walk by and sit a little far that he wanted. He just keeps smiling at me!
"You know I heard everything you said." He tells me.
"Really?" Shit! I was sounding like such a bastard! I'm a big bastard I am! "You know I didn't mean it when I called you inconsiderate and a jackass right?" I sounded like such an idiot!
"Its not your fault Yugi. I should have stayed when my heart belonged with you all this time. And of course you are more than enough for me my Aibou." He scoots near me then puts his arm around me. I lean in and place my head on his shoulder bringing my knees up.
"Even though spirits belong in the afterlife in all and I thought that's what you wanted all along. I should have asked you what you really wanted Yami. I'm so sorry." More blood creeps down my forehead and Yami catches it with his finger to feel the warm drop of life.
"What happened to your forehead?" He asks with great worry in his voice.
"Oh…um. That? Well you see I was just frustrated with something and I accidentally banged my head on the window." I was ready to get up to go the bathroom until he stopped me. He places a hand on my wound and closed his eyes. The area glowed yellow and I felt warmth go through me. It was less than a minute and he place his hand back down on his lap. I felt up my forehead and noticed that the wound was gone! I guess he still has some powers up his sleeve.
"Thanks." I said as he kissed my forehead and locked eyes with me.
"I have missed you so Yugi."
"I've missed you too Yami."
Then he embraces me. Not like a brotherly or friendly hug, but I feel so much love in this embrace. I could stay in his arms for all time. We slowly lie down onto the bed and get comfortable.
"Yami?"
"Hm?"
"Why did you come back? Didn't you want to be home with your family and friends?" I asked worriedly to him, thinking that he had regrets.
"I did Yugi. I was happy to see them all again until one saying that most people believed in brought me back to you."
I did not turn around and I can feel his breathing on my neck. His arms wrapped around my waist and he brought me closer to him and I closed my eyes and I could tell that he did as well.
"Yugi… Home is where the heart is."
I smiled and he fell asleep for his breathing was steady. And soon, I later dreamed of everything that will come to be of happiness, sorrow, good times and the bad times, but we'll face them together.
The End.
