Author's note: I made this up this weekend and felt that it would make a good fan fiction. Hope you enjoy. Sorry for the lateness of my chapters in my story Sleepover fun but there have been times when I am unable to get on the computer or that I need it for homework anyway so I can only do that. Hope you accept my apologies and accept this story as a token of my gratitude to all you fans of Daisukebebop productions. Thanks again, Daisukebebop.
Disclaimer: I do not own DN Angel and Dark does NOT have a child in the manga OR Anime of DN Angel. I also do not own any programme or story in which these jokes may originate from.
Dark's P.O.V
That night I hopped from rooftop to rooftop of buildings as I headed towards the museum. The night was bright with moonshine and clear to welcome the stars. What the heck am I saying all of THIS rubbish for? I know Daisukebebop is just doing this to impress teachers of the English sort but why take out this punishment on me? Daisukebebop is SO going to get punished after this next author's note. Anyway, back to the story.
I love stealing. It's my job, duty and destiny to be the infamous phantom thief Dark who flies in on jet-black wings and it's who I am. But lately, deep inside I keep feeling unwhole and somehow empty. It was the same when I was in Daisuke's body (the ginger kid for those who don't know). It hadn't been like this inside the bodies of other tamers like Daiki (Daisuke's grandpa) for example. But after 40 years of exile to the artwork called the Black Wings I have felt like a big part of me has been missing. But there's no time to worry about that now. The public awaits and I have fan girls to impress
Leaving the museum with a crown on my head. I feel like a king. Now back to running across these damn rooftops. They can be so annoying sometimes especially when the gaps between each one is too big for even I to jump but if I keep to this level of ground then at least it will be harder for the police to catch me. It has always been hard to escape from the police whenever the Chief Commander of the police or 'Chief Creepy boy' I like to joke. But I have a feeling I'm going to dread this afterwards.
As I run across the rooftops I feel a change of pressure under my foot. Do you know the feeling you get under your foot when (God forbid) you step in something soft like dog poo? It was kind of like that except it was something hard and it made a beeping noise. Wait. Why is it doing that? Better check. I began checking for any 'disturbance in the force' as you geeks might say but it was vital to check. Well nothing suspicious. Phew. I'm going to laugh about this with the family tonight.
'I knew Creepy boy wouldn't be here tonight. As if he'd -.'
Suddenly a net pulled under me and yanked me up. I tried to escape but my body wouldn't allow me to due to the shock of the surprise. I can't believe how easily I'm being captured. Locks and cages are no problem for me but nets? A helicopter rose in front of me and the wind generated by the helicopter blades was threatening to tip me about. But there in the helicopter, facing me with a sly smile of satisfaction was none other than Creepy boy himself, Super kid genius. Who could it be? Well give around of applause for Satoshi Hiwatari. Insert slow sarcastic clap here Everything went blank after that like I'd had a sleep bomb thrown at me.
Feeling tired and groggy I came too. My eyesight was blurry for a second but it began to clear. I found myself in a police van with two policemen keeping guard. Lets call them Sergeant Bob and Sergeant Steve. Two? Surely I'm worth MORE than two guards. I found that my clothes stank of alcohol and my face and hair were dripping wet. Sniffing my clothes suspiciously I found that I had been sprayed with champagne. It was like Mexico all over again. (See Sleepover fun chapter 2). I had been handcuffed with my arms behind the chair back. I had chains wrapped around my body and around my arms. I also had my legs chained to a chair leg each. By the feel of the handcuffs they must be a really recent make. I won't be able to crack these open. Not YET anyway. The chains have been secured too tight making all arm mobility pretty buggered. Even if I did manage to escape Bob and Steve had guns so a shot to the head would slow me done for 10 minutes tops. (I can't die, be killed or age physically which means I get to stay looking the age of 17 and being about 400 in real life time. Cool huh?) I'd better not risk it.
'Why'd you spray me with bubbly?' I asked my captors.
'Thought it would be fun. It was a once in a lifetime chance and we just had to do it'. Steve said sarcastically. Policemen just don't know how to have fun. It's a well-known fact. Well in my mind anyway.
'Can I have some champagne?' Well if you're going to get caught for a crime you might as well commit another.
'Sorry. We're not allowed to give alcohol to prisoners.' How am I a prisoner when I've only just been caught?
'But if I'm drunk, how can I escape?' I can't escape anyway but I felt thirsty.
Bob and Steve thought about the idea for a brief moment. Wow. The police DO seem to get smarter. I was being sarcastic then for all you brain deads.
'Well…since it's you…why not.' Bob held the bottle for me while I drank. I drank down the smooth frothy liquid with relish. Yum. I quickly tugged the bottle out of his hand with my mouth by biting the bottleneck. I then threw the bottle towards Steve who was immediately knocked out cold.
'That was fun. Can I do that again?'
'Hell no!!!'
'Come on. Since it's me?' I gave Bob my cutest, irresistible face and waited for results. Bob could only just resist my face.
'NO!!!' Just as I thought. The man's gay.
'Well we're going to have to run a few blood tests now.'
'Why? I've not had a trial yet.'
'We need to check if you're on drugs, ill, mentally ill or if you have any children, which I hardly doubt.'
'And what's that supposed to mean?' I spat back. Why do they always question me like this. It's not fair. Just because I'm ultimate sex god to the stars (in my imagination) doesn't mean he has to judge me for it. I can't help it.
'Anyway I'm going to need your blood.' He said after putting on some sterilised gloves and as he prepared the syringe, which he had taken out of a draw. Taking it out of a packet he readied it for me. Damn. I hate injections in all shapes and sizes. They bloomin' hurt. Especially when the person giving it to you looks like the ROUGH type.
As he rolled up the sleeve of my left arm and rubbed the location of penetration with a cotton ball I quickly squeezed my eyes shut. As the needle prodded into my skin I felt a horrible sensation, which was painful. And so the screaming began.
'OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OOOWWW!!!' I started struggling but he carried on regardless. I must be pretty damn stupid because the struggling made it hurt even more. Finally, he withdrew the needle and as a result of the struggle I had a deep scratch from the needle. It bloody well hurt but he didn't care or give me a plaster.
After inserting the blood into a test tube he inserted it into a slot tray, which seemed to be connected to a computer. He switched on the computer and the magic of technology ensued.
'Welcome to Blood test programme 11.0.' spoke the computer.
' Test subject: Dark Mousy. Age: 400. Birthday: Unknown. Blood type: AB Positive.'
It was amazing that computers could actually do that.
Bob started the first test.
'The HIV test has been selected. Result: Negative.'
'Hey! What was that for?'
'Just in case you DO go to prison.' He wrote the result on a piece of paper.
'The Illness test for mental and physical biology test selected. Results: None.'
Again he wrote it down on a piece of paper. But what I found was that the next test would change my life.
'Off spring test selected. Results: one child. Congratulations.'Bob wrote it down on the piece of paper but I could he was surprised by the result. He was probably expecting MORE kids.
'I have a kid?'
'You didn't know?!' exclaimed Bob in yet more surprise.
'I…I want to see my child.'
'You WHAT?'
'I want to see my child! Is that too much to ask?' I don't know why I have a sudden urge to see it. My mouth seemed to take over my brain. On hearing the news my unwhole ness had been filled. To know that my son or daughter was walking around right this minute was too much to take.
'Besides. Aren't I allowed a final request before court?'
'I guess so.'
'Then I would like to see my child tomorrow.'
'But it would be too dangerous. I don't think it's a good idea for the child to be mixed up with someone like you.'
'Wouldn't you do the same in my shoes?'
'-sigh- OK but that's it. I'll even let you go tonight but on one condition.'
'What?'
'I have to escort you.'
'Fine.'
The journey back to the Niwa house was tiresome but I was allowed out of the van. As I walked towards the gate I asked, 'Can I keep the crown?'
'No!!!' He swiped it off me and off the van went.
I couldn't believe. It I was a dad.
Author's note: Well there you have it. Like it? Wups. The author's note has started. I'm in for some punishment. NNNOOOOO!!!! 'Come on Daisukebebop. Off to the bathroom we go'. Dark drags me to the bathroom by the foot for some SERIOUS punishment . What would Rika say? 'She's here?!' Dark drops my foot while he looks around confused and I make a run for it. See ya!
Daisukebebop.
