Thank You Very, Very, Very Much

"WAHOOOOOOOOO!" Piotr whooped in joy while throwing confetti everywhere. "Happy day! Happy, happy, happy day!"

"Yay!" Pyro laughed shooting out jets of flame from his pack. "We're free! We're finally free!"

"Free to party!" Remy cheered blowing on a noise maker. The Acolytes were assembled in a very festively decorated Control Room.

"I can not believe it!" Piotr smiled tossing another handful of confetti into the air. "Never before have I ever felt this way!"

"We should make it a holiday!" Pyro make several flames explode like fireworks.

"It is definitely a day worth celebrating!" Remy grinned.

"Oh please," Sabertooth growled while standing off to the side. "You're all pathetic. Getting so worked up over a minor little thing."

"Not so minor to us!" Piotr laughed pointing to the center of the room. A metal coffin lay there with a familiar looking helmet and cape placed upon it. "Though in terms of respect, little is the right word!"

"You said it, mate!" Pyro grinned setting fire to a huge pile of furniture from Magneto's office. "It's about time Mags finally carked it!"

"Too bad we weren't able to watch it happen live," Remy sighed disappointedly. "Good thing we managed to get it all on tape!"

"Oh yeah, I love that video!" Pyro giggled insanely. "I could watch it over and over and over again!" He reached into a cooler and began throwing aluminum cans everywhere. "Ginger ale for everyone!"

"Hey, watch it!" Sabertooth snapped as several cans burst and sprayed ginger ale all over the place.

"I would like to say a few words on this wonderful occasion," Piotr declared stepping before the coffin. "Wait, where is Mastermind?"

"He left already," Sabertooth jerked a thumb over his shoulder. "Grabbed his coat and said he was going back to Italy."

"Oh. Okay," Piotr shrugged and spread his arms towards his teammates. "My friends, what can be said about a man like Magneto? Nothing good that is for sure!"

"Hear, hear!" Remy and Pyro cheered.

"Magneto made us do many bad and horrible things during our time with him," Piotr went on. "And I have to admit, he made me appreciate many things in my life. Now that he is finally gone I will certainly appreciate Magneto no longer being a part of it!"

"Yay!" Remy and Pyro hooted.

"Oh brother," Sabertooth rolled his eyes.

"Magneto was a terrible, terrible person," Piotr continued. "Never caring what happened to us, never helping us with our problems, never giving a kind word to anyone. Yet I still regret that he was killed. Because I wanted to be the one to do it instead!"

"You're not the only one," Sabertooth grunted. "I've wanted to off him ever since he stuck me here with you nuts!"

"I have a few things to say too," Remy spoke up. "Mags was a proud man. Even though he wasn't very nice. Or generous. Nor was he particularly well liked, respected, successful, good looking..."

"Or modest," Sabertooth mocked sarcastically. "Unlike you!"

"Mags was the kind of guy who'd always give you a piece of his mind. Which kinda explains why he was always complaining about losing it," Remy continued. "He had a brain like a steel trap. A steel trap that was broken, rusty, shattered and dull. Magneto seemed to always want to be remembered for something. And I assure you we'll be remembering this moment for a long, long time!"

"Me next! Me next!" Pyro chirped excitedly. "Mags was a mean, nasty, vicious old codger who according to Sabes used some kind of weird doohickey to turn himself into a mean, nasty, vicious, not-so-nearly-as-old codger. Mags wanted to improve the lot of mutants. Which ol' bucket-head ironically did by finally kicking the bucket!"

"Oh geeze," Sabertooth groaned. "I don't even wanna know how long you've been waiting to use that stupid line."

"Thank you for all those wonderful statements. I think they sum up our feelings very, very well," Piotr grinned holding his can of ginger ale high. "So please join me in a toast. To our old boss Magneto. He has gone to a better place. Let us hope we never have to join him!"

"Hooray!" The Acolytes cheered and happily drained their cans.

"And they say I'm the psychotic one," Sabertooth grunted.

Piotr crushed his empty can and casually threw it over his shoulder. He then addressed his fellow Acolytes once more. "Mutants and gentlemen! On behalf of all the people who have assembled here. I would merely like to mention if I may."

"You may!" Remy and Pyro roared.

Piotr bowed and continued. "That our unanimous attitude is one of lasting gratitude. For what our boss has done for us today!"

