Yo! I take it you got curious with the title? Well then, welcome, welcome! This is my first Hunter X Hunter fic, but not my first ever fic so you don't have to worry about newbie material here. I've watched Hunter X Hunter from A to Z, including the old version so I know them by heart. My fave character...Kurapika of course! And not just because he's got a pretty face, much more than that really.

I recommend those who haven't heard/watch the drama CD on youtube to haul your butts there, NOW. Really..it'll scar a young, innocent person's mind! But my mind's been scarred discreetly by my friends, so I'm good. The title of the video..written in bold down there so I shall leave you to your light reading.

Ignore the parallel universe crap thing, I needed something to use as an excuse.

Enjoy...


It was a lovely, bright and sunny day where cheerfulness hangs in the air and people are just generally happy. Kurapika and Leorio are lounging in Yorknew's library since the latter needs some material for his medical exam. Kurapika simply stood by him because Leorio needed a friend and Gon and Killua are off somewhere.

"Hey Kurapika, what're you doing by the computer?" the young man asks when he notices the blonde sitting by said computer for nearly half an hour now. Kurapika said nothing, merely typing away furiously as if he has some sort of vengeance on the keyboards.

Curious, Leorio jumps down and pulls a chair next to the young Kurutan as Kurapika continues to browse through videos.

"Look, Leorio. With this Hunter Pass, you can browse videos from all around the world, including those inaccessible before. Surprisingly, there's a connection to a different world much like ours, only different. Kind of like a parallel universe and we can watch their posted videos through this website called 'Youtube'," Kurapika explains with an intrigued smile on his face.

Leorio hums slightly and seems to be just as interested, when he notices a title that caught his immediate attention; Kurapika & Leorio: Moody Restaurant. Kurapika seems to notice his sudden attention and stares at the computer screen to which, he too got intrigued.

"I wonder what this is," the young doctor-to-be asks no one in particular and clicks on the aforementioned video. "Apparently it's some sort of drama CD,"

"There's no video, but there is a voice," Kurapika drawls out slowly as the video finally buffers completely. To their surprise, the voice coming from the video is identical to Leorio's and the young doctor could only splutter in shock.

Your hosts will be me, your scent sachet; Leorio.

And me, the candlelight by the crescent moon; Kurapika.

"Why do you sound so...flirtatious?" Kurapika asks slowly as if Leorio's planning some sort of scheme on him. Leorio gaped slightly at the video and turns his attention to Kurapika.

"Me? Why do you sound so feminine?! And, candlelight by the crescent moon, what the hell?" he wheezes out, voice completely betraying him and coming out as a high pitched squeal. Kurapika was about to retaliate when he heard his voice again.

Hmm, I'm somewhat hungry. Ah, there's a lovely restaurant over there... Alright. Clink, clink, clink.

Leorio had to cover his mouth to stop the onslaught of laughter when he heard the 'chimes' while Kurapika nudges him hard on the ribs. They were about to trade insults when 'Leorio's' voice came up.

Welcome.

Hey, Leorio.

No. I might look like him, but I am the waiter.

Oh, I'm sorry.

"You sound so lecherous!" Kurapika shrieks out and he faces the older teen with a face that could rival his Scarlet Eyes. "And what is this, role play?!"

Leorio quickly covers his mouth as people are starting to stare at them. "Will you pipe down? This is still a library and... What do you mean I sound so lecherous? This you is just so damn feminine-ish I can't even tell it's you anymore!" Leorio hisses at his companion as the video continues to play.

A table for one?

Yes, I'm alone.

Well then. I will show you the way. Please, have a seat.

Thank you.

Leorio almost died of a heart attack when he heard his counterpart being so flirty with Kurapika's counterpart. And the way Kurapika's counterpart simply said he's alone is enough to make anyone think that this drama CD thing is a porno audio!

Please have a look at our menu.

Umm...thank you.

First, how's about an aperitif?

Thank you... Ah, no, that's... This is awkward.

What's wrong?

I am...well, underage.

Underage... Underage!

Kurapika's breathing hitches when he heard the somewhat excited tone in the drama CD's Leorio's voice. "Do you have something for underage teenagers, Leorio?" the blonde hisses out as he glares daggers at the older man who's still holding him from the back.

Leorio notices their position and releases Kurapika with an awkward cough and a slight blush on his cheeks. "Hey, at least I didn't drug you when we first met!" Leorio shot back with fire. Kurapika growls slightly when his counterpart continues.

Is there something wrong with that?

No, please excuse me. That's too bad, but... It can't be helped.

I regret it too.

Both of them snorted at the same time and flinches when they realized they were in sync. Really, this drama CD's taking a nosedive and the more they listen to it, the more they wonder if it's not some sort of BL story.

Well then, how about your order...

Hmm... This is difficult... There are so many choices. I can't decide.

"Well, at least now it sounds like a restaurant instead of some crappy, flirtatious, m-rated CD that should be under the PG-13 rules or 18SX rules or something like that," Leorio grumbles out and takes out a water bottle to drink.

Beside him, Kurapika merely nods his head in agreement and grabs a nearby dumpling the librarians place just for visitors.

Don't worry... Please, go ahead.

Ah-please wait a minute. I still haven't...prepared...

It's okay. It's only embarrassing in the beginning... There... Your order please.

The reaction at the computer is instantaneous. Leorio spits out the water after barely turning his head away from the computer while Kurapika chokes on the dumpling and almost died right then and there.

"What...the fuck?" Leorio wheezes out after catching his breath while Kurapika still tries to dislodge anymore dumpling pieces that are stuck to his windpipe. "What's so embarrassing about making an order?"

"And what preparations do you need? Why is it I'm breathing so hard in there?" Kurapika shrieks out once his lungs are clear again. There was a warning cough from the Head Librarian and the two silences once more.

