If Tomorrow Never Comes
By: DKM
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Danny/Lindsey
Synopsis: Life can change in the blink of an eye. Will Lindsey be ready for it?
Author's Note: This one's for you, Erin. Thanks for all your help.
Disclaimer: We all know the characters don't belong to me and I'm not making a profit, so quit your bitchin'! Same goes for the song!
OoOoOoOoOoOoO
Tomorrow is not
promised to anyone
Young or old alike
And today might be the
last chance
You get to hold your
loved one tight
So if you're waiting
for tomorrow
Why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never
comes
You'll surely regret
it the rest of your days
-Anonymous
"East 45th and Madison, Montana! You're gonna miss it!" Danny Messer nearly yelled in his thick Staten Island accent at his coworker as she tried to navigate through the congested city streets of mid afternoon New York. "I knew I should have driven," he muttered as she made a quick turn onto their street and parked the black Chevy Avalanche just a few feet away from the Roosevelt Hotel, where their second case of the day was waiting.
"Oh, please, like you could have gotten us here any faster," Lindsey "Montana" Monroe retorted as she got out of the SUV and started to make her way towards the taped off area that was now almost devoid of police officers after grabbing her kit from the back.
"I'll let you off the hook for this one, considering you're still learning the ropes," he replied. "Maybe if you'd let me take you out once, you'd learn a little more quickly." That earned him a dirty look from the small woman as she grabbed hold of the yellow crime scene tape and held it over her head so she could step onto the sidewalk. Just as Danny was about to step under as well, she let it slip out of her hands, smacking him in the face and nearly knocking off his glasses. "Dammit, Lindsey! What the hell was that for?" Danny grabbed the tape and threw it over him so he could enter the crime scene.
"For being unable to take no as an answer," she shot back, her brows furrowed in an angry glare.
"Alright," Danny finally gave up. He was done trying to get her to go out with him, even though he knew, deep down, she was hiding her true feelings. "But one of these days, you're gonna realize you missed out on a good thing."
"Cocky bastard," Lindsey said under her breath as she threw her forensics kit on top of a newspaper dispenser and opened it hastily. She wanted this case to be over as soon as possible since lately spending time with Danny seemed more tense than ever, especially after she'd stood him up for a lunch date a few weeks back. Lindsey knew he had a crush on her, but she wasn't so easily persuaded by his not so subtle advances even though she did harbor some feelings for him that she'd probably never admit to again. Once was enough. Twice was pushing it.
"So, this guy fell off the tenth floor of the Roosevelt Hotel," Danny was saying as he knelt down beside the body and started to look for anything that might indicate a possible homicide. "I highly doubt he just jumped to his death. Look at his suit; Armani. He's also got a wad of cash in his pocket. The guy was living the good life." Lindsey glanced in his direction but wasn't paying much attention as she searched for a fresh pair of latex gloves. "Reminds me a little of Frogger," Danny continued, a grin shining on his face in the warm, midsummer sun.
Lindsey couldn't help the giggle that escaped her lips as her mind rewound to her childhood and the now ancient games she used to play with her friends and family. Finally, she spotted her gloves and pulled out a pair. Getting ready to slip one onto her left hand, she noticed something out of the corner of her eye. A quick turn gave her a full view of the car that was quickly approaching the crime scene. It was an indigo blue Chrysler Crossfire and it was coming up pretty quick; too quick, in fact. Lindsey's eyes widened when she realized that they were now in its direct path. "Danny!" she screamed.
Instincts told Danny to look up at her, but after seeing the panic-stricken expression on her face, he turned around to see the dark blue car heading straight for him. In an overwhelming urge to get away, he jumped to his feet, but reflexes weren't going to save him from the terrible fate that was about to befall him. Instead, Danny braced himself for impact just as the car hopped the curb. Before he could steel himself for the blow, the car's bumper made contact with his body, sending him head first into the windshield with a sickening crunch of glass and bones.
From her place beside the newspaper dispenser, Lindsey watched the scene play out as if it were in slow motion. A chill ran down her spine at the sound of the glass shattering, but her body went numb when she saw Danny roll over the roof and land a few feet from the trunk of the car on his back. It crashed into the side of the hotel a moment later with a loud bang, but she stood there, traumatized, too afraid to move. After a while, her chest started to burn, which is when she realized she'd stopped breathing.
Taking a deep, trembling breath, Lindsey tried to shake the horrible feeling that was now creeping into her body. She couldn't take her eyes off Danny's limp form and tried to blink several times to make sure that this wasn't just some God awful nightmare she was experiencing. "Danny," Lindsey called out to him, her voice sounding small and foreign in her ears. She took a step closer to the wreckage and her co-worker. "Danny," she said a little more loudly this time. When he didn't move, she broke into a full gallop and was at his side in seconds.
Falling to her knees, Lindsey placed her quivering fingers over a pulse point in his neck. The slow, steady beat of his heart told her that he was still alive, but just barely. She looked him over to find a large gash in his forehead that was bleeding profusely, staining the sidewalk red as blood trickled from the wound. She shed the light suit jacket she was wearing and placed it over the gash, hoping to stop the bleeding. With her free hand, she reached into her pants' pocket to grab her phone. After fumbling with it for a few moments, she finally got it open and pressed the first speed dial that connected her with the lab.
After three rings, she finally got an answer. "Bonasera."
"Stella!" Lindsey nearly screamed into the phone. Reality was setting in too fast for her and the instant she realized that Danny was laying beside her in a pool of blood, she lost it. Tears streamed down her face as sobs escaped her trembling lips.
"Lindsey?" Stella Bonasera replied, her gut telling her something was very wrong. She'd never heard anything even close to this come from the young woman on the other end of the phone and added, "Lindsey, what's wrong? Are you okay? Where's Danny?" A series of incoherent mumbles followed, prompting Stella to run out of the AV lab and make a mad dash for her boss's office. She found Mac Taylor sitting at his desk, case folder in hand. He looked up at her, slightly confused and intrigued. Stella put the phone on speaker and laid it on the desk so they could both hear what was going on.
"Oh, God!" Lindsey was sobbing as she rocked back and forth, wishing she would wake up from this nightmare.
"Lindsey, you need to calm down and tell me what's going on," Stella had composed herself now that she was in the presence of her boss. Mac continued to look at her, still puzzled by what was going on. She put her hand over the receiver and whispered, "I think something happened at the crime scene, but Lindsey's too hysterical to say anything."
"Danny…" It was the first coherent word that Lindsey choked out since the beginning of the phone call. Her voice trailed off, but Stella managed to make out the words, "hit by a car…" She glanced at Mac, her eyes wide with disbelief. The final blow came with, "bleeding to death."
"Oh, God," Stella said, her knees almost giving way she as found a chair and quickly sat down, hoping that Lindsey was only making it seem worse than it really was. But deep down, she knew it was that bad. Lindsey Monroe was a strong woman. It would have to take a lot to bring her to tears in such a distraught manner.
"Lindsey, where are you?" Mac finally spoke up, taking control of the situation.
"M-Madison a-and 45th," she stuttered.
"I'll be there soon," he replied, throwing the now forgotten case file on his desk as he stood up and grabbed the keys to another one of the crime lab's Avalanche's from the left drawer. "Stella, you're in charge until I get back," Mac called over his shoulder as he exited his office. "Stay on the line with Lindsey and try to calm her down. I'll call you when I have all the details."
Stella waved a limp hand in his direction, still a little shocked by what was going on. She grabbed the phone and turned off the speaker so no one else could hear what was going on. Without all the details, it was too soon to tell everyone what had happened.
Lindsey, on the other hand, had let the phone drop into her lap, completely forgetting that she was still on the line with anyone. Her focus remained on Danny, who lay motionless at her side. The jacket she had used to suppress the bleeding was now saturated with his blood. It seeped through onto her fingers as she continued to hold it in place. The wail of sirens in the distance was a comforting thought: help was on its way.
But there was no sigh of relief for Lindsey. Her mind had already begun to wander in the direction of "how could I have prevented this?" More tears streamed down her face as she gently whispered, "Oh, Danny… Why did I have to be such a stubborn bitch to you?" The hand that formerly held the phone now reached down and gently brushed a couple specks of dirt off his emotionless face. His paling skin felt cold against her fingertips. "Please don't die," she silently begged the heavens.
The wail of police sirens were now upon the scene, two ambulances and six police vehicles screeching to a halt in front of the hotel. Two paramedics hopped out of the first ambulance and rushed over to the driver of the car while the other two from the second ambulance made their way towards Lindsey. With her mind elsewhere, she didn't see either one of them coming until she felt a hand on her shoulder.
