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Lullaby of Tears


My mother says I look pale, and drawn. My father says that I've changed, that I've lost my childness. They don't know how right they are. My whole world has fallen around me, and it's up to me, Hermione Granger, to help save it.

Three years ago today I came home to my parents, in tears, frightened, knowing that my world was about to change in horrific ways. My parents had been so afraid, I remember. They had met me at Knights Crossing, and I could hardly speak, tears clogged my voice, I was so upset. "He came back! He's come back, and it's all going to change!" I remember crying, as my mother wrapped her arms me, rubbing her hands over my hair, whispering words of comfort. I was fifteen at the time.

I'm seventeen years old now, and I have left my school, some of my best friends, and I was now going to leave my parents. I have to go with Harry; I have to go help him find the Horcruxes. We; Harry, Ron, and I, we are going to find the Horcruxes, and destroy them, so Voldomort can be defeated.

Lord Voldomort, the wizard that is trying to take over the world, and the wizard that had killed, and was killing countless people. He had been destroyed sixteen years ago, at least his body had. Harry, as a baby, had been an inch from death, and his mother, his young, caring mother, had died for him, making a bond between herself and Harry, a bond that saved Harry's life, and destroyed Voldomort's. He was torn from his body, his soul a lingering wisp in the air, and that was all that was left of him.

Then three years ago it had happened. He had come back, made himself a body in the crudest possibly way, and securing Harry's fate.

Now he was struggling to make himself the dictator he had always dreamed of being, not caring who he killed, whose lives he destroyed, in the process.

Mine included. I am about to do the thing I have dreaded for the last year, the very thing I knew would have to happen. I am sending my parents away, far away, so Voldomort can't find them. I have to do it, or Voldomort will go after them in my absence, and kill them, just to get to Harry. I have had countless nightmares about it, envisioning their deaths, their tortures. I can't let it happen, I have to protect them. They have spent the last seventeen years of my life protecting me, caring for me, taking care of my needs. And now it's my turn, my turn to save them from the known, and unknown dangers.

Hot tears slide my cheeks, and I brush them away roughly, trembling from head to foot as I stand, and walk down the halls, feeling numb, and cold. Mum and Father are in the kitchen, I can hear them talking, in hushed tones, so they don't wake me, since I told them I was going to have a lie down.

"Hermione, dear!" Mum said, standing quickly to her feet. "I didn't know you where awake yet."

I smile at her, feeling an immense feeling of sorrow, that I hope is hidden from them for the moment. "I was just sitting in my room a few minutes. Thinking." I take a deep breath, trying to slow my racing heart. "Mum, Father, I need to talk to you."

They share a look, and then look at me. "Alright, sit down, Buddy." Father says, using his pet name for me.

I move to do as he asked, and sit in a wooden dining chair. "Do you remember what I told you three years ago, when I came home from Hogwarts?"

Mum nodded, hey eyes flashing to Father, then back at me.

"Well, it's gotten worse. I've told you a little bit, but there's more." I take another shaky breath, and dive in. "This wizard, Voldomort, is slowly, and surely, taking control of the Wizarding world. Like I've said before, he, and his followers have caused most of the terrible things that have happened as of late. Do you remember what I told you about my friend Harry?" They both nod. "Well, he's the only one that can stop Voldomort. And there's only way it can be done." I feel tears welling in my eyes, but I fight them back, knowing I can't start to cry right now, or I will never stop. "And I am going to help him."

I look at them, watching their faces closely, a lump in my throat that I can't swallow.

Mum looks at me, her face showing many feeling. Confusion, then surprise, shock, fear, and finally, hurt. Father's face shows many of the same emotions, and he stands suddenly.

"I have to go, Father." I whisper, looking him in the eye. "He needs my help, and I need to help him."

Father looks over at me, his own brown eyes showing pain, and behind that, fear. "That's not all, though, is it, Hermione?"

