The Return Of Salem the Person
"Sabrina, is today some special day? I have it marked on my calendar for some strange reason," Hilda said trying to remember why she marked the date on her calendar.
"I don't know, maybe you planned a date with some guy," Sabrina suggested.
"No, no, that can't be it, I would remember that." Hilda replied as Zelda walked into the kitchen sleepily with her robe on.
"Oh, Zelda! Do you know why I have today marked on my calendar?"
"No, mayb." Zelda started as a strange young man walked down the stairs.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!! GET OUT OH HERE!!" Zelda screamed for she only had a robe on. She zapped her finger and soon was beating the man with a baseball bat.
"Ow! Ow! Stop, Zelda, it's me, remember? Salem! Don't you have it marked on your calendar that I was coming back today?" Salem asked, defensively.
"So that's why I had my calendar marked"
"Nooooo, you think?" Salem asked sarcastically.
"So, Salem, have you learned your lesson about conquering the world yet? The witches council did threaten to turn you into a doorstop. and you learned the hard way that they don't kid around"
"I know, I know. I am just happy to be in a human body"
"Good" Sabrina said, happily satisfied.
"Isn't it time for lunch? I have a craving for a tuna catfish dinner"
"Ok, that's another thing. Now that you are human, you have to start feeding yourself" Sabrina told him. At that, Salem walked over to the cupboard and took out a can of cat food.
"Oh and humans don't eat cat food! You at least should eat plain tuna"
"Fine by me!" Salem said grabbing a can tuna.
"Boy, is it good to have hands again". After he finished his tuna, he went decided he was going to go to Ancient Egypt to visit his good friend, Cleopatra. He zapped himself there and Cleopatra ran to greet him.
"Oh, Salem, it has been so long! What shall we do today? Go fishing at my castle, take a ride on my new boat?"
"Let's do both while we catch up with lost time"
"So, where have you been?" Cleopatra asked when they got to the best spot for fishing.
"At Sabrina's. I was her pet"
"Her pet?" Cleopatra questioned
"Yes, I was her pet cat. You see, I got turned into a cat by the witch's council because I tried to conquer the world" Salem explained.
"Oh, it sounds like fun! I wish I could have done that. Oh, Salem, why don't we try it again? Only now you have a princess helping you and you will be much more successful!" Cleopatra said, dramatically.
"Oh, I don't know. I mean." Salem started.
"Please?" Cleopatra begged with her puppy dog eyes.
"Oh, I guess so" And then the two started making plans.
After two days, the plans were complete and they were ready to conquer the world. And of course, they did. or at least they attempting to.
"Well, well. If it isn't Salem Saberhagen. What an unpleasent surprise. And oh dear, this time you've dragged poor Cleopatra into you're world domination idea. Puh! You do remember me telling you that you would be turned into a doorstop if you tried to dominate the world again, correct?" the witch's council head reminded Salem sneakily.
"Actually, I wanted to dominate the world. I dragged Salem into it" Cleopatra expained.
"After what Salem has done in the past, I don't believe you" she replied while lifting her finger to turn Salem into a doorstop. She zapped while mumbling a few quiet words and soon poor innocent Salem was a doorstop.
"You will be human again in a thousand years. As for you, Princess Cleopatra. I cannot punish you for it would clearly ruin history" Then, the head of the witch's council mumbled a few words and disspeared.
"I am very sorry, Salem. oh how stupid I feel talking to a doorstop. Farewell! Oh, wait how can you farewell? You are a doorstop!" And with that, snotty ol' Cleopatra walked away. Soon enough, Sabrina, Zelda, and Hilda appeared and told him off. After his scolding, he said,
"You will bring me home, right?"
"Oh, alright" They carried him away and put him in a cushioned little box for him to wait until his time as a doorstop was over.
"Sabrina, is today some special day? I have it marked on my calendar for some strange reason," Hilda said trying to remember why she marked the date on her calendar.
"I don't know, maybe you planned a date with some guy," Sabrina suggested.
"No, no, that can't be it, I would remember that." Hilda replied as Zelda walked into the kitchen sleepily with her robe on.
"Oh, Zelda! Do you know why I have today marked on my calendar?"
"No, mayb." Zelda started as a strange young man walked down the stairs.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!! GET OUT OH HERE!!" Zelda screamed for she only had a robe on. She zapped her finger and soon was beating the man with a baseball bat.
"Ow! Ow! Stop, Zelda, it's me, remember? Salem! Don't you have it marked on your calendar that I was coming back today?" Salem asked, defensively.
"So that's why I had my calendar marked"
"Nooooo, you think?" Salem asked sarcastically.
"So, Salem, have you learned your lesson about conquering the world yet? The witches council did threaten to turn you into a doorstop. and you learned the hard way that they don't kid around"
"I know, I know. I am just happy to be in a human body"
"Good" Sabrina said, happily satisfied.
"Isn't it time for lunch? I have a craving for a tuna catfish dinner"
"Ok, that's another thing. Now that you are human, you have to start feeding yourself" Sabrina told him. At that, Salem walked over to the cupboard and took out a can of cat food.
"Oh and humans don't eat cat food! You at least should eat plain tuna"
"Fine by me!" Salem said grabbing a can tuna.
"Boy, is it good to have hands again". After he finished his tuna, he went decided he was going to go to Ancient Egypt to visit his good friend, Cleopatra. He zapped himself there and Cleopatra ran to greet him.
"Oh, Salem, it has been so long! What shall we do today? Go fishing at my castle, take a ride on my new boat?"
"Let's do both while we catch up with lost time"
"So, where have you been?" Cleopatra asked when they got to the best spot for fishing.
"At Sabrina's. I was her pet"
"Her pet?" Cleopatra questioned
"Yes, I was her pet cat. You see, I got turned into a cat by the witch's council because I tried to conquer the world" Salem explained.
"Oh, it sounds like fun! I wish I could have done that. Oh, Salem, why don't we try it again? Only now you have a princess helping you and you will be much more successful!" Cleopatra said, dramatically.
"Oh, I don't know. I mean." Salem started.
"Please?" Cleopatra begged with her puppy dog eyes.
"Oh, I guess so" And then the two started making plans.
After two days, the plans were complete and they were ready to conquer the world. And of course, they did. or at least they attempting to.
"Well, well. If it isn't Salem Saberhagen. What an unpleasent surprise. And oh dear, this time you've dragged poor Cleopatra into you're world domination idea. Puh! You do remember me telling you that you would be turned into a doorstop if you tried to dominate the world again, correct?" the witch's council head reminded Salem sneakily.
"Actually, I wanted to dominate the world. I dragged Salem into it" Cleopatra expained.
"After what Salem has done in the past, I don't believe you" she replied while lifting her finger to turn Salem into a doorstop. She zapped while mumbling a few quiet words and soon poor innocent Salem was a doorstop.
"You will be human again in a thousand years. As for you, Princess Cleopatra. I cannot punish you for it would clearly ruin history" Then, the head of the witch's council mumbled a few words and disspeared.
"I am very sorry, Salem. oh how stupid I feel talking to a doorstop. Farewell! Oh, wait how can you farewell? You are a doorstop!" And with that, snotty ol' Cleopatra walked away. Soon enough, Sabrina, Zelda, and Hilda appeared and told him off. After his scolding, he said,
"You will bring me home, right?"
"Oh, alright" They carried him away and put him in a cushioned little box for him to wait until his time as a doorstop was over.