"Yay!" Remy and Pyro cheered.

"And therefore, I would simply like to say!" Piotr grinned and addressed the coffin. "Thank you very much! Thank you very much! That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me!"

Piotr bent down and spoke directly to Magneto's helmet. "I may sound Double-Dutch! But my delight is such! I feel as if a losing war's been won for me!"

"And if I had a flag I'd hang my flag out!" Piotr leapt up and began dancing directly on top of the coffin. "To add a sort of final victory touch! But since I left my flag at home I'll simply have to say! Thank you very, very, very much!"

"Thank you very, very, very much!" Remy and Pyro cheered and joined in dancing around the coffin.

"I don't believe it," Sabertooth groaned. "Every time I think these fools can't do anything more disturbing they go and raise the bar!"

"Hahahahaha!" Remy laughed leaping up next to Piotr. He smoothly guided him off the coffin and raised his hands in jubilation. "Thank you very much! Thank you very much! That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me!"

Remy blew a kiss towards his feet. "It sounds a bit bizarre! But things the way they are! I feel as if another life's begun for me!"

"You never had a life to begin with," Sabertooth growled.

"And if I had a cannon I would fire it!" Piotr and Pyro sang as Remy tossed charged cards into the air in triumph. "To add a sort of celebration touch!"

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

"But since I left my cannon at home I'll simply have to say! Thank you very, very, very much!" All three Acolytes sang and danced around happily. "Thank you very, very, very much!"

"I'll be thankful when this stupid display is over," Sabertooth winced at the noise. "This whole thing is offensive to the ears!"

"For he's a jolly good fellow! For he's a jolly good fellow!" The other Acolytes laughed and danced around in elation. "For he's a jolly good fellow! And so say all of us!"

"My turn!" Pyro chirped and shoved Remy off the coffin. He leapt up and began stomping on it like mad. "Thank you very much! Thank you very much! That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me!"

Pyro cackled maniacally and kicked up his heels in joy. "It isn't everyday! Good fortune comes me way! I never thought the future would be fun for me!"

"That's it! I'm outta here!" Sabertooth turned and headed out of the room.

"And if I had a bugle I would blow it!" The happy sounds of celebration echoed after him. "To add a sort of how's-your-father touch!"

"Wonder how that Quickbrat would react to that," Sabertooth quipped stomping into Magneto's private office.

"But since I left me bugle at home I'll simply have to say! Thank you very, very, very much!" The other Acolytes were heard whooping merrily. "Thank you very, very, very much!"

"I still don't see anything worth celebrating about," Sabertooth grumbled walking around the almost empty room. "It's not like the boss left us anything...huh?" Sabertooth blinked as he stumbled over a previously hidden compartment in the floor. His eyes grew wide as he inspected its contents. "Cash...gold...diamonds...credit cards! Alright!" Sabertooth grinned and looked up at the ceiling. "Boss, wherever you are, I love you!"

Sabertooth began to dance around the office while waving a fistful of cash in each hand. "Thank you very much! Thank you very much! That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me!

Sabertooth quickly stuffed the loot into his trench coat. "The future looks all right! In fact it looks so bright! I feel as if they're polishing the sun for me!" He grinned and happily skipped out of the room.

"And if I had a drum I'd have to bang it!" Sabertooth waltzed back into the Control Room and joined the other Acolytes dancing and singing their hearts out. "To add a sort of rumty-tumty touch!"

"But since I left my drum at home I'll simply have to say! Thank you very, very, very much!"Piotr and Sabertooth engaged in a final romp over Magneto's coffin right before Remy and Pyro unleashed a barrage of exploding cards and fire at it. "THANK YOU VERY, VERY, VEEERYYY MUUUUUUUUUCH!"

"Aaaaaahhh!" Magneto screamed sitting bolt upright in his bed. He blinked and took a minute to get his bearings. "It was a dream. Just a dream. I'm still alive."

Magneto paused and pondered things for a moment. "Did I just have a precognitive dream? Did I just see a vision of the future?" He considered it for a second. "Na." Magneto scoffed and laid back down drawing the covers over him again. "It's silly to think I could have some kind of secondary precognitive mutant power. Huh, me dying and having it get caught on tape. What are the chances of that?"


Disclaimer: I do not own X-Men: Evolution or the song "Thank You Very Much".