"Miss, could you please move?" the gentle voice of a woman tried to coax Lindsey away from Danny's side, but Lindsey wouldn't move. She wasn't about to leave him. He could die. The thought kept racing through her mind as the paramedic continued to try and coax her into moving away. "Miss, please, I'm here to help him," the woman tried again. She was becoming impatient.
Another hand found its way to Lindsey's shoulder, but this time the voice it belonged to was a familiar one. "Come on, Lindsey," Mac said, "you need to let the woman do her job." She looked up at him, her face puffy red with tear stained mascara running down her pale white cheeks. Her eyes glanced back down at Danny, not wanting to leave his side. Mac gave her a reassuring smile and extended his hand towards her even though it felt like his insides were being torn out after seeing the condition two of his best CSI's were in. "It's all right. Danny's in good hands," he assured her.
Lindsey finally tore herself away from her co-worker's side and grabbed her boss's hand. Mac pulled her up off the ground and was surprised when she turned and threw her arms around him, her head falling against his shoulder as she began to cry once again. Like a father comforting his distraught daughter, he pulled her close for a warm embrace and held her for a long while.
"This is all my fault," Lindsey chanted as she buried her face in Mac's jacket. He continued to hold her even though every molecule of his being wanted to ask her about that afternoon.
"Before we can place blame on anyone, you need to tell me what happened," Mac said as he pulled away from her in a gentle manner that suggested now was a good time to start talking.
Lindsey wiped the tears away from her eyes with the back of her shaking hand and sniffled. It took her some time to find the courage to speak up, but even that wasn't enough to make it coherent. "I… we were… the car came out of nowhere… I tried… but… but…" she rambled before bursting into tears again. "Oh, God, this is all my fault!" she bellowed, her head falling into her hands.
"How is it your fault, Lindsey?" Mac continued to question her, hoping that it would help her get past blaming herself and maybe shed some light on this mystery.
"I didn't see the car soon enough!" Lindsey screamed at him, angrier at herself than her boss. "If I had been paying more attention to my surroundings…"
"Lindsey, there was nothing you could have done to prevent this," Mac replied softly. He could see the possible reasons why she was taking it so hard, but the amount of emotion she was conveying gave him the impression there was more behind her mental anguish than just paying attention to her surroundings.
"I could have said something. I could have done something. I should have just told him. I shouldn't have kept this bottled up inside. I should have just told him everything. He only wanted one reason… Why couldn't I give him that reason? Why did I have to be so stubborn?" Lindsey continued to ramble.
Her latest outburst left Mac scratching his head. "What are you talking about?" he finally asked her.
"Nothing," Lindsey muttered, realizing what she'd just said. It was bad enough feeling responsible for what happened; she didn't need to feel like an idiot for making her real feelings known.
Downcast eyes told Mac that there was something more that she refused to admit. "Alright, when you're ready," he replied, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
"His BP is dropping!" one of the paramedics suddenly yelled to her partner, prompting Lindsey and Mac to turn in their direction to find them working frantically to save their friend.
The lightheaded daze that Lindsey had been in for the last fifteen minutes was quickly returning as her knees turned to jelly. She leaned heavily into Mac's side, steadying herself against his body while her hand clamped over her mouth to hold in the scream that was threatening to escape it. Her tears returned with renewed vigor, shaking her body to the core.
"He's going into shock! His blood pressure is all the way down to 76/40. I've got an erratic pulse too! We need to get another bag of fluids pumped into him and .5mg of epinephrine. This is a potentially fatal situation; we need to get him to a hospital now! Come on people, move it!" the female paramedic ordered as she collared his neck and readied her team to load him on the stretcher. It didn't take more than a couple of moments to get Danny into the ambulance.
Lindsey turned to Mac once again, burying her face in his jacket, unable to watch the scene unfold in front of her. He wrapped a protective arm around her, hoping she'd be okay. There was one more thing he had to find out. "Where are you taking him?" he called to the paramedics just before they shut the door to the ambulance.
" St. Vincent's," the woman shouted back before slamming it closed.
The sirens blared again as Mac watched the ambulance rush away from the scene. He turned to Lindsey and said, "Come on, we're going to the hospital. I'll have Stella come down here and examine the crime scene." He nudged her towards his waiting SUV.
"Okay," Lindsey whimpered, following hesitantly.
