The Right Call
Freedom77
Disclaimer: I own no part of Supernatural and am in no way affiliated with it. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: While I was re-watching 'The Born-Again Identity' I couldn't help but wonder what happened to Daphne after Emmanuel never came back. I couldn't stand the thought of her waiting for him for the rest of her life so I wrote this to appease myself. Thank you for reading and I hope that you enjoy! Feedback is much appreciated!
He needed to do it, just get it over and done with. He needed to pick up the phone and dial, as soon as possible so that they could get out of this horrible place that held few good memories for Dean Winchester. This was the good and kind thing to do. Right? Because breaking a girl's heart was always the best course of action. Because taking all her hopes and dreams and crushing them was always better for everyone involved. Because telling her that the one she loved would never be coming back was always the best thing to do.
"What are you, five? Just pick up the phone and dial!" Sammy said exasperated after having watched his brother stare at the phone for a full ten minutes and not call anyone, before he disappeared into the bathroom to finish brushing his teeth.
He didn't know what the call was. Didn't understand how much it would hurt the woman on the other end, didn't realize how much it would hurt Dean to make it. But all the same, he was right: Dean just needed to dial.
And so, with a heavy heart he flipped open his phone and dialed her number. The phone rang three times and he almost hoped that she wouldn't be there to pick up but despite of them, she answered on the fourth ring.
"Hello?" Daphne Allen asked. She was sweet, nice, innocent. Unsuspecting of the news that he was going to give her.
"Yeah, hello, uh…Dean. Dean Winchester." He cleared his throat, trying to talk clearly. He hadn't even gotten to the hard part and he couldn't even talk, this wasn't going too well. "I—Emmanuel helped me."
"Yes, of course. Dean, you saved me from that Demon." She answered and he could hear the smile in her voice; it broke his heart.
"Yeah, yes I did." He nodded. Sam came out to stare at him quizzically, sensing that something was wrong without needing to be told. "Yeah…um…" He trailed off because truth be told he hadn't actually figured out what he was going to tell her. He only knew he had to tell her something. It was what he would have wanted if he was in her position.
"What is it?" She asked and there was a hint of fear in her intuitive voice. "Is Emmanuel okay?"
This was it, the moment to lie. The moment to save her from a life of eternal heartbreak and the inevitable feelings of betrayal. Or he could let her live that life and maybe, by some miracle, she would never feel those things, maybe she would always hope and keep her faith and constantly pray. Who knew, maybe her Angel would hear her and wake up from his comatose state. But Dean couldn't do that to her. He knew what it was like to live your life hoping, praying for someone to return and yet knowing deep down they were either dead or they just didn't care. He understood just how much that life cost and he didn't want anyone to live like that, not if he could help it. And in this instance, he could.
Of course this case was different. But as he sat there with the phone to his ear, he had to wonder, was it really that different? Emmanuel was dead, or at least the man she had known. Cass may as well have been dead from the way he had been acting when Dean and Sam had left him in that hospital. So, was he really lying to her?
But he knew the answer to that as well, because he knew what he would think if he found out that someone had told him that Sam was dead and all the while he was really alive, just a different version of the man he had been—broken, insane, and probably would never wake up from his nightmares, but still him. Dean would probably hunt down those who had lied to him and kill them. The answer was yes, he was lying. But it was the right thing to do.
"Um…no." Dean responded after only a moment's pause. "He um…He…Something happened when we reached the hospital. Uh…" He stood up and began to pace, Sam's eyes following him as he tried to come up with a plausible lie that she wouldn't be able to see through.
Something had happened alright. Four Demons and a blocked path to Sam until they convinced their Angel that he could smite all of them with or without his memories.
"We were there and one of the patients at the hospital got hold of a knife and just went crazy and he…went after one of the other patients and Emmanuel stepped in front of it."
An insane and dying Sam lying on the bed until their full-throttle Angel came up with a way to shift Dean's brother's insanity to Cass himself.
"And…Daphne, I'm so sorry but he…he didn't make it."
He didn't make it out of the hospital at least, because that's where he was right now, sitting in the bed where an orderly had placed him, still staring into space his eyes seeing nothing of reality only the painful memories of Lucifer and his Hell.
"Emmanuel is…dead?" She asked in a blank tone.
"Yes, I'm so sorry." He said again because he didn't know what else to tell her. Just don't ask questions he begged her but she didn't listen to his unheard pleas.
"Where—where is his…body?" She whispered and he knew she was trying so hard to keep it all together for his sake.
"Um…there was none." Dean froze, unable to think of anything fast enough. What was wrong with him, he had been lying his whole life, why was he stumbling his way through this conversation like a kindergartner who had gotten caught doing something wrong?
"What do you mean there's no body? I can't even bury my husband?" She asked but her voice was still so soft, barely containing her grief.