I slowly shake my head, dreading what I know has to be said. "No, it's not. Voldomort is an evil man, if you can call him a man. He kidnaps and kills children, just to provoke their parents, widowed wives, tortured and killed families because one chooses not to join his ranks." Mum starts shaking her head; tears falling freely down her cheeks. "He's going to try to hunt you two down, after I'm gone. He'll find out eventually that I'm not at Hogwarts, that I'm off with Harry and Ron, and he is going to do everything possible to get to Harry, even if it means killing his friend's parents." The lump in my throat is growing larger, making it hard to talk. Tears are blurring my vision, but I dare not let them fall. "You have to go into hiding. You have to be hidden so completely that he won't find you, and there's only one way to do that." A single tear slid down my face, and fell onto the table, making a tiny drop on the oak surface. "You have to leave the country. You have to go far enough way that he won't find you, that he won't know where you've gone."

Father put a hand on Mum's shoulder, and looks at me, his eyes glossy, and his chin trembled a slight bit. "I suppose," He says after a moment of silence. "That we can go visit my parents in Finland, for a few months."

I look down at the table, and choke back a sob, then look back up at him. "No, Father." I say softly. "It's not far enough. You have to go really far, out of Europe, even. America, Asia, Australia, Africa, anywhere! But not here, where he can find you."

He looks down at Mum, who has her hand over her mouth, still shaking her head.

"Hermione, darling, we can't leave you." Mum says, folding her hands tightly in front of her, a look of determination setting on her face. "We will do everything we can, to help you, and to stay out of harms way, but I refuse, we refuse to hide from a single man."

I had been afraid of this. My parents had never seemed to understand how powerful a wizard was, what they could do, and it was going to get them killed like so many other Muggles. "Mum, you don't understand. Voldomort is a wizard. With a flick of his wand, he can send you into a fit of pain, break every bone in your body, erase all your memories one by one, or kill you. And he will. He will do anything to find Harry, and us."

"Why do you have to go, why do you have to help this boy?" Father asked me, a hint of anger in his voice.

"Because if I don't, he might die. He might fail, he might not. But I have to whatever I can to help him, to assist him in every possible way. Mum, Father, you have to understand, if Voldomort is not stopped, if he continues to become more powerful, he will not die. He will forever rule over the world, and after a while, if he gets his way, he will kill every single Muggle, every single Muggle-born, including myself, and anyone else he sees fit." I was on the verge of shouting now. I need them to understand, they have to get what I'm saying, their lives depend on it! "If I do not do what I can, then I will die, along with countless others."

Mum starts to shake, and Father wraps an arm around her, protectively. "Hermione, your mother and I will do everything we can to stay safe, from where we are, in this house. You can put spells on it, or whatever it is you do, and whatever is necessary, but we are going stay here, in our home."

"He'll find you!" I shout, jumping from my seat. How can they not understand?! "The Potters, Harry's parents, they had so many enchantments around their house, they couldn't even leave! But Voldomort found them, and he killed them. He'll do the same to you too, and I can't let that happen!" Tears are falling down my face freely now, and I don't bother to wipe them away. "I can't let that happen, and I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe." I look at them, hoping to see some understanding there, some sense of agreement. I'm disappointed; their faces still show the same determination that I know is etched upon my own. "I can't lose you like he lost his." I whisper.

"I'm sorry, Hermione." Father says, tears now sliding down his own face. "We will not give in. Please, let's just close this matter, and spend the next few days together."

I slide back into my chair, feeling defeated. "Please, just think about it."

They both look at me, and Mum nods. "We will, Hermione. We will."


Much later that evening, I sneak out my room. It is just past twelve, and I've spent the entire night fighting tears. I knew it might come to this, I should have expected it.

I am to leave tonight, to go to the Burrow for Bill and Fleur's wedding, before leaving with Harry and Ron.

Before I leave, I have to do it. I have to protect my parents, like they have done for me my whole life. I am going to change their memories, and send them to Australia. If all goes well, they should be there by the end of the week. I bought the tickets earlier, and I had arranged before I had talked to them for a renter to move in on Monday. They will have no recollections of me; they will think they are childless, and that their life ambition is to move to Australia.

I reach their bedroom door, and put my hand on the knob to open it, but find that it is locked. They don't trust me; they know that I am going to do whatever it takes to keep them safe.

"Alohomora." I whisper, pointing my wand at the lock. It clicks, and I am now able to open it. I walk into their room, and look around. It is the same as it has been since I was five. Powder blue walls, a blue and white striped rug on the floor, and a flowered and striped comforter.