Well then... Mozzarella cheese, the Kurapika in the drama CD moans and breathes out. The real Kurapika could only whimper when he heard himself sound like a whore while Leorio tries to grasp the fact that he's actually listening to Kurapika, though not the real him, breathes and moans with such lust.

Certainly, sir... Mozzarella cheese, right?

Yes...!

The moment drama Leorio grunts like that, the real Leorio sprang to his feet. "That's it; get that Hunter Pass out NOW before people start to think we're watching gay porn in the middle of the day while at a stinking library!"

Kurapika quickly does as he was told only to find the pass somehow, unluckily stuck to the slot. Try as he might, he couldn't pull the pass without damaging it and the CPU at the same time. And to add more to both their bad luck, Kurapika accidentally hits the volume button and raises it to its max.

Mozzarella cheese, please!

To their horror, that particular sentence is heavily laced with grunts and moans, that and the whole library heard them. Kurapika and Leorio stood in shock, both trying to pull the Hunter Pass out of the slot while the Head Librarian coughs with embarrassment, face red and all.

Ah... Do you want anything else?

Well then... Well...then...

"For the love of... This seriously makes you sound like a prostitute," Leorio groans out as he face palms himself to cover his bright red face while his other hand lowers the volume. They had given up at pulling the damnable pass and opted to listen to the video 'till the end.

"I just hope Gon and Killua won't return and think we're doing stuff," Kurapika huffs out, looking everywhere except Leorio and the computer screen.

More... Gather your courage more...

The two whimper when they heard drama Kurapika breathes hard like that and drama Leorio grunting away like he's doing some...heavy work. Kurapika tries his best not to run away, or cower, or cover his ears, or all three while Leorio hums a tune to drown the noise.

Well then... Vongole...bianco.

Vongole Bianco!

...Please!

"At least it's ending, that's for sure," the Kurutan mumbles out after hearing his counterpart groans out like that. He could see from the corner of his eyes that Leorio is twitching slightly, unable to drown the noise of the video.

Very well. Well then, please choose your last entrée.

Do I have to choose more? I can't... Take anymore...!

"Oh god...you do sound like a prostitute here. And why the hell is it so hard to choose three menus? What kind of drama CD is this? Who made this?" Leorio shrieks out as he points the computer. Kurapika twitches when he heard Leorio calls him a prostitute and felt like a girl for not defending his rights.

"Why are you calling me the prostitute when it was you who felt me up?" the blonde yells back to which they both got a warning hush. They quiet down and glare daggers at each other when Leorio's counterpart spoke up again.

No... This is the last one... Go ahead...!

Well then... Well then... Pe-

Pe-...

Pe-...!

P-p-pe-...

'Please don't make him say what I think he's going to say,' was their thought as trembles shook their body. Powerless to do anything about it, Leorio's body somehow had forgotten how to sit straight and slumps down towards Kurapika, knocking them down to the floor just as Gon and Killua joins them.

Pepperoncino!

The two younger boys stop dead in their tracks when they heard the loud moan and Kurapika and Leorio sprawled on the floor. Gon turns to the beet red Killua.

"Did Kurapika just call out 'Leorio' in that tone? Why is that?" he asks innocently while Killua tries to regain control over his brain. Kurapika and Leorio shot up and shake their heads frantically.

"I didn't call out 'Leorio' in that tone! It's pepperoncino and it wasn't me who said it! It was another me from a parallel universe similar like ours but it's not ours and... Stop staring at me like that!" Kurapika screeches out with a red face. The younger boys could even see steam coming out of his ears if they concentrate enough.

Understood, sir! Please wait a little while then.

Ah... No... I'm full.

Thankfully, the video finally ends and the Hunter Pass ejected automatically while Leorio stares at the now darkened computer screen. "You know, I wonder what that other Kurapika is full of? I mean, he's only done his orders and haven't got his food yet,"

"Please, Leorio...just don't," Kurapika whimpers out as he retrieves his pass. Gon and Killua still stare at them, one with innocence, and the other with skeptical. "It's just a drama CD; you know Hunters have access to a parallel world to ours, don't you?"

"Of course I do. But the question is, why'd you decide to listen to a drama CD of you two banging each other?" he may be 12, but that doesn't mean he doesn't know stuff, that and he's not ashamed of making people feel awkward.

Kurapika and Leorio inches away from each other after what Killua had said. "We didn't. We got curious while browsing through videos and an order in a restaurant turned out to be so much more," Leorio answers with a slight hint of blush on his cheeks. "We even accidentally blow the speakers to max,"

"And we couldn't turn it off so we had to listen to the whole thing," Kurapika says sounding quite defeated.

"Why didn't you just mute the volume?" Gon asks with his usual cheerful voice. Kurapika's and Leorio's eyes nearly pop out of their sockets at the realization before screaming away. Leorio stomps out of the library, muttering how he'll never come back while Kurapika slumps away saying how he'll dress like a girl from now on to avoid shame.

All in all, it was a lovely, bright and sunny day where cheerfulness hangs in the air and people are just generally happy. Well, except Kurapika and Leorio that is. Oh, and Gon and Killua decided to check that particular video out since the other two forgot to delete their history.

"Killua, why is it filled with heavy breathing and why does Kurapika talk like that?"

"No, Gon. Don't ask me, and don't mention this at all, ever."


I almost died laughing when I listened to that drama CD.. And I'm still laughing now. Any mistakes, leave a review and I'll check them out. But you guys have got to listen to it. Just search on youtube, it's there and it's seriously... You know what..make of what you want. Those two are canon anyway.

I shall now go and find something else that's quite entertaining to watch. A bored me is a dangerous me. Cya~ Leave a review, or those moans will haunt you in your sleep!