"Um, the patient," Dean said quickly, "he also had a lighter and when he realized what—what he did he burned himself an—and the body." He nodded absently. Yeah, that would work, he supposed. Sam raised his eyebrows at his lie and Dean shrugged in response. It was the best he could come up with at the moment.
"Oh." She said and he knew that he was about to lose her. To be honest, she was handling it much better then he would have been able to. "I see."
"Um, I am so so sorry. I wish…I don't know." He shook his head and sat down next to Sam on the bed, unable to come up with any real consolation. He had never been good with comforting people, especially if he happened to be the one delivering the bad news and the cause of it in the first place.
"Was it…" She paused for a moment before continuing. "Was it quick or did he…suffer?"
"No. No." Dean answered, trying to give her what peace he could. "It was fast. He didn't feel anything, and he was gone before the fire, so it was quick. He didn't feel a thing."
"Thank the Lord." Daphne responded, her voice thick with tears.
The Lord, yeah, not so much. Dean thought angrily, God didn't care about his Angel, didn't care about the Humans he supposedly loved so much, didn't care about anything. So why thank Him? But, Dean was glad in an odd way, let her have her perfect God. Let her live in ignorance of what the real God was like and maybe this whole thing wouldn't be so bad for her.
"Um, I don't know." She laughed and there was a hint of hysteria rising in it. "Thank you for calling. Should I be expecting…someone else calling, I don't know, this...is all really new."
"No, no." He shook his head even though she couldn't see it. "Um, I asked them if I could call you and tell you. I feel responsible for his death in a way—he was only there because of me and I just felt that I should be the one to tell you." Sam closed his eyes and gently set his hand on Dean's shoulder in comfort.
And it was his fault. His fault that Emmanuel wasn't out in the world curing the crazy, healing the sick, saving the helpless. His fault because he had searched the miracle worker out, having no idea who this Emmanuel guy was until he had seen him at the bottom porch, a wondering look on his face as he gently asked, "What was that?" His fault because even after realizing that Emmanuel didn't remember who he was or what he had done, Dean had still asked him to save Sam. Still took him on a trip to a hospital full of Demons. Still asked him to remember that he was Castiel, an Angel of the Lord. Still asked him to fix it, even though the Angel—fresh with all his memories-wanted so desperately to leave. Still gave him back his coat. Still let him promise Dean that he would be fine. Still let Cass shift Sam's insanity and his memories to himself. Still let him save Sammy. So it was his fault. But, Daphne didn't need to know any of that.
"No, please, don't." She asked gently. "Emmanuel loves…healing was his joy in life, and he would hate it if you lived your life always blaming yourself for his…death. He would say it was his choice not yours. So, please, just—if you want to honor his memory, don't. Just don't blame yourself."
He closed his eyes in regret and nodded. Regret because that was something that Cass would have said—if he had been capable of talking. Regret because whatever her words, he still blamed himself for Emmanuel's 'death'. "Okay, thanks. I'll try. Again, I am so sorry." He started to hang up but her voice stopped him.
"Dean. Tell me something please." She requested her voice breaking. "Did he heal your brother before he died?"
A tear threatened to fall from Dean's eyes as he stared at his brother—alive and well, sitting right next to him. "Yeah, yes. Ca—Emmanuel healed Sammy. Saved his life."
"Good. I'm glad." She whispered and with that she hung up the phone but not before he heard the first sob tear through her.
He wiped his eyes and tossed the phone on the bed. There, he had done it. He didn't feel any better after doing it though, in fact he felt worse. Funny how that usually was the deal when you did the right thing.
"That was kind of you." Sam stated, drawing Dean out of his depressing thoughts. "To do that for her."
"You should have seen them, man." Dean explained sadly. "They were in love—and I mean the whole deal. Married, rings, love—it was all there. The way he looked at her and she was so protective of him. Then he was talking about her on the way to the hospital and…I don't know, man, they were just kind of perfect for each other." Dean shook his head and shrugged, remembering it as a time long ago though it had only been a day or so. "I just, I think she would have waited for the rest of her life for him to come back and…he's not going back. I just didn't want her to live her life waiting for him, you know? Better if she thinks he's dead then to live always hoping, yet never sure. You know?"
Sam nodded in understanding. "Still, it's sad. He finally found happiness and he gave it all up without a second thought for us. Again. Guess he hadn't changed as much as we thought."
"Yeah, I guess not." He stood up suddenly, feeling a fierce desire to leave this whole ordeal behind them as fast as his beloved Impala could carry them—yet another mess that he was running from. "Come on, let's get out of here."
Dean wanted to leave this place as far behind him as possible, wanted to put as much distance between the phone-call and himself as he could. Wanted to erase that sob from his memory. But he couldn't, so instead he and Sam drove away and left behind them an innocent widow with a damaged heart and a broken Angel with Hell in his eyes.