Mum and Father are both sound asleep, which I am thankful for. I walk quietly towards their bed, feeling repulsion for what I am about to do. They are so…innocent. I know this is not one would normally think of their parents, but it is how they look, innocent. Father has his arm draped across Mum, who still has traces of tears on her otherwise perfect features. "I love you so much." I whisper, restraining myself from reaching out and touching Mum's arm.

I point my wand at Father first, fighting back the flood of tears that was threatening to spill. "Obliviate." I whisper, erasing everything he remembers, and after a second, say the spell, and add the new ones. He doesn't even stir, doesn't make a noise. I choke back a sob, and turn my wand onto Mum, and repeat the spells.

I look down at them, and brushing my lips against both of their cheeks. "I will always love you, and I will see you again." I whisper, still fighting tears. "Goodbye, Mum, and Father, please forgive me."

And without another word, I turn and flee the room, not bothering to shut the door on my way out. I run to my room, and shut the door tightly behind me. I only have a few minutes to gather my things, which I had packed earlier. I put them all in a pile by the door, and turn to take one last glance of the room. I have to make sure that is there not a trace left of me. I have put most of things in a trunk that I expanded, put in my closest, and locked with a spell that they would not be able to open. The rest I would be bringing with me, and using. I check all the drawers, surfaces, and anywhere else, and see nothing.

I sigh, and turn to leave, determined to leave quickly. I put and hand on my trunk that I am taking, and am about to apperate away, when a glimmer catches my eye. I quickly bend down, and look under my desk. Lying there is a gold locket; it had caught the faint glow of the ceiling light. I reach for it, and sit back, the necklace in my hand.

Memories flood my mind, making my tears return again. I had received the locket the previous Christmas, as a gift from my parents. It has sixteen sapphires, my birthstone, and a picture of me with each of my parents inside.

I finger the locket, rubbing my thumb against it surface. I stand up, and walk to my nightstand, and I put the locket inside the drawer, then turn away. I can't take it with me, because if Voldomort captures me, then he will see their pictures, and hunt them down. I can't let that happen.

I again put my hand on my trunk, and gripping it tightly, apperated right outside the Burrow, where I promptly run to the front door, dragging the trunk with me. I knock on the door, and Ron answers it immediately.

"Hermione, I was getting worried." He says, taking my trunk from me. He drags into the kitchen, and sets it by the stairs.

"Where is everyone?" I ask, suddenly very weary.

Ron turns around to look at me. "Well, they went to bed. It is after one. I told them I would wait for you."

I smile, grateful that I wouldn't have to deal with the whole Weasley clan until morning. "And Harry?"

"Arrives tomorrow."

I nod, and without warning, burst into tears. "I had to do it the hard way, Ron." I cry, burying my face in my hands.

Ron is immediately at my side, his arms wrapped around me tightly. "I'm sorry, 'Mione." He whispers into my hair, rubbing his hands up and down on my back.

I put my face on his shoulder, and let the torrents of tears flood over me, as Ron comforts me, whispering words of sympathy and comfort. I cry, cry for my parents, cry for Harry, cry for all that has to be done, and cry for the hurt that I feel. I cry a lullaby of tears, letting loose all the feelings of pain, and hurt. I will survive, and I will come back to them, but tonight I want to cry; tonight I want to mourn my parents, mourn my pain away. But hear me, I will make it through this, and maybe someday, someday once this horrible ordeal is over, there will beauty from pain, and our world will closer than ever before.


A/N Hello everyone! So I've had the idea for this story for a while, and it really began to form last month when I was writing 25 Days of Christmas, so I wrote it down! I did not have a beta for this story, but I did proofread it about ten times, so I hope I caught all my mistakes. This is the first story I have written that is first POV, written in present pretenses, so I'm afraid that it's a little mixed up, but like I said, it was proofread, so I believe that I caught it all. So if you saw any mistakes, please forgive me. I hope you all liked this one, I tried my hardest to get the feelings I believe Hermione was feeling in this ordeal in the story, and I think I did a well enough job. So, please leave a review, constructive criticism, please no flamers!

Her-My-Oh-Knee

Sam

P.S. I put the title of about four songs in the last paragraph, I swear I will read and review the person that can name all, or at least three, of them! Love all of